The charming man I met on a dating app turned into a jealous monster who tried to drown me in the bath - Warning: This article contains images of injuries some may find distressing

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Link: https://www.walesonline.co.uk/news/wales-news/charming-man-met-dating-app-33012456
Credit: Jane Cohen, Wales Online, 04:00, 07 Dec 2025
Archive: https://archive.ph/wip/xycys

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Katie Yates and her attacker Jason Smith who is serving 15 years in prison

When Katie Yates signed up to a dating app for the first time after a painful divorce she was looking for a little fun and companionship. And when charming Jason Smith sent her a message, he seemed like the sort of gentle giant who could help the mum-of-two smile again.

But his flattery and charm were all lies and once he’d got his foot in the door, he subjected terrified Katie to months of physical and mental abuse before raping and attempting to drown her just days before Christmas.

Now Katie, 42, from Cardiff, is bravely waiving her anonymity as a victim of sexual assault to warn other women to be wary about the strangers they meet on dating apps who may be posing as nice guy in an attempt to lure them in.

“You scroll on all the profiles with smiling photos and slick words, but there are some people who should be looking for a therapist not a girlfriend,” she says.

“Jason, then 29, was handsome and very charming but underneath the smiles he was a violent rapist who loved to be cruel.

“For ten months, my life was a living hell. It’s made me think twice about every going on a dating app ever again.

“I am lucky to be alive. It’s taken a long time to rebuild my life.”

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He came across as charming to begin with

Katie had been single for five years when she signed up to Plenty of Fish in February 2018, at the urging of her loved ones.

“I was 35 and a single mum of two. I’d been through a bitter divorce in 2013 and men had been at the bottom of my agenda,” she explains. “My priority had been my children and I’d just focused on their needs.

“But friends and family told me it was time to find myself a boyfriend and I realised how lonely I’d actually been.”

As she scrolled through the profiles, a message popped up from Jason Smith, a railway maintenance worker.

“He seemed so warm and friendly – like a gentle giant. He told me he had a child and loved being a dad. It was a bonus he was handsome, too.

“He complimented me and he asked me lots of questions, like he really wanted to know everything about me.”

Katie, who was a trainee hairdresser at the time, was flattered by the attention and soon messages were pinging back and forth, until Jason asked her to meet him in a local Wetherspoons in his hometown of Pontypridd, South Wales.

“He greeted me with a big smile and he had the brightest blue eyes. He was incredibly charming with an infectious demeanour,” Katie recalls.

“We sipped coffee and the conversation flowed. He asked about my children and my divorce and he said he’d been single for a while.

“I wanted to be open and honest, so I explained I’d had some difficult health problems and had been through several surgeries.

“But whatever I said didn’t put him off and in those first few weeks, Jason showered me with attention and compliments.

“We’d talk for hours about everything. I even introduced him to my children.

“I felt so lucky, I believed Jason was a real catch. I honestly wondered why he hadn’t been snapped up already.”

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Katie felt so 'lucky' to begin with

But just weeks into their relationship, Jason turned up at Katie’s house, extremely stressed and agitated.

“He told me he’d had a big falling out with his landlord and had to move out immediately,” Katie says.

“He asked if he could stay with me for a bit, just until he got a new place sorted.

“I wasn’t ready for things to progress that quickly. But he was very persuasive and sounded so desperate that I agreed he could stay temporarily.

“He promised he would cook and clean for me and I wouldn’t regret it.”

Jason moved into Katie’s two bedroomed house – and for the first few weeks, he kept to his word. But then he dropped a bombshell and confessed that he was unemployed.

“Being a single mother and a student, I worried about bills and paying my way, but Jason reassured me he’d get a job soon,” Katie says.

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Katie now

But as days turned into weeks, Jason’s behaviour began to change dramatically.

“Jason began accusing me of fancying everyone in sight,” Katie says.

“One day he put his hands around my neck and strangled me until I passed out, after accusing me of fancying some random stranger. It was all pure fantasy in his head.”

Katie was shaken up but Jason begged for forgiveness and another chance. It wasn’t long though before the abuse continued.

“On a trip to the chippy, we got back to the car and Jason tipped a whole pot of gravy over my head and punched me,” Katie recalls.

