Containment Dimensional Merge tweets megathread - 1/2 - Chris is salty Merge hasn't happened: "Damn Dimension 1218’s “Reality” Limits and Shit!!!"

[Jesse's Arbok]

Please nobody tell him that Spongebob's creator died. I can't handle more of his cringy merge tweets.

"Stephen Hillenburg isn't really dead! Him and his counterpart in C-197 have merged, and are now happily dancing with SpongeBob and all of his pals down at the Krusty Krab! Remember, have faith, and use COMMON SENSE"

 

[White bubblegum]

"Stephen Hillenburg isn't really dead! Him and his counterpart in C-197 have merged, and are now happily dancing with SpongeBob and all of his pals down at the Krusty Krab! Remember, have faith, and use COMMON SENSE"

a lot of people would want to believe that

 

[Guardsman42]

a lot of people would want to believe that

From any one but Chris-Chan.

 

[Pickle Inspector]

I don't even think he's on par with teenagers. They're pretty snappy and don't shit themselves on a regular basis.

Aren’t the teens he hangs out with troons and/or bronies? It’s not like they’re average socially adjusted teenagers and even then from what I can gather they don’t treat him as an equal and humour his craziness in the best case scenario or are maliciously making it worse by being idea guys at worst.

 

[AnOminous]

I wouldn't be surprised if he has a combination of several different learning disorders

I think he's gotten worse with his increasing isolation. He seems less capable of being coherent.

 

[Gym Leader Elesa]

I think he's gotten worse with his increasing isolation. He seems less capable of being coherent.

As He continues to manifest the first signs of the Prophetic Gift, no doubt the whispers from the Place-Outside-Time will twist His words into mutated True Speech.

Pay this no mind. The egg ferments and He grows in power.

 

[Guardsman42]

Guys, I need to go get spinal X-rays done today.

If the Merge happens when I'm being X-rayed, what are the medical rammifcations? Like, did Chris address the effects of X-rays on The Merge?

 

[Eichsterd123]

"Stephen Hillenburg isn't really dead! Him and his counterpart in C-197 have merged, and are now happily dancing with SpongeBob and all of his pals down at the Krusty Krab! Remember, have faith, and use COMMON SENSE"

chris would actually say that

 

[PT 940]

Guys, I need to go get spinal X-rays done today.

If the Merge happens when I'm being X-rayed, what are the medical rammifcations? Like, did Chris address the effects of X-rays on The Merge?

You will morph into some weird human/medical freak and Chris will begin including you in his stories

 

[Guardsman42]

You will morph into some weird human/medical freak and Chris will begin including you in his stories

Thank god it didn't happen today!

Also for a federally appointed medical place, it was a total dive. Chris-Chan would have approved of it.

 

[Hexbox]

I quit checking this place for a few months and return to Chris spouting some L. Ron Hubbard-level craziness. He's going up the bridge, ladies and gents.

 

[BeanBidan]

I think he's gotten worse with his increasing isolation. He seems less capable of being coherent.

Kind of reminds me of a older head I used to know since highschool. After years of doing drugs and shit, the last time i hung out with him. He wasn't even coherent. If you talked about something he'd be talking about something completely different.

 

[Guardsman42]

Kind of reminds me of a older head I used to know since highschool. After years of doing drugs and shit, the last time i hung out with him. He wasn't even coherent. If you talked about something he'd be talking about something completely different.

I know some drunks get like that as well. Met my share, good reason to not ruin your life with rampant abuse of substances.

But Chris apparently has no true isolation and knows people in real life. Which means he's just going batshit crazy either way and I have yet to see THE MERGE!!

 

[Mason Verger]

I know people will say Chris wanking to smashmouth is disturbing, but at least that was just perverted blackmail. His recent dementional merge video is, to me, faaar more unsettling. You're watching a legitimate insane person. You can actually see it in his eyes:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=pShpKZ9CXfU

 

[PT 940]

Kind of reminds me of a older head I used to know since highschool. After years of doing drugs and shit, the last time i hung out with him. He wasn't even coherent. If you talked about something he'd be talking about something completely different.

Sometimes people are "messed up" in a general way and years of drugs/alcohol abuse make it much, much worse.

 

[Second Missing Primarch]

I know people will say Chris wanking to smashmouth is disturbing, but at least that was just perverted blackmail. His recent dementional merge video is, to me, faaar more unsettling. You're watching a legitimate insane person. You can actually see it in his eyes:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=pShpKZ9CXfU

Yeah, I was more creeped out by that video than any of the weird fetish-y shit I've seen him do. You can almost see the fuses blowing in his brain as he's ranting about his waifus/husbandos and telling people not to contact Megan.

 

[PT 940]

Yeah, I was more creeped out by that video than any of the weird fetish-y shit I've seen him do. You can almost see the fuses blowing in his brain as he's ranting about his waifus/husbandos and telling people not to contact Megan.

