Official Kiwi Farms 'Dubai Chocolate' Hate Thread - This thread can also serve as a hub for other Instagramslop food

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This stuff started popping up in my local grocery store and now they have brought out the newest abomination.
Screenshot_20250728-115134.webp
It's the same pistachio cream chocolate but it also has cotton candy inside. You cannot convince me that people actually eat this.
 
Kiwi Velour said:
Before I read this thread I thought "dubai chocolate" was going to me some kind of scat perversion committed by the rich.
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The conspiracy theory is it was in fact invented for SEO to cover up this particular Dubai perversion.
 
Pod 042 said:
It's the same pistachio cream chocolate but it also has cotton candy inside. You cannot convince me that people actually eat this.
Click to expand...
It looks like diabeetus in bar form.

There's a soft serve chain around here, called Surreal, that serves abominations, so I bet there is a market for this.

it is my birthday ice cream in a mason jar.webp
 
Are the okay ones any similar to this? Ngl, I am curious about the dubai one to see what's all the fuss about, but still I did not yield and also I hate Dubai so...

1000000110.webp
 
Detective Carey said:
Fuck that green paste stuff.
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That green paste is not the real shit. The real shit is a combo of ground pistachios and shredded phyllo dough called kataifi, very similar to Middle Eastern baklava. It should never be just a paste. It should never be bright green. That's pig disgusting.

(And with the pure ripoff products probably also has artificial dyes because idiots think it should be glowing radioactive green for some reason. That is fake shit.)

The important ingredient, much like with baklava, is the shredded toasted phyllo dough which should be CRUNCHY.

Fun fact, you can actually do this yourself if you're insane.

It's actually a pretty labor-intensive process (this short video doesn't get into the process of shredding phyllo). You will also notice the amount of actual green shit that goes in is very small.

A much cheaper way of getting the experience is just buy a really good chocolate bar and a box of pistachio baklava. And you can swing that for $10 or so.
 
So its just a light coating of decent chocolate filled with a mixture of honey, pistachios, and shredded wheat?
You can make many bars of that at home with little effort for $20, including buying a mold. I think buying the bars is only big because women are really into blowing money on status objects and like bright disgusting colors.
Pod 042 said:
This stuff started popping up in my local grocery store and now they have brought out the newest abomination.
View attachment 7703958
It's the same pistachio cream chocolate but it also has cotton candy inside. You cannot convince me that people actually eat this.
Click to expand...
My local one bought two boxes of these and I think they managed to sell 2 in the last 3 months. It doesn't even look good in the render on the box, what the hell was anyone thinking?
 
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