Share Your School Stories - Weirdos, freaks, and idiots (self-inclusion optional)

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I knew a girl (really nice, btw) who by some amazing lack of effort that almost constitutes as effort in itself, managed to have a 0.0% GPA. I just don't even know, man. I'll admit that I once managed an impressively bad P.E grade but that teacher was a cunt who hated me and would find any way to lower my grade. I had an abysmal 17% in that class at one point.*yawn*
 
When I was in kindergarten I stuck my finger in a hamster's cage and it bit me.
In first grade I had this bitch teacher who was mean to me all the time. At one point this kid who used to poke me with a pencil ended up trying to stab me with a pencil. I was freaking out because I didn't want to get hurt by him, so I tried to run away from him while he chased after me. The stupid teacher yelled at me instead of him even though it was obvious he was trying to attack me.
SMH.
 
When I was in sixth grade, some dumbass thought it’d be a wonderful idea to stuff lint into a dryer in the boys bathroom. Everyone was evacuated and we had to stay outside for the rest of the school day as firefighters extinguished the fire. In January. While it was raining outside.
 
Oh man where do i start
There was this autistic kid that i bullied for 3 years until he learned to control his tism and we became friends
The kid that had a gf that would masturbate him in the back during classes
And the blind kid that was the son of harvey weinstein and would molest everything that moved until i broke his jaw
The 13 year old girl that had a 30 year old boyfriend
My school years were like a bad acid trip :)
 
When I was about eleven to twelve years old. This Christian school that I've attended would have two grade levels’ being taught in one single class. Like K to 1st, 2nd to 3rd, etc. The first day of school, there was about a few fresh faces showing up in our class. To keep this kid's identity a secret, let's just use his initials.

So, I came up to this kid called I.T, yes, those where his initials. I asked him if he was excited for any new video game that came out recently.

He came out like shaking uncontrollable and probably yelled. I Told the kid sitting next to me about how much of a weirdo he was.

Oh, and there was this one time he pissed in his pants while we were being taught mathematics in class. He was holding it in for about a whole hour, He came running out the door pissing. Worst part of it I almost got my jack wet while sitting in-front of him.

After Lunch we would help our professor clean up the cafeteria. Then I.T Autistically Screeched, telling our professors that their where voices in his head saying "yes you did, yes you did" while crying in the back of the cafe. He even yelled every-time our professor turned the A.C on, mentioning that he had voices in his head saying "Yes you Did"

I recalled he also had like a Thomas the Tank engine lunch box and had been home-schooled through most of his life and his mother was divorced or something. One of my classmates mentioned to us that he hugged her mother for about fifteen minutes; her mother's reaction oh crap he almost wanted to yell.

I think this kid probably suffered from schizophrenia or something.
 
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In high school, I was in school for the Deaf. There was this one Deaf girl, I'll call her Kiki, she was this scrawny ginger girl. She joined in our school in middle of the year, and nobody talk to her for some unknown reason, I commend them for being smart not to talk with her. Unfortunately, I can't avoid not talking to her, because I was into anime and I draws, I'm automatically her BEST FRIEND FOREVER. She developed this incredibly unhealthy clingy obsessive behavior around me.

The thing is, she scares me. I will explain why.

Everything she does is extremely cringey. She's a straight-up delusional weeaboo. That's fine, because, I'm used to those kind of people thanks to the internet, but, her incredibly clingy behavior is on the other hands. She would cling to me all the way in the hallway, and she would sometimes physically grab me and then hissed at my romantic partner at that time and childhood best friend whenever they came close to me. This is a very awkward and uncomfortable situation to be in. Especially when they had to physically grab me back to them away from her and I became a tug-o-war rope for them.

I remember other time, she would tell me about how she would find time to leave from this world to her fantasy world where she would be a goddess of this one planet, she's the queen, and she described all citizen on that planet to be some sort of emo anime Sasuke-like men, some elves, some vampires, they all kill each others to be loved by Kiki, the goddess/queen. She talk like it's her real-life experience. I found that questionable but I nodded alongside with her as I was busy trying to draw.

Fast forwarding to several months later, we had to take state test. When we're done with our state test, I will never fucking forget this moment where I nearly shat my pant. She was very unusually serious, there was no emotion on her face. She slowly turned her head to me, and then signed to me, "I know everything about you."
I laughed, slide this off because there's no way she'd know shits about me. "Oh really? Tell me about it. :biggrin:"
"I know you live with your mother, her name is [______]. Your family are [_] hours away from you. You wear a long over-the-knee socks under pants daily, and you have a low income. You also are constantly harassed on the internet, there was a webpage talking crap about you. Your childhood was- [and among with MANY more personal details, I do not wish to share here.]"

