🐮 Lolcow Russell Greer / Mr. Green / Russell Greee / Russle / Brothel Prince / @ just_some_dude_named_russell29 / A Safer Nevada PAC - Swift-Obsessed Sex Pest, Convicted of E-Stalking, "Eggshell Skull Plaintiff" Pro Se Litigant, Homeless, aspiring brothel owner

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Hyacinth Bucket (Bouquet) said:
I am perhaps in the minority here in that I think Greer does have a serious, for-real, life-impacting disability. He can't speak clearly, which is a huge problem. A lot of jobs are just going to be out for him because he can't have a phone conversation.

For example, he would struggle as a lawyer. Sure he could Tard through law school with accommodations, but being able to speak smoothly and understandably is damned hard to work around. If he isn't some type of savant in a rarified solicitor field, it's going to be hard.
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I agree that he would struggle as a lawyer, but disagree as to why.

His speech impediment is exactly that, an impediment, but it's not impossible to work around. As AnOminous stated, most of the work of attorneys is done through writing, most lawyers don't actually set foot in a court room. If Russell was to be self-aware and recognize that A) he doesn't have to be physically in court to be an excellent attorney, and B) play into the fact that his ability to speak is impeded, so he should dedicate himself to being the best researcher and/or writer possible because he has to, he could find success as an attorney.

He would struggle as a lawyer because he's socially awkward and unpleasant to be around, and the probability of him acting inappropriately around women is almost 100%, so he's almost definitely a legal liability to have in the first place. He's also incapable of learning from his mistakes, he's unable to let go of arguments that have clearly been rejected and are unsound. He's a fucking idiot who consistently makes bad decisions, both personally and professionally, and whenever something goes wrong, it's always someone else's fault. He'd be the kind of person who makes promises he can't keep (I bet he'd be the kind of person to promise specific results to clients), and then gets himself into legal trouble for it.

Russell as someone with paralegal training has done most of the shit attorneys get in trouble for doing, and he's not even a fucking attorney. That's not even accounting for the likelihood that he'd fail any character and fitness evaluations, and his legal history would set off red flags in anyone who isn't a fucking retard. Russell does not come across as a person who is passionate about the law and justice, he comes across like a vindictive faggot who already punishes people with the legal process, but now wants a license and the education to use the law as a hammer to bludgeon people...you know, the exact kind of person who should never get the chance in the first place.

If the state isn't completely fucking retarded (and it's at least somewhat retarded, see Greer v. Moon), it'd kill his dreams at the beginning. And of course it'd be the Kiwi Farms fault.
 
I saw this on Facebook and promptly thought of our Brothel Prince.
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Maraschino said:
He would struggle as a lawyer because he's socially awkward and unpleasant to be around, and the probability of him acting inappropriately around women is almost 100%, so he's almost definitely a legal liability to have in the first place. He's also incapable of learning from his mistakes, he's unable to let go of arguments that have clearly been rejected and are unsound. He's a fucking idiot who consistently makes bad decisions, both personally and professionally, and whenever something goes wrong, it's always someone else's fault. He'd be the kind of person who makes promises he can't keep (I bet he'd be the kind of person to promise specific results to clients), and then gets himself into legal trouble for it.
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A few more problems to add:

* Most big and even mid-sized metros have more than enough attorneys to go around. Even if a firm has a large # of vacancies to fill it will get better applicants than Russ.
* If he can't interact with clients directly, he had better be good enough on the research/writing side that higher-ups wouldn't want to take him off it in the first place. He is not that good.
* He'd use company time for his personal lawsuits and might even be dumb enough to try billing a client for it.
* He might refuse to represent clients/push their preferred arguments because he disagrees with them. Not in the sense of 'this is a bad idea' or 'I'm not doing this because I could get disbarred', he's too stubborn to consider others' perspectives and too attached to his own kooky principles to do something that even * might * be seen as opposing them. ETA: From what others brought up in one of the assorted lolsuit threads, attorneys are supposed to go along with what the client wants so long as it complies with Bar/court rules. Even if they think the client's idea is unwise they are only expected to tell the client why it is a bad idea and s/he should reconsider.