“’That’s for looking at the guy behind the counter,’ he’d snarled at me. ‘You fancied him, didn’t you?'”

Now terrified of her dating app beau, who she realised also had a drink problem, Katie knew she had to end things but struggled to break free.

“If I went to see my parents, he’d demand to know why I was so long and accuse me of seeing someone else,” she says.

“His constant accusations wore me down and I slowly became isolated from my family.

“One day he called me 70 times and demanded for me to video call so he could see exactly where I was.

“He also became more cruel, telling me his ex-girlfriend was much more beautiful than I was. He enjoyed seeing me upset.”

Katie says that Jason never had any money to help towards the bills and she was struggling as a single parent to make ends meet.

“One time I found out he’d stolen money out of my child’s birthday cards that had been posted through the door,” she says.

“I got so used to wearing sunglasses. too, to hide my black eyes.

“I remember one day looking in the mirror and I barely recognised myself. I’d become so thin and fragile with the stress. I even had to give up my hairdressing course because I couldn’t concentrate on anything.”

Then on December 18, 2018, a trip to a holiday park in West Wales ended in disaster with Jason losing his temper and being removed by security staff.

“It was meant to be a break but it turned into a nightmare. He drank a bottle of whisky when we got there and became really angry for no reason at all,” Katie says.

“He ripped up all my clothes and the children’s toy elves.

“When we eventually got home, he came into the bedroom, pinned me down and raped me. I begged him to stop but he wouldn’t and told me I deserved it," she says.

“I looked into his eyes and they were dead. All I could see was anger and hatred.”

Four days later, terrified Katie was in the bath when Jason grabbed her head, pushed it under the water and held it there.

“He was so strong, my legs splashed frantically in the water. I thought he was going to drown me and I was going to die that moment,” she recalls.

“Finally, he released me as I spluttered and coughed, frantic for breath before he dunked my head under again.”

Jason’s ferocious attack was because he claimed Katie had been eyeing up staff in Sainsbury’s while they did their food shop.

“After he’d finished, I’d just sat in the bath, shaking and trembling, too terrified to even move,” she says.

Things finally came to a head when the following day, Jason beat Katie so badly, she thought she was going to die.

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Katie's dad didn't recognise her after the attack

Thankfully, her children were not in the house at the time.

In fear for her life, Katie contacted her parents.

“My dad drove to my house and didn’t recognise me when he saw me. I looked like something out a Halloween movie,” she says.

“When my mum saw me, she broke down and was white with shock.”

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Katie's mum broke down when she saw her daughter


Katie bravely contacted the police and told them everything. Jason was arrested but denied all charges and went on trial at Newport Crown Court in June 2019.

“I was still terrified of him. Seeing in that court room smirking was awful,” Katie says.

“But I found a strength inside of me and I knew I had to speak out against this terrible man who had horrifically abused me.”

Thankfully the jury believed Katie and found her ex-boyfriend guilty of rape, assault occasioning actual bodily harm and assault by beating.

He was jailed for 15 years and was given a restraining order for ten years.

“I’m glad he is in jail. He has time to sit and think about what he did, but I doubt he’s sorry,” Katie says.

“I still suffer terrible flashbacks and nightmares from the abuse put me through though.”

Unfortunately for her, her abusive ex is eligible for parole in 2027 and Katie is terrified he will try to find her when he is out.

“I believe he will come looking for me and that really frightens me, but I don’t regret speaking out – he was a danger to women,” Katie says.

“I thought I’d struck lucky when I met Jason, but I’d invited a monster into my life.”
 
Dating Apps are tools for retards.
Wanna meet real people? Go out with friends, meet new people.
Offers you the collective intelligence of a group to help you sort out bad apples and backup if they are weird.

Dating Apps are FUCKING without attachment Apps, nothing more, nothing less.
While I agree dating apps are a crime against humanity, back in the long ago times before silicon, meeting people and vetting them with friends and family led to domestic violence outcomes approaching biblical levels of frequency.

Shit passes through a sifter as easily as gold as long as the size is right. (I just realized I got the function of a sifter exactly wrong, but I'll be fucked before fixing my analogy)
 
back in the long ago times before silicon, meeting people and vetting them with friends and family led to domestic violence outcomes approaching biblical levels of frequency.
Is this actually true? I'm not even saying it isn't but it seems very unintuitive. Random people you meet online are safer than people vetted by your friends and family?
 
