💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[John Andrews Stan]

These people turning to JACK SCALFANI for religious guidance are fucking hopeless. But nice of Jack to confirm he is completely ignorant of literally millennia of theological debate about the extent to which dina d'malchuta dina applies.

The Aramaic phrase means “the law of the land is the law.” It is widely held to specifically regard taxes, and includes not e.g. patronizing businesses whose owners you know do not pay their taxes, as you would be assisting him in both breaking the law of the land and transgressing Torah law. The debates are extremely interesting because of questions pertaining to how far they extend when living under e.g. totalitarian rule.

Of course Jack just declares there is no room for discussion or debate because he is completely ignorant of his own religion and its foundations. So we can be sure he’s never gone even one mile over the speed limit, right?

 

[Sneedmiser]

These people turning to JACK SCALFANI for religious guidance are fucking hopeless. But nice of Jack to confirm he is completely ignorant of literally millennia of theological debate about the extent to which dina d'malchuta dina applies.

His religious videos get less views than his normal ones and zero comments, I wouldn't be worried about anyone getting theology from Jack.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

His religious videos get less views than his normal ones and zero comments, I wouldn't be worried about anyone getting theology from Jack.

I mean anyone who does is beyond help. I’m just amazed they exist. I can only be stupidly optimistