Secret Gamer Girl / SecretGamerGrrl / Googleshng / "Violet Hargrave" / Jacob Lawrence (Jake) Alley / Violet Cassandra Ocean - Delusional Zoe Quinn Stalker, Libelous Tweeter, Thirsty Gnome, Faux-Tranny Neckbeard Incel, Micropenis, "Known Troubled Person", Creator of "Massive vs the Masses", Self-Described "Noise Making Thing"; Lives in Niantic, CT

[downloads]

So is that what the 911 call was? God he's such a little shit, he wouldn’t get all the sympathy he wanted if he had said it was his grandmother since he’s always said what a terrible person he thought she was.

 

[repentance]

So is that what the 911 call was? God he's such a little shit, he wouldn’t get all the sympathy he wanted if he had said it was his grandmother since he’s always said what a terrible person he thought she was.

I'm assuming so, as it was the same day. He was certainly happy to let people post "I hope you're safe" without indicating that the emergency wasn't his and didn't put his safety at risk. He's such a weasel.

 

[Next Task]

He should elaborate on how and why his mother defaced his social security card in a semi-subconscious manner.

Just a theory, but maybe she put it through the wash? An accident he has to of course imply was done to deliberately hobble him?

Or he had it out somewhere and got it covered with tendies grease and since he's never to blame it must have been his mother who made them extra-greasy just to ruin the card.

He's such a weasel.

He plays the 'pity me' angle so much he might as well pin it to his Twitter and stamp it on his avatar. His online begging is particularly weaselly, because he'll twist any situation into a lie around one tiny grain of truth, just so he can look more deserving of charity. When in fact he's just too lazy and pathetic to do anything to get what he wants.

 

[Apteryx Owenii]

Well that sucks, especially around the holidays. I can't help but think that Jake's mom would be in a better position if she could depend on her kid(s) for emotional support right now. I wonder if the relative is coming basically as a housesitter to make sure Jake doesn't burn the place down trying to figure out how to microwave tendies.

I'm assuming so, as it was the same day. He was certainly happy to let people post "I hope you're safe" without indicating that the emergency wasn't his and didn't put his safety at risk. He's such a weasel.

This is just such a Jake thing to do.

 

[pozilei]

Jake's grandmother (the one he whined about staying at their place for a few weeks) had a stroke on Thursday. Things aren't looking good and the aunty who doesn't want Jake influencing her 18 year old daughter is on her way to Niantic. I expect Jake's mum isn't around to cater to his Christmas whims. It's possible other cousins who've put distance between themselves and Jake (including Jono) are also flying in.

Do you have some screen shots by any chance? Not that I don't believe you because that would make perfect sense (vaguetweeting about some 911 call, "feeling alone" because mom is away and can't make him special nomnoms because his tummy hurts or whatever).

Mom Alley could probably really use someone to hold down the fort right now while she's busy with other stuff. Someone to at least do the dishes, wash some clothes, do some grocery shopping for the bare necessities. Things you can usually expect from someone in their 30s. But sadly she's got this fat waste of space at home who'll probably just sit on his ass, play vidya and seethe on twitter because grandma ruined his Christmas with her stupid stroke.

Man, shit like this makes it really hard not to completely a-log Jake.

 

[repentance]

Do you have some screen shots by any chance? Not that I don't believe you because that would make perfect sense (vaguetweeting about some 911 call, "feeling alone" because mom is away and can't make him special nomnoms because his tummy hurts or whatever).

Rene is Jono's mum and Rachel's eldest sister.

https://archive.fo/7UKVm

 

[downloads]

I wonder if this is why he’s been flipping out about a new place to live, grandma has been ill for a bit it sounds like. Maybe there’s been talk of her moving back in with Jakes mom.

 

[andr0id psycho sho(ker]

I wonder if this is why he’s been flipping out about a new place to live, grandma has been ill for a bit it sounds like. Maybe there’s been talk of her moving back in with Jakes mom.

meanwhile as those talks happen, the thing in the attic mutters in discontent

 

[Diana Moon Glampers]

This sounds like an amazing sitcom.

Paranoid elderly granny in failing health, gnomebeard guy who pretends he's an anime princess online and never leaves the house (and believes himself to be the very model of femininity while being to any viewer a clearly repulsive, slimeball male), and the semi-normal but sort of softheaded mom trying to keep a roof over everyone's heads.

 

[GethN7]

This sounds like an amazing sitcom.

Paranoid elderly granny in failing health, gnomebeard guy who pretends he's an anime princess online and never leaves the house (and believes himself to be the very model of femininity while being to any viewer a clearly repulsive, slimeball male), and the semi-normal but sort of softheaded mom trying to keep a roof over everyone's heads.

While amusing, the sheer depths of Jake's selfishness are pretty galling.

He has a relative in ill health and his mother wants to care for her own mother if at all possible, and all Jake can consider is how it will make him uncomfortable.

 

[repentance]

 

[Next Task]

Maybe there’s been talk of her moving back in with Jakes mom.

Oh, that would be delicious. All of Jake's talk of housing insecurity, having an unsafe environment, abusive living situation and feeling persecuted - all because his grandmother had a stroke and needed care and was going to be moving in for her last days on earth.

So it could all be just that Jake has to, at most, give up his room for his sick grandmother, and that's what he's been claiming is such a terrible state of affairs. It would be so quintessentially Jake that even though the timelines don't match because he's been increasing his performative panic for weeks now, it feels like there's some truth there. That he's not being pushed into getting a job, or getting out more, or getting real help - that all his panic and desperate begging comes down to having to move downstairs so someone else can use his room.

I just honestly believe he's so pathetic that it would be something as small as that which is making him freak out.

 

[repentance]

Oh, that would be delicious. All of Jake's talk of housing insecurity, having an unsafe environment, abusive living situation and feeling persecuted - all because his grandmother had a stroke and needed care and was going to be moving in for her last days on earth.

So it could all be just that Jake has to, at most, give up his room for his sick grandmother, and that's what he's been claiming is such a terrible state of affairs. It would be so quintessentially Jake that even though the timelines don't match because he's been increasing his performative panic for weeks now, it feels like there's some truth there. That he's not being pushed into getting a job, or getting out more, or getting real help - that all his panic and desperate begging comes down to having to move downstairs so someone else can use his room.

I just honestly believe he's so pathetic that it would be something as small as that which is making him freak out.

I doubt that anyone would expect an 80 year old woman with declining health to sleep in an attic, but just the suggestion that grandma might need to start spending more time at Rachel's would have been enough to piss Jake off.

 

[Hellfire]

Cow crossover, CHELSAY! http://archive.li/nNly9

 

[Wallace]

Oh, that would be delicious. All of Jake's talk of housing insecurity, having an unsafe environment, abusive living situation and feeling persecuted - all because his grandmother had a stroke and needed care and was going to be moving in for her last days on earth.

So it could all be just that Jake has to, at most, give up his room for his sick grandmother, and that's what he's been claiming is such a terrible state of affairs. It would be so quintessentially Jake that even though the timelines don't match because he's been increasing his performative panic for weeks now, it feels like there's some truth there. That he's not being pushed into getting a job, or getting out more, or getting real help - that all his panic and desperate begging comes down to having to move downstairs so someone else can use his room.

I just honestly believe he's so pathetic that it would be something as small as that which is making him freak out.

He's going to have to give up something much more dear to him than his precious nerd-nest: the attention Mommy gives him. Now there's someone else in the house who is going to be the focus of his mother's time and energy.

 

[Done]

He's going to have to give up something much more dear to him than his precious nerd-nest: the attention Mommy gives him. Now there's someone else in the house who is going to be the focus of his mother's time and energy.

You mean the same transphobic bigoted mother who feeds him those Nazi tendies and buys him gamer propaganda vidya?

 

[Hellbound Hellhound]

"Violet Hargrave".
"Secret Gamer Girl".

 

[AnOminous]

"Violet Hargrave".
"Secret Gamer Girl".

I like how he's staring at the camera like a Death Row inmate getting his annual mug shot, because he knows people will be laughing at this picture for years to come.

 

[Done]

"Violet Hargrave".
"Secret Gamer Girl".

I like how he's staring at the camera like a Death Row inmate getting his annual mug shot, because he knows people will be laughing at this picture for years to come.

I love how this simple, yet deceptively effective joke is what powered the entirety of the past 760 pages. This is essentially a one-joke thread if you sit down and really strip it down to its essential parts.

You would think that anyone would just do the sane thing: Confess to being a real-life gnome and spoil our one funny joke, but I am extremely confident that Jake will keep playing the stupid game and expecting not-stupid prizes, because Jake is an insane person on the internet, because Jake is a fucking Lolcow.

Merry Christmas, and here's a toast to the inevitable +240 pages, yon stupid gnome!

 

[Jaimas]

Continuing to flesh out Jakey's deets on his harassment campaigns.
Remember, running afoul of Quinn-sempai once is enough to make Jakey an enemy of yours for life.

Many, if not all of Jake's campaigns of harassment follow several similar trends: He started them on behalf of someone he decided to white knight, went all-in attacking them and libeling them, and continued long after both the target and person he was white knighting forgot the incident ever happened. In several cases, this has led Jake to continue his attacks for 4 years or more.