🍗 Deathfat Anna o' Brien / Glitter + Lazers / GlitterandLazers - Fat, drunk, consoomer attention whore who would rather eat and drink herself to death than endure a single negative emotion

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autoerotic bus accident said:
could you theoretically lift half of your own body weight?
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Yeah, I think I could , although I’m short and it wouldn’t be something I could carry for long and I’d want to be careful. Those big bags of compost you get from the garden centre weigh loads when they’re wet, and I can lift and carry them ok if I’m careful and hold it right . My wrists aren’t so strong so I might struggle a bit with a bar but I reckon I could lift half my weight in a pinch.
 
I discovered Anna before this thread actually. Was scrolling tiktok and she made a video dressed up like Brittany Spears. Could not believe my eyes when I saw how big she was. And only a handful of weeks later, someone on the farms made a thread on her.

Looking back on that Brittany Spears video, she looks pretty thin compared to now, holy shit. Here's to another year of Anna! She's my first and favorite cow
 
just lurking said:
I discovered Anna before this thread actually. Was scrolling tiktok and she made a video dressed up like Brittany Spears. Could not believe my eyes when I saw how big she was. And only a handful of weeks later, someone on the farms made a thread on her.

Looking back on that Brittany Spears video, she looks pretty thin compared to now, holy shit. Here's to another year of Anna! She's my first and favorite cow
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Since it's a time of reflection (happy new year farmers!) and Anna is pretty quiet I'll just add that my OG account has some Anna posts pre this thread that are still worth revisiting if you're bored.
 
Further Adventures in Planking:

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Omfg just do the planks, you don't have to write an essay about it each time.

And all her little caption comments on the video. It is NOT normal or healthy to look at yourself and think about yourself this much. Go do a crossword puzzle or something.
 
"I felt shocks up my arms..." Because you were not planking. You were just proping yourself up while humping the air with your bison ass.

omg could you imagine being in the gym and seeing someone do this?
 
The other influencers in her building must have some absolutely incredible sneak footage of her, that they can't do anything with because both Anna and the building's management would retaliate by sending an entire shiver of lawyers after them. I wouldn't be surprised that when Anna finally horse-kicks the bucket, some truly spectacular images finally make it to the clearnet.
 
autoerotic bus accident said:
Her lifts can look impressive because of the size of the weights, but they aren't.

You can't lift 185lb, but could you theoretically lift half of your own body weight? If you can, congratulations, you've met the traditional benchmark for a beginner deadlifter. But Anna has not.

A bodyweight ratio of 0.5 percent is the "beginner" benchmark, and she isn't even hitting that. Her 185lb lift would be beginner level for a 370 pound woman, novice level for a 185 pound woman, and intermediate level for a 150 pound woman.

If we estimate Anna at a conservative 550lb, her benchmark as a typical beginner would be 275lb. She isn't even close to that. Right now she is lifting 0.3 and she can't even do that correctly. She is putting herself in harm's way for short-term imaginary clout instead of doing anything that could actually benefit her.

There's another method of calculating your lifting proficiency called the Wilks coefficient, but the first calculator I found topped out at 400lb.
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Someone has proposed a better way to calculate Wilks coefficient because it actually favors the super-fat. Their calculator goes above 400lb for Wilks and their proposed formula: https://peidiwu.com/a-better-wilks-formula/ (it has a certificate error, but you can proceed with caution).

Archive but the calculator doesn't work: https://archive.ph/jvIwH

I am being generous by assuming Anna is 525lb, but I am basing her total on a 200lb predicted 1RM of her real deadlift (not the gunt-assisted elevated lifts), 140lb bench press, and 155lb squat. I might be off on those numbers by +/- 10lb. But it doesn't matter. She has a negative Wilks.

Tl;dr: this is awful even for a beginner. It's nearly impossible to have a negative Wilks coefficient as a normal-sized person unless you're recovering from some muscle-wasting disease and can't pick up the bar. If you're 150lb and able to deadlift/squat/bench the bar (45lb), your Wilks is 62.1.

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OttoWest said:
Further Adventures in Planking:
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... I am confused.

Where's the plank?

There was no plank to be seen.

For reference, if you shimmy/shake/move/exit a straight line while doing a plank for the Physical Fitness Test in the military, your time is taken and you're done. She didn't even make it 3 seconds.

