📚 Megathread Trannies posting their L's Online - Heckin valid people posting their funny misfortunes on the internet

[Magic Pickle]

A pooner with a preoccupation with her packer is put in a pickle when people have to poke her pretend-penis in public. Try saying that several times fast!
Link | Archive

Dealing with getting touched inappropriately at TSA​

CW: inappropriate touching, bottom dysphoria
I wear a packet 24-7. I feel so wrong without it. For many years I was able to get through the airport just fine with wearing one through security but ever since this year it’s changed.
Everytime I step into that machine it flags me down and security is like “woah buddy” and then asking me incredibly inappropriate questions. “What’s truly in your pants?” I typically say “um my dick?” and then they proceed to have to pat me down in front of everyone.
I’m stealth and in this current political climate I’m not comfortable parading around and telling the world I’m transgender especially to a security guard that may not have the best reaction. I hate physical touch already so this just upsets and angers me. I’m just trying to travel and get to my flight not be embarrassed and shamed in front of everyone.
I just hate how much hurdles I have to go through as a transgender man. I just want to get on my flight why is that so difficult?

Green-eyed manster: a TiM felt that Buffalo Billish desire to wear a female roommate's skin, and ever since he told her that he longs to live a life like hers, they haven't really spoken much since. As always, OP doesn't realize what he said was - at best - pathetic and - at worst - very, very creepy.
Link | Archive

Jealous of my cis friend​

TW for depression and dysphoria
I am jealous of my ex house mate.
We haven't seen each other in over a year but it still plagues my mind
I used to live with her and her boyfriend and 2 other guys and in that time I realized she was living the life I wish I had, she was at uni, she got to have a boyfriend who she got to wake up next to, cook with, he took her on cute dates and got her flowers, I was there when they met in a bar, they're still together now and I think that's wonderful, but
The more I was around them the more depressed I got and eventually we drifted, I ended up moving out and going on a repression adventure which evidently failed but it still pops up in my mind, what I've lost, what I will never have, the right childhood, the acceptance, the ability to be not just desired but also loved, not seen as a kink or someone's fantasy but as someone that can be considered to be in someone else's future
I expressed this to her when she asked why I had been so distant and I was at quite the low point, I had tried tinder and was sick of the guys in my inbox telling me that we could "go on a date but not anywhere local in case anyone saw us" or simply asking to fuck to fufil a fantasy of theirs.
She understood but was hurt, which was more than fair but we haven't really spoken since then other than the odd message
I haven't really had any friends like them since
Idk it's late, I shouldnt be so petty tbh

Leonardo da Bitchy: a TiF is upset that what's most commonplace as a depiction for FTMs is drawing them, essentially, as women, without realizing that the only people who even give a shit enough to draw FTMs in the first place is... well, other FTMs (and theyfabs, can't forget ourselves the theyfabs). Take it up with the "boys" in your hood if it's so upsetting to you, perhaps?
Link | Archive

I hate how we are drawn​

I think I’ve written, and rewritten this post about 4 times now. Part of me wants to post it in the main sub cuz it’s bigger but I’m scared I can’t help but be venty so in here it goes I guess. Maybe it’s for the best if people don’t read this. It’s gonna be rambley and incoherent most likely because I’m having a bad OCD spiral.
I really hate coming across art of trans men and they aren’t drawn as men. They’re drawn basically as woman. Saw a drawing somebody did of a character where he had massive tits, a dress and a skirt. It’s fine if you’re drawing a femboy as long as you don’t forget the BOY part. Made me feel super crummy. For context I have bad chest dyphoria, like so intense that the other day I got excited cuz I thought I had breast cancer. Turned out to just be an abcess. My therapist says that I pass to everybody but myself and it’s true. I have a full beard and nobody has even mistaken me for a girl in years. And yet when I look in the mirror that’s all I see.
I feel like there’s something wrong with me for how badly this art effected me. Is this how I’m seen? When people learn I’m trans do I stop being a man in their eyes? My best friend is a hyper feminine he/ him lesbian (in his words he uses those pronouns cuz he likes the aesthetic and likened It to Walmart and wine aunt vibes which made me a little sick frankly), and he sent me a pic of his manipedi recently. I didn’t know how tf to respond to that. If he didn’t know I was trans I don’t think he would’ve sent me that, cuz that’s what girls send to girlfriends, not guy friends.
Idk this probably makes 0 sense and I probably shouldn’t post it but I- I don’t trust anybody in my life to talk to about this frankly. All my friends are either too deep into queer culture and would get upset or are cishet. I just- need to know I’m not crazy.