I noped the fuck out. I had to talk to one of our classmate about what just happened and he freaked out, he urged me to avoid her at all cost. He alarmed because he thinks Kiki is into some witchcraft shit which is probably how she got all of those weirdly specific personal information from.

Great. That wasn't very helpful. Now what? :stress:

A week later, she mysteriously disappeared from our school. She added me on Facebook, and at ONE time, I refused to take her advice. She blew up and screamed at me something about how I shouldn't disrespect her because she's my mother. (Spoiler: She isn't my mother. Otherwise, that would be a baby having a baby situation.) She later deleted her Facebook account, probably for forever.

Several years later, I saw she made a new Facebook account. I've decided to message her, sending her only a middle finger emoji, because, she fucking scares me. I blocked her immediately. She made a sockpuppet JUST to do the same back at me and blocked me.

I haven't heard anymore from her since then, and it better stay this way. She creep me out, and sometimes, I wonder if she have a fantasy version of me getting murdered by emo-asian-elves-Sasuke-Marysue characters in her fucked-up fantasy world.
 
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On one of the schools I studied, for some reason by the end of the school year around the last few weeks of class someone would bring some sort of hand made bomb and use it inside the school (most of the times during lunch break).

Don't think that the staff managed to catch anyone during the years that I was there.

No one got hurt because of it instead it would happen after since it was followed by commotion from the students (once someone even broke the glass window of the door of one of the classrooms).
 
During my middle school years, one kid thought it was a bright idea to climb up on the folded bleachers, and he ended up falling. He fell right on some gym equipments, and had a deep gash as a result. No one had noticed until I got up when he was crawling. Luckily he ended up fine.

Other school stories? None, the school forced me to be homebound due to getting sick all the time, if that counts.
 
OK, this happemed in high school: A couple of guys took ride on a commuter train and under the seats, they found a strip of photo negatives. (This was way before digital cameras became commonplace) The pics were of a buff buck naked bodybuilder, flexing his toned muscles and proudly displaying his ROCK HARD COCK.

They took the negatives to the computer lab, scanned them, made a bunch of printouts and posted "Mr. Stiffy" in various strategic locations all around school. They never got caught.
 
My biology teacher got a text to meet up with a male student after school and actually went. I don't know what happened or the context, but he resigned from the school straight after this and now works at a university apparently.
 
Freshman year of high school, saw the funniest thing the first day. The wood shop teacher, who had been going over every single safety rule in the known and unknown universe for every single tool in the universe, showed everyone how to use one of the saws...

And took off one of his fingers.

In his defense, he didn't even get pissed when some of us laughed.

Never trust a shop teacher with all his fingers.

There was a guy in a couple of my classes in one of the JR Highs I went to that was into Elf Quest. Drew it all the time, carried the books to class. Shit, he even wore elf ears a few times. Luckily, most of the people just giggled at him behind his back. But then there was this big fucker, who transferred in halfway through the year and everyone thought looked like a goddamn football player. Serious bully, and tried to hide behind people being racist because he's the only black kid in school. God, everyone hated him. Even the stoners hated him. Everyone hated this big fucker, but he was one of those thyroid freaks you get now and then who by the time they're in 8th grade they're like 6' tall with a full beard and shit. This asshole started picking on the Elf Quest kid, making fun of him and shit. The Elf Quest kid just blew it off, smiling and going back to his art. Well, big mongoloid fucks don't like that, so over a week it started escalating. In gym it finally came to a head out at the soccer/football field. Mongoloid punched Elf Quest in the back of the head, knocking him down. People tittered, some people yelled to quit it, the gym teacher just lit another cigarette and watched.

Elf Quest got up, brushed off his shirt, told Mongoloid to quit it. Mongo did what Mongos do. Swung at him.

Elf Quest did some shit none of us had seen outside of movies. He jumped up and kicked Mongo in his fucking face, knocking him on his ass. Every time Mongo went to get up, Elf Quest spin kicked him in the face again.

The teacher just smoked his cigarette. What does he give a fuck if two of the little hooligans he has to watch for shit pay kill each other? He was probably just glad he wasn't in Vietnam any more.

Finally Mongo gets the hint and stays down. Elf Quest goes back over, sits down on the metal bleachers, and goes back to reading his Elf Quest comic. Mongo claimed that Elf Quest beat him up because he was black. That shit didn't fly with Elf Quest being like 5' tall and 75 pounds of Patient Zero Nerd

Mongo was an asshole. Not only was he bigger than everyone, he was like every racist stereotype put together. Big and I mean BIG fucking lips constantly covered in slobber, thick as peanut butter, smelled weird, greasy skin, bigger than everyone and pushed people around, moved his lips when he read (slowly), stole people's lunches, broke into people's lockers, shit like that.