Hmm.

View attachment 8260566

Hasn't posted in a while. I wonder why.

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Hmmmmmmm.

1000053330-png.8260564


Oh dear. Died young on the very same day she was publicly mocking someone for not trusting The Science. That's a shame.
I had forgot she existed before this thread. She's one of those anti-car bike nonce types. She'd constantly tweet about getting sexually assaulted on London buses but would never describe the attacker. I'm honestly surprised she is still alive. Isn't she also really fat despite claiming to cycle everywhere?

EDIT: She's fat! She's dead!
 
>Dating app
>Younger man
>Single mother

Chick was doomed from the start.

Also, I kinda hate mothers who expose their children to this shit and do nothing to stop it until well into the abuse. Just watching their mother be abused is abusive to the children. Imo, if you become single as a parent, you should stay single until your children are grown.

I really hope she's fully prepared for him to try and kill her when he's out, it's more likely than not that will be the case.
Too bad she lives in a country where you can't arm yourself.

Sadly, father issues coupled with single motherhood seems to turn this ability off and and thy will insist, whilst sporting a black eye, her man is just fine just as he steps out of her daughter's bedroom whilst he's zipping up his fly.
Basically. I've known a lot of women who will go out of their way to overlook red flags and excuse bad behaviors, and then get aggressive with their female friends* who suggest they break it off.

*Most female friends will just quietly drift away from that woman because they don't want to be around her obnoxious and scary boyfriend, but occasionally some like myself will say something and then get treated like we're the unreasonable ones.
 
Also, I kinda hate mothers who expose their children to this shit and do nothing to stop it until well into the abuse. Just watching their mother be abused is abusive to the children. Imo, if you become single as a parent, you should stay single until your children are grown.
PL but I’ve had a relationship with a woman who had an abusive father and never again. Fortunately it was when I was young.

She now has a string of kids via a bunch of abusive men and I’m so lucky to have dodged a bullet there.

No doubt though that cycle will continue when her kids grow up.

Not saying that a woman with a violent father/previous partner should always be taken as a red flag, but when it’s a big part of her identity run like fuck, lads.

You can’t fix her.
 
meeting people and vetting them with friends and family led to domestic violence outcomes approaching biblical levels of frequency
Domestic violence existed before the Internet. People are retards.
My point was that actually meeting people in an environment where you can learn about them through others, thereby finding out about their dating history, their personality and having the option to find out about redflags that internet-dating will largely obscure thanks to the medium, remains a better way to meet potential long-term dating, or even one-night-stand prospects.

Being creepy without being flagged as creepy is a lot easier when the contact medium is a dating app. The real creeps often do not have actual friends that go out with them, or are unlikely to be introduced by your own good friends.

I can say from personal experience that good friends will often rather take someone aside and tell them to NOT date someone, even they consider that person part of their extended friendgroup. (I had one such friend that we would always tell the girls he hit on to NOT go out with. He was a disaster in relationships, but a good guy when single)

That is why I believe online dating and dating apps are a poor medium and it makes it significantly easier for creeps to scout their marks, change their behavior and personality to become a match, then seduce them and lie to them using the information gathered from online stalking (thank you Facebook).

Yes, violence has existed before the internet, but dating apps and online dating have made it significantly easier to the skilled predator to find victims.
 
They seek it out on some subconscious level, a girl growing up in a household where the dad is a violent piece of shit is something like 6x more likely to experience DV. And if they leave they're 9x more likely to get into another relationship where the dude is a violent piece of shit.
That's because they choose partners they believe will be more violent and intimidating than their exes.
 
What is the origin of this? I see people saying similar things all the time. It's obviously a reference but I don't know to what.
It's a Kino Casino thing, their humor is all about extreme a-logging so they tend to take fairly innocuous and common flaws and SCREAM them out. She's FAT! It's so cheap that it became an in-joke on the show and is now basically a self-sustaining meme. You can say it for anything bad that happens to anyone.
 