You ever notice how troons 'n' poons write about random shit in the most caterwauling, pathetically tragic way possible? OP, if your biggest problem in childhood was having to wear fucking skirts - and you weren't even beaten, tormented or abused for any sort of gender nonconformity - you've lived a pretty charmed life. Be grateful for how much worse it could've been, knowing what other women and girls deal with globally.
Link | Archive

I hate how we're just meant to *tolerate* the psychological torture of dysphoria​

In The Handmaid's Tale, they punished male dissenters by forcing them to wear dresses as psychological torture. Meanwhile, I had to wear a skirt every single day for years at school. The mental agony was constant and hard to focus on class through, but I just had to deal with it. If a cis boy were forced into dresses for eight hours daily, you'd never hear the end of how painful it was but because I'm trans, oh well, suck it up.
Forcing men to go on estrogen is considered immense, debilitating, dehumanising torture. But trans men go through years if not decades of that when they're pre-transition. My physical dysphoria is so bad there are days when I just lie in bed trying to move as little as possible so I forget about my body. It genuinely feels like a monstrous, contorted thing that I'm stuck inside. Meanwhile medical transition is getting banned left & right by cis male politicians who'd sure hate it if we forced them on estrogen.
Sorry for the vent. I guess I'm just mad that a cis male classmate talked about how his mom didn't let him play with a Barbie once and gave in after a very small argument, and my teacher instantly felt horrible, showered him with sympathy, asked if he was okay and if he knew he could express himself in this classroom. Meanwhile I sat squirming in my skirt, raised my hand, and talked about being forced into dresses. And the teacher was just like "yeah that happens sometimes" and moved right on. Sorry about this vent but I have no one else to talk to. Man I hate being trans.

Lastly, OP doesn't realize that he's posting an L when posts this to r/Transgender_Surgeries, but it is an L nonetheless: Handsome Squidward wants to know what his FFS options are.
Link | Archive

Is there hope for me? (FFS)​

I’m transitioning MTF and have been on hormones for almost two years. I feel hopeless and disappointed overall because I still look very masculine. Before I started transitioning, I had such high hopes for how things would turn out, but now I’m starting to realize that I might not live up to those expectations, not even slightly. It feels devastating.

For the longest time, I’ve dreamed of getting FFS, but what I’ve noticed is that the people who tend to have great results already looked very feminine to begin with. Given the masculine features I currently have, I’m starting to worry that I’ll be let down again.

One major concern I have is that my face appears wider than most people’s, even including most men. I also have a large nose, which I really hate. Along with that, I feel like I’m missing a lot of feminine features that could help me feel more confident and comfortable in my body, and it makes me worry that no amount of transitioning or surgery will ever help me pass the way I hoped I would.

Anyway, I thought I’d include some pictures to see if I could get some feedback.

Spoiler: Can you spot the difference?

 

[Stan]

Also if your transition goals are to be a femboy you are 100% a coomer, no one that interacts with that fucking cursed community isn't, every last one of them have been exposed to porn a decade too early. And since when is wearing boxers a male only thing? The fucking hottest underwear a woman can wear are boyshorts which are basically the same thing aside from smaller because women don't need space for their giant cocks.

Just like, nobody can see your underwear if you know how to dress yourself right so why worry about comments?

A pooner with a preoccupation with her packer is put in a pickle when people have to poke her pretend-penis in public. Try saying that several times fast!

Why is not wearing your packer through the security line not an option? Just pack it in your damn carry on and put it on AFTER screening. How hard is that...?