Every time that fucker got in trouble, he claimed it was because everyone was racist. If he got in a fight, he'd claim that the person he picked on called him a nigger. Claimed girls wouldn't go out with him because he was black. Worst of all, he was a fucking snitch. The only thing worse than a bully who was sneaky about the shit is someone who snitched on people.

Mongo'd steal your fucking bike, ride it to school, then snitch on your for being a racist when you got pissed at him for stealing your bike, then his parents would call the school yelling that you were a racist because Mongo stole your fucking bike. Then he'd ride it to school the next day and claim it was his.

Plus he was one of those skeezy fucks who liked to loom over girls, licking his fat slobbery lips and saying lewd shit. I mean, we were in 7th grade, we weren't angels, we knew lewd shit, but going up and asking a girl if she's ever sucked a big black cock and would she like to? Yeah, that was Mongo. Most of the time the girl's brother, or her friend's brothers, would beat the shit out of you for that, but if you did, Mongo went whining you were a racist, his parents whined you were racist, it just caused trouble.

He was like every bad fucking stereotype of black people.

Mongo got kicked out of school toward the end of the year when the mother of one of the Sped kids showed up at school fucking screeching. Apparently her daughter, who was one of those friendly happy helpful Special Ed kids into Jesus and puppet shows at church an stuff like that, had told her mom all about the stuff her and Mongo were doing after school and she wasn't fucking happy about it. That shit went around FAST that Mongo'd been sticking his dick in a girl like that, and the parents were fucking pissed. It went around the next day when Mongo didn't show up that his parents moved before the parents fucking lynched his ass.

I can't remember her name, I do remember I met her at first in the 10th grade. She was from LA (she claimed) and thought she was hot shit. Valley Girl accent, tight clothes, blonde hair in the Aqua-Net shellac style. She was absolutely convinced she was the best thing to hit our hick town ever. And everyone lapped that shit up.

Only thing was...

...the bitch stank.

Nobody would ever say anything about it. She was so cool, so awesome, she was from LA. Nobody mentioned the fact she smelled like bad cheese, an old used menstrual pad, and bad fish combined with BO. Nobody would say shit about it though. I asked a couple of my friends outside of school and they agreed, the bitch stank.

After a couple of months she started bullying a lot of girls. Mean shit. That went on for a while before she bullied a meek girl. She was quiet, wrote poetry, drew sketches, and was always doing math problems. Carla got up in her face one lunch, teasing her about being short, mousy, skinny, flat chested, all that catty shit.

The meek girl just looked up from her drawing and called her out on smelling like a bag of hooker assholes left out in the sun, then went back to drawing.

Carla kept trying to act like queen bee but it never worked. Last time I saw her was a few years back, working at a Wal-Mart.

She still smelled like a bag of cat assholes after a long day at the wharf.

When I was in elementary, they still had corporal punishment, so it wasn't uncommon to get a spanking in the principals office.

There was a lot of freaky stuff in in school. Weird people. I got a job early, so I pretty much didn't socialize with them outside of school. Which made it kind of strange, since I saw the school drama from inside the school, and heard all the juicy adult gossip at lunch.

I found out a lot of fucked up shit.
 
My elementary school was next to a dense wooded area where homeless people would camp. One day as I'm staring out of a window daydreaming I see a hobo shuffle out of the woods, climb a tall chain link fence that separated the school grounds from the woodlands, and then ascend a tree that was on school grounds. I see him fussing with his person, bending and twisting, eventually getting his pants and long johns down around his knees. He sits on a branch with his buttcheeks facing off towards the school and proceeds to shit out of the tree.

I get everyone's attention and point and yell, laughing. All of the kids rush to the windows to watch, teacher is trying to maintain order, gives up and goes to notify security. The hobo had one long, giant turd dangling from his cheeks, like two feet long no shit, before the teacher rushed back into class with another from across the hall and drew all of the blinds while making us return to our seats.
 