DON'T CALL ANYBODY! ESPECIALLY MEGAN!!!

 

[Ghostbeater]

I know people will say Chris wanking to smashmouth is disturbing, but at least that was just perverted blackmail. His recent dementional merge video is, to me, faaar more unsettling. You're watching a legitimate insane person. You can actually see it in his eyes:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=pShpKZ9CXfU

Is that sonichuizcool guy one of us or is he just another try hard JackZ who "just wanna be friendz"?

Edit: He is in the comments

 

[Mason Verger]

Is that sonichuizcool guy one of us or is he just another try hard JackZ who "just wanna be friendz"?

Edit: He is in the comments

Looks like another twat trying to get a little Chris fame. Though his approach is similar to Jack Z and Lucas the puppet fucker.

 

[fiu0cm]

This is very :autism:. I decided to "translate" the merge video into something more digestible (with Twitter citations). It's still long, as True and Honest as possible, and chronological, but it removes a lot of Chris' meandering and stochastic speech patterns. The actual content in the video is, more or less, consistent with what Chris has said previously, and since, on Twitter. It's not just incoherent, off the cuff rambling (but it's still fucking stupid).

Spoiler

• 1218 is going to merge with its counterpart dimension C-197, where most fictional characters exist
• A majority of Earth's human population will survive, definitely including people Chris likes, and definitely not including certain politicians (he later changes the survival rate)
  
• Chris and the God of Abraham are determining who lives and who dies (Chris doesn't mention Fate or any other decision making deities in this video)
  
• God is a woman, and is supporting, and being supported by, Chris with regard to the merge
• As Chris is a very "integrated" and important part of the merge, and the strain is causing frequent headaches
• Chris will soon be able to transform into his Sonichu form and use powers like mach speed running, thunder attacks, and psychic attcks
  
• The Anchuent Prophecy foretold the merge
• Chris absorbed the spiral seal from his Dreamcast (this means, apparently, that he absorbed Uzume Tennouboshi, the goddess of the Dreamcast)
• Chris' Commodore still has an issue with its video port, but someone is helping him resolve the issue
• Chris absorbed the powers, soul, and memories of Scarlet (this is one of my favorite dimensional merge threads, because Chris is trying to act like he's not talking about himself), the CPU goddess of the C64 and nation of Comma
• Scarlet was friends with Rei Ryghts, the goddess of Atari, and Comma fell into West Virginia
• After Comma fell, Scarlet died and her soul was absorbed into Chris' C64
  
• Chris has verified on the internet that Scarlet is the goddess of the C64 (I fairly certain that everything he says about Scarlet in this video is just him reading his Twitter posts about Scarlet in Summer 2018, it's word-for-word for several sentences)
• Chris' official title is Mrs. Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu CPU Blue Heart of CWCville, Comma, and the consoles of Commodore
• Chris is still learning his responsibilities and powers as the goddess of Commodore
• Everyone will notice differences as the merge progresses
• You're not supposed to shoot the fictional characters because Chris says it's bad
• Chris says this video is his from-the-heart, scriptless, best attempt at explaining the merge (despite his Twitter posts existing)
• You're supposed to remain calm during the merge, and everyone will be able to meet all of their favorite superheroes (it's not clear whether it's everyone who survives the merge, or if this is a contradiction from earlier)
• You're also supposed to stay away from villains and super-villains and let Chris protect you, but you might have the opportunity to meet your favorite villains at conventions (Chris doesn't know)
  
• Chris' dimensional merge tweets are true facts and comprehensive (Chris mimes the text being very long with his arms)
• Chris personally addresses Megan, implores everyone to refrain from contacting her, explains that he holds no ill will towards her, explains that he has no intention to pursue her because of his marriage to Magi-Chan, Cryzel, Mewtwo, and Sylvana
• Megan's counterpart, Sailor Meg-tune, was stripped of her powers in somewhere between 2006-2008 (Chris isn't sure), and entered politics in Lastation (PlayStation's country in the Neptunia shit)
  
• Real Megan and her counterpart are two halves of CPU Red Heart, the goddess of an unnamed (and, allegedly, censored on the internet) Nintendo console only released in Germany
• Megan can connect to her counterpart by keeping an open mind and open heart, and can transform into CPU Red Heart with a pen that Megan has
• Megan can direct any questions to the CPU goddesses from the games/anime, or to Chris directly
• Again, while the merge is happening, be aware of your surroundings and watch out for villains, but don't shoot them, because Chris will protect you (even though he's still learning what his powers do)
  
• Famous bronies should be in telepathic contact with their original characters

I'm pretty sure Chris' "internet verification" of Scarlet came from the Neptunia wiki for Rei Ryghts. The edit is just copied from "The Talk" thread. If this is true, his confirmation is literally from his own text to Null.