Lastly, OP doesn't realize that he's posting an L when posts this to r/Transgender_Surgeries, but it is an L nonetheless: Handsome Squidward wants to know what his FFS options are.

His options are: don't do it! That'll save him some time, pain, money and grief.

 

[femboy fart huffer]

and you weren't even beaten, tormented or abused for any sort of gender nonconformity

They didn't need to say that wearing skirts was the worst part of their childhood. You can fucking tell that they were never bullied with how absolutely fucking obnoxious they sound. I genuinely do not think I have ever heard a more sheltered faggot in my life Jesus fuck.

 

[JED]

Bigfoot blues: a troon tries to squeeze his clodhoppers into some eensie-weensie-women's shoes, only for his mother to put him on blast in front of his brother and uncle about how Chinese foot-binding via cheap-ass Payless flats will not have any sort of shrink ray effect on his flippers. Because trannies have the emotional wherewithal of tissue paper, of course, he cried about it.

This one confuses me. If he can even FIT into a womens size 5 that's already pretty small-not to mention women with big feet exist and aren't that uncommon.

I swear trannies think tiny anime girls are reality

 

[Apustajan apustaja]

A pooner with a preoccupation with her packer is put in a pickle when people have to poke her pretend-penis in public. Try saying that several times fast!

Lol she is dressing sexually provocative (like teenage girls a certain age do), but stuffing her pants in stead of her bra. Her "bros" don't get it and make fun of her.
I feel terrible for the teenage boys not alloweed ro make fun of the one with the cucumber down his pants, because she might kill herself if you mention her fake dick. Derrek Smalls energy with many pooners.

 

[Owner of a Lonely Hole]

This one confuses me. If he can even FIT into a womens size 5 that's already pretty small-not to mention women with big feet exist and aren't that uncommon.

I swear trannies think tiny anime girls are reality

They ARE. A reality, they just all become TIFs.

 

[RuPaul’s Drag Racist]

A pooner with a preoccupation with her packer is put in a pickle when people have to poke her pretend-penis in public. Try saying that several times fast!

This is a crazy idea, but maybe don’t wear the fake dick when you go through airport security? Literally nobody but her would know the difference, but I guess that’s genocide, asking her to go a few hours without wearing her fake wiener.

Thread tax: Mom found the fake wiener!
L A

Spoiler: Words

I was hiding it pretty well for a while (kicking it under the couch and putting it in a sock) but one day I accidentally left it in the bathroom. Out in the open. for everyone to see. You don’t understand the fear I felt when she said “what’s this?” I tried to explain to her it wasn’t for THAT and I use it to pee, and she actually understood. She even was like “damn that’s so convenient, I wanna penis!!” So it’s all good now and I don’t have to hide it lol,also my sister keeps telling everyone I have dildo, so i throw it at her (WASHED) and she runs away from it like a cat from a cucumber

 

[femboy fart huffer]

Oh. That's. Ok. That's two young children talking about buying sex toys. Thank you reddit. If you're too young to buy your own sex toys you're too young to touch any tranny shit, probably too young to touch reddit as a whole.

Also why the fuck would you store your dildos under the fucking sofa in a sock? Do you retards not have wardrobes or some shit? Throwing your sex toys at a family member is also fucking disgusting. I do not care if it is not meant to go inside you it is fucking disgusting. That's not funny you're just vile and the fact you have no shame about that sort of shit speaks about how desensitized to pornography you are even at a young age.

 

[Sean Andalou]

Pooner gets a lap dance at a strip club.


Reddit -- Archive

I turned 18 yesterday and went to a strip club with my boyfriend because… why not I guess? Judge me if you want?

Anyways, one of the dancers offered me a lap dance and I accepted and I guess I didn’t realize just how much physical contact was involved in a lap dance because she was like. ALL up in my crotch. But then I kind of started overthinking it because I don’t have a cis dick and I got in my head like what if she thinks I’m not into it because she can’t, yk… feel it? Should I have disclosed the fact that I’m trans first??? What if I accidentally misled the dancer and made her do smthn she’s not comfortable with?? I mean I’d feel bad if she walked away thinking I wasn’t enjoying it, or feeling misled? Like I know it’s important to disclose being trans to sexual partners, but I’m not very familiar with club etiquette, obviously.