One time my middle school held some weird sex-ed/anti-drug conference that they forced everyone in my year to attend. They divided the girls and boys up into seperate classrooms and we discussed some basic sex ed topics. At one point we all gathered together to hear a guy give a speech about how doing drugs was bad. And it was fucking wild. As soon as the faculty let him on the stage he grabbed the mic and unleashed this verbal tirade about his hardcore drug addiction and all the crazy shit it led him to do. At one point he stops talking and starts loudly screaming, "THIS ISN'T A GAME! I HAVE A TATTOO OF SATAN RIDING A MOTORCYCLE ON MY BACK! THIS IS WHAT DRUGS DOES TO YOU!"
I don't remember much after that but while we were being herded on the buses back to school (this event was held in a separate building) I remember several of my classmates talking about how uncomfortable and scared he made them feel.
 
In 4th or 5th grade me and a group of my friends found a severed cat head on the basketball court. No idea how the fuck it got there but it was hella creepy.

In high school we had this autistic girl that everyone called "slender" after the slender man because she had an unsettling habit of standing far away and just dead stare at people without saying a word to anyone. That in itself is fairly harmless and you probably think that my school was full of cunts for making fun of her like this, and you're right, but that's only the tip of the iceberg with this girl. The real reason she was infamous in my school was the fact that she would literally just start randomly fingering herself violently while giggling like a maniac whenever she saw a boy she thought was cute. The teachers tried to stop her at first but the whole situation quickly became so buzzard that they usually just ignored it. She also threatened to bring a gun into school a handful of times, but nothing ever really came of it.
 
when i was teen we had this phone app called e-buddy which is basically a hotmail chatting app
so being in the middle east we had segregated schools for males and females
so someone passed me an email saying its a chick and i better hit dat
so yo boi got to talking and it went on for a week im talkin to this chick and suddenly she wants me to send pics of me
so horny me went to his mom -i was 16 years old- and told her to check me out how i looked and such of course after i told her about dis chick so i got suited up prom style no kidding
so yo boi sent the pic and after like 15 mins she starts to type and im like oh boi oh boi and in comes the laughs and lols i told her whats wrong ? she basically told me im old af and to get lost you geeky looking duuuud
so you know my ego took a hit a major one and sat there while my mom picked up my pieces trying to cheer me up
the days went by and i found out that the email belongs to the whole class and basically all the girls use it to spy on their boyfriends and i was being passed around everyday philsbadman :(
some say that op hasn't fully recovered to this day
 
My high school band director told us a story about how some student got so pissed off at him that he found a dead rat, placed it on his podium, opened it up, and stuck his baton in it (the school was having a rat problem at the time).

It was the end of my senior year, so of course senior pranks are happening (though I couldn’t take part in them). These “pranks” were all terrible. One example: I hear a bunch of people talking about a prank that was pulled down in the school’s basement. Because I had a class down there, I happened to see what it was. All it was was that someone killed a snake and poured its blood down the hallway.

My school was full of psychopaths.
 
I remember another story, this one from middle school. There was a special / disabled student named Bupo (pronounced Boo-Poh). He wore extremely thick goggle glasses that were always firmly strapped to his head, spoke very loudly out of his huge densely-packed mouth (he seemed to have more teeth than is usual), and was always deliriously happy. He was also impossibly muscled and strong for a person his age. He did not know his own strength and hurt several people because of it. He could do one arm pullups until the P.E. teacher would make him stop from fear of him harming or exhausting himself. For example.

Anyway. One day we're in the gym doing something, I don't remember, it involved mats. It was a long gym, with very high ceilings, but not very wide. Bupo somehow secured himself a football (a pigskin - or "American style" football) and is punting the ever-living shit out of it. His retard strength is propelling this thing hundreds of miles an hour, sending it ricocheting multiple times between walls of the narrow gym. It seems no one is really taking notice but me, as I was resting against a wall near the far corner, trying to get my gym shorts to stay on (I was a really skinny kid). Numerous times I watch Bupo's football narrowly miss another student's head, moving so quickly as to almost fool human perception. Meanwhile the students are blissfully jogging around, tumbling, whatever the fuck we were doing.

Just as I am about to raise my concerns to the instructor Bupo kicks the football so hard he falls down. I see the brown blur hurtle in a straight, uneering line towards Suzanne Rotten Crotch (as we called her, as she had helped me and many of my friends reach the promised land in our 13th or then 14th years). It sounds cliche, but time really did kind of slow down. I managed to open my mouth and force out a of squeak of alarm.

The football connected with Suzanne's calf with a sickening slap, so hard that she almost completed a full back flip, ending up sadly crumpling down into the gym floor in a weird, bent position. Bupo, witnessing the destruction he has wrought, immediately runs away towards the locker room. I suppose he wasn't able to process accidentally hurting someone. Everyone (aside from Suzanne, who was fuuuuucked up and crying) stood in silence and watched him barge through the locker room doors like the Incredible Hulk.
 
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