My point was that actually meeting people in an environment where you can learn about them through others, thereby finding out about their dating history, their personality and having the option to find out about redflags that internet-dating will largely obscure thanks to the medium, remains a better way to meet potential long-term dating, or even one-night-stand prospects.

Being creepy without being flagged as creepy is a lot easier when the contact medium is a dating app. The real creeps often do not have actual friends that go out with them, or are unlikely to be introduced by your own good friends.

I can say from personal experience that good friends will often rather take someone aside and tell them to NOT date someone, even they consider that person part of their extended friendgroup. (I had one such friend that we would always tell the girls he hit on to NOT go out with. He was a disaster in relationships, but a good guy when single)

That is why I believe online dating and dating apps are a poor medium and it makes it significantly easier for creeps to scout their marks, change their behavior and personality to become a match, then seduce them and lie to them using the information gathered from online stalking (thank you Facebook).

Yes, violence has existed before the internet, but dating apps and online dating have made it significantly easier to the skilled predator to find victims.
People are absolute retards who have blind spots for their friends and family. Take a look at the streamed parole hearings, you'll have serial sex offenders happily being taken in by their families if they are released, who will also be saying that the victims were lying or some 9 year old who had all of her holes stretched out was asking for it.


What is the origin of this? I see people saying similar things all the time. It's obviously a reference but I don't know to what.
Kino Kasino.
 
What I don't get about these fucking lunatic type guys ("she's cheating on me she's cheating on me she's cheating on me") is why the FUCK do you keep getting in relationships if you know you're just gonna be paranoid about them 24/7? Like, how can you fucking not be tired of this shit?
See, you say this because you're operating from a healthy mindset.

It doesn't make sense to you because you were raised with the ability to understand healthy vs. not healthy.

When the only thing you understand is co-dependence (and you probably don't have things like hobbies and careers to fall back on for the healthy but non-romantic relationships you absolutely need to re-create a relationship to have something to hold onto.

They might not want the abuse, but they absolutely need the relationship.
 
My point was that actually meeting people in an environment where you can learn about them through others, thereby finding out about their dating history, their personality and having the option to find out about redflags that internet-dating will largely obscure thanks to the medium, remains a better way to meet potential long-term dating, or even one-night-stand prospects.

Being creepy without being flagged as creepy is a lot easier when the contact medium is a dating app. The real creeps often do not have actual friends that go out with them, or are unlikely to be introduced by your own good friends.

I can say from personal experience that good friends will often rather take someone aside and tell them to NOT date someone, even they consider that person part of their extended friendgroup. (I had one such friend that we would always tell the girls he hit on to NOT go out with. He was a disaster in relationships, but a good guy when single)

Whole reason online dating became so popular is because people are retards especially your friends & family group. This reads like spending your life around people you went to high school with, living in the same place forever so you can know everything about everyone and your entire romantic life being dictated by feminine gossip and mixed company backbiting.

Outside of clickbait and Lifetime specials many killers and people that warranted worrying about had huge friend groups and are quite popular & charming.

Most people have no idea what NPD or BPD is or entails this whole vetting thing shows a huge unwarranted level of confidence in yourself and the people you hang around with and it takes zero effort to exploit that.
 
It's a Kino Casino thing, their humor is all about extreme a-logging so they tend to take fairly innocuous and common flaws and SCREAM them out. She's FAT! It's so cheap that it became an in-joke on the show and is now basically a self-sustaining meme. You can say it for anything bad that happens to anyone.
Kino Kasino.
Kino Kasino got it from Scott Steiner:
 
Shit like this makes me feel ok about being an unfuckable hate nerd. This sort of shit is always in the back of women's minds. In the USA teen girls as young as 14 often lose their virginity to forcible rape. Then it continues...on and on thru HS...then college...then employment and internet dating. After the 9th or 10th forced rape and being beat to shit so many times that they have faces that resemble the Elephant Man, they simply start buying cats. It's too bad that not only do women assume that every man has blood in his eye, more often than not that assumption is correct. Every guy they meet is wonderful until he's not, and the relationship ends in a purple hued woman with blood dripping out of her vagina desperately running down the street trying to escape her once perfect man bellowing I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU BITCH!!!! I don't bitch online about women hating me, they have a fucking damn good reason to hate all men.
 
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