I guess I just want someone to tell me I’m overthinking it, or what I should’ve done instead so I know better if something like that ever happens again in the future.

Lots of upvotes lots of comments.
Top comment.

…This is an adorable post.

The dancer is working. She does not care. Be respectful, and give a good tip as you do to all service workers.

You are a newly eighteen year old guy in a gay relationship. I don’t think she was expecting anything from you.

 

[stupid frog]

Why is the lap dance on my lap?????

 

[General Patton]

Transbian got his crush snatched away by an older woman, who is causing his crush to become more and more transphobic.
View attachment 7723486
https://old.reddit.com/r/MtF/comments/1mex3rr/the_girl_i_like_is_becoming_transphobic/
https://archive.ph/wRRxq

I like how one of the comments is some rando diagnosing the older girlfriend as a narcissist despite not knowing her and based on some whining story.

 

[Paper Machete]

"The dancer is working. She does not care. Be respectful, and give a good tip as you do to all service workers."

In the grand scheme of things it doesn't matter because it's not going to effect you outside duh club. But, I always find it funny when these pooners (I've seen multiple posts like this) claim that that pros are just neutral about everything because they've been fed the proggie lie of "sex work is work" and all that. 100% all the girls were cackling about the poon poon while fixing their makeup. And they probably think all their clients are various combinations of weird, retarded, gross, lame, and gay.

 

[DYLAN ‘DIELAWN’ VOLK]

Impressions: who's going to question a pooner about wearing boxers?

Is it that weird? I used to wear the American Apparel boxer briefs when I was younger and I've bought boxers to wear as shorts too. They make boxers for women as well. Young people are such weirdos about clothes.

 

[Lady Bizness]

I'm on NextDoor to do three things: find lost pets, rubberneck at hyperlocal gossip, and report gendies who join with fake names. Don't even have to go looking for them; the first thing a person of gender posts is something educational about their completely unique journey.

Glad to see my work is being appreciated.

Late and gay, but I just wanted you to know, my favorite Aunt, that this is my retirement aspiration. As it stands now I have to whisper into my husband's ear what to report and shitpost. Thank God I didn't take his stupid name.

 

[Dolly Brooks]

This one confuses me. If he can even FIT into a womens size 5 that's already pretty small-not to mention women with big feet exist and aren't that uncommon.

I swear trannies think tiny anime girls are reality

Yeah, that crazy small size stumped me the other day. I just assumed he was Asian or something. He’s 15 and here’s his height and weight:


So maybe not Lupron but Spiro + estrogen and progesterone?

 

[JED]

Yeah, that crazy small size stumped me the other day. I just assumed he was Asian or something. He’s 15 and here’s his height and weight:
View attachment 7738380
View attachment 7738391
So maybe not Lupron but Spiro + estrogen and progesterone?

That's smaller than a vast majority of girls I knew growing up, I'd say this is a win for being one of 5 female sized troons but it's obvious this kid was groomed young. Hopefully he'll be okay and can accept himself as he is.

 

[Dr. Butt]

Lol.
View attachment 7736119

Tranny-on-tranny violence???

 

[Positron]

Throwing your sex toys at a family member is also fucking disgusting.

Throwing fake dicks, be they packers, dildos or dilators, at family members seems to be a troon or pooner's way of saying Hello.

 

[General Patton]

Is it that weird? I used to wear the American Apparel boxer briefs when I was younger and I've bought boxers to wear as shorts too. They make boxers for women as well. Young people are such weirdos about clothes.

I knew a girl when I was a kid who used to wear boxers. Suddenly that's a big deal?

 

[Aunt Carol]

And for $250 he will get stoned and "fold dishes in a bikini". (Folding dishes? Is bro stoned and meant to say "wash dishes" or "fold clothes", or is he offering to tenderly tuck a plate into a rank used bikini and be like "that'll be $250 and that blunt you just rolled plz.")

Ancient weed meme.