BRAVO, ANNA. (slowest, most sarcastic clapping ever here, please)
 
xivnuhranx said:
Tl;dr: this is awful even for a beginner. It's nearly impossible to have a negative Wilks coefficient as a normal-sized person unless you're recovering from some muscle-wasting disease and can't pick up the bar. If you're 150lb and able to deadlift/squat/bench the bar (45lb), your Wilks is 62.1.
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I wonder how long she was on GLP1s for? I only recently found out they absolutely wreck muscle mass - some studies estimate up to 40% of the weight loss comes from muscle mass. That sounds fucking horrible. Apparently there’s a new drug they are testing to combine with GLP1s to preserve muscle mass but it seems doing daily fork-downs is still the superior weight control methods.
 
Apologies in advance if the format or photos are weird, I’m a mobile fag so had to screenshot and crop lol
She posted on her glitter account on instagram today- caption says:
This year I am focused on being more, versus less 💕

Whatever that means lol
Here’s the photo dump (there’s so many :'()

Also to have these mostly staged instagram photos as the highlights of your year, that’s pretty sad lol

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duckling said:
I wonder how long she was on GLP1s for? I only recently found out they absolutely wreck muscle mass - some studies estimate up to 40% of the weight loss comes from muscle mass. That sounds fucking horrible. Apparently there’s a new drug they are testing to combine with GLP1s to preserve muscle mass but it seems doing daily fork-downs is still the superior weight control methods.
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There’s no free lunch
 
Gush gurds said:
Apologies in advance if the format or photos are weird, I’m a mobile fag so had to screenshot and crop lol
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Also a mobile fag so I can't respond precisely to an image that I want to reply to but: as for the "More me time" pic- Anna has nothing but said "me time". Random long vacations in the middle of the year? Tard school level arts and crafts? It's all Anna time, as she has no normal adult obligations an experiences
 
I love that she posted "more finished projects" beneath a project that she did no trimming/finishing on!

In fact, has she ever so much as hot-glued a hem?
 
How sad that in every picture, she’s alone. I mean, not really that sad because she’s an annoying potato who no one wants to be around. But to showcase your goals (I guess yay for more puzzles while standing at your kitchen island?? Way to reach for the sky there, Anna) and it’s all just solo shots with her mouth wide open for no reason, performing for her tripod or Jon.
What a lame life for a 41 year old.
 
Gush gurds said:
She posted on her glitter account on instagram today- caption says:
This year I am focused on being more, versus less 💕
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This all really gives great insight into Anna’s cheesy, stupid, and unfortunately common way of thinking.

She just has a hatred of the word “less”. Very simplistic thinking that more = good, less = bad. So someone having a resolution to drink less alcohol or spend less money or (500 lb. Anna gorilla in the room) EAT LESS FOOD is somehow doing something wrong and bad. I know people like this, who hate it when any sentence has a negative word like no, hate, less etc in it and they think you’ve committed some moral crime if you utter these words. None of them were actually nice! All were two-faced.

Second, she is trying to delude herself into thinking once again that she is special over other people. She’s special because she’s not like other Resolution-Havers! But sadly for Anna, it’s very common for people to have New Year’s resolutions that focus on doing more of something. Going to gym more often and reading more books have to be the most common!

I will give Anna a little credit - that plank was NOT a plank but she still has better mobility than you’d expect from her mammoth size. I can’t imagine the other deathfats attempting that maneuver without falling and crying - their exercise arcs tend to consist of them getting out of breath walking outside in their neighborhood once or twice.

The title of the thread really gets it right, Anna would rather eat more more MORE rather than endure a negative emotion. But if she could just eat less, she might actually get her health together better than some of the other fatties. She has a really limited time to do this though, people this size don’t really make it past 50. She could make content about going to counseling for her food issues, but she seems like she wants to avoid looking at that part of herself at any cost.
 
She is so shallow a bromeliad could survive on her.

More fashion, more vibes, more dilly dallying, more IRL moments?

More self, more me, more unapologetically me?

What does any of that even mean? Aside from the fact that the only person she thinks about is herself?

I’d venture a guess and that many of us, if forced at gunpoint to make such a list, would say more time with family or friends, visiting a far-away loved one, maybe more sex with a partner, more volunteering, more friendships, mastering a new skill, more work-life balance.

Who would say more fangirling? More dancing? More vibes? We know she doesn’t mean going out to a club to dance or taking a line dancing class or whatever. No, she means making crazy open mouth faces while her enormous belly gunts up and down and her legs wobble while Jon films.

This woman is in her 40s and not a single thing on the list mentioned another person.

The only thing she said that had meaning was more walks with Data. She’s probably not even walking her dog once a day, which is a shame for the poor animal, and I doubt anything will change. I hope she is at least paying for the service. Dogs love going on pack walks with their owner but barring that, they still need to get out

After seeing her bizarre plank video, I honestly think she’s the most delusional cow in the beauty parlor, and she’s incapable of having an “IRL moment.”
 
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