The solution to the above would be to start his own firm . . . but the only way to get people to overlook everything you pointed out would be to offer ultra-low rates. Even then it would only last a few months, maybe a year or two, before word of his bad behavior + incompetence sunk him. Same for practicing in an exurban/rural areas with barely enough attorneys to go around, word still gets around and the # of prospective clients is much smaller.
 
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The real problem with russ being a lawyer is that he wouldn't do it to get a job, or do it because he wants to do it (I'm sure he could be a successful title attorney or some paper-pushing shit nobody ever has to interact with) - he would ONLY become a lawyer to get him his penis sucked.

Which is why it's doomed to failure. At least the lawyers who do it for the money can orient toward the money; but Russ is too direct and since he can't stop forcing his brothel dreams on workers for five seconds to keep his fucking job, or not creep on his landlord's sister to keep his fucking house, he'd never be able to even approach the bar, let alone pass it.
 
I can stomach speculation about Russ terrorizing a homeless camp of spun-out grandmas, setting fire to forests, violating corpses, potentially living under ground with Vegas Mole People, trying to start his own whore stables, filing lawsuits in triplicate while attending university for hospitality management WHILE studying for the LSAT as a freshman/sophomore in an unrelated major ... but any entertainment of him ever practicing law in any capacity is a bridge too far.

There's probably a lot more but he's such an unreliable narrator and the truth of his exploits comes spilling out way after the fact in public record I've lost track.
 
Russell could never be a lawyer long term because he can't concentrate on anything that isn't directly related to him getting him penis sucked. Russell would take forever to complete tasks and those tasks would be very poorly done.

He is so sex crazed, he needs jobs that require little thinking, like the scanning job he has just lost.
 
Greer should leverage what Jesus and Godbear gave him and just work for a haunted house. There's a year round one in in Vegas and all he'd have to do is throw on a scar prosthetic and some fake blood. He'd fit right in and get the chance to touch women without their consent. Plus whatever women work there have a higher chance of being into banging someone with a fucked up face, probably. I don't know if that applies to all haunted houses but it probably does in Vegas.
 
FamicomGorby said:
a scar prosthetic and some fake blood
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It'd be an improvement.

Like he wasn't born hideous inside and out. His facial deformities, slow-in-the-mind mental acumen, slurred speech impediment, fucked up eyes, awkward gait and epileptic dance performances could all be explained by some horrific car accident in his past.
 
FamicomGorby said:
Greer should leverage what Jesus and Godbear gave him and just work for a haunted house. There's a year round one in in Vegas and all he'd have to do is throw on a scar prosthetic and some fake blood. He'd fit right in and get the chance to touch women without their consent. Plus whatever women work there have a higher chance of being into banging someone with a fucked up face, probably. I don't know if that applies to all haunted houses but it probably does in Vegas.
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Greer was indeed born in the wrong era. He would have been perfect in a freakshow.

"Feast your eyes, ladies and gentlemen, he's so ugly he gives whores nightmares, the revolting Drooping Drool Face!!!"
 
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[Transplanted from the case thread, not that it's much more on-topic here.]
reptile baht spaniard rid said:
Because it takes a special skill to be able to transcribe that fast, and is basically a college degree, and you start at like $40k a year.
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That's way on the low entry-level scale maybe in a rural area. It can get well over $100,000 a year.
reptile baht spaniard rid said:
It’s not as horrible as all that anymore as they almost always record for the stenographer to doublecheck/transcribe later, but if you can’t do it first time you’re going to quickly be working overtime at home for no pay.
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There are services like Veritext that do realtime transcripts with live feeds and have clickable indexes with every word in the transcript. Needless to say this is very expensive.

Also you're technically not a stenographer if you are doing it from a recording using a normal keyboard. A stenographer uses a special machine and is actually physically in court. This is increasingly uncommon, though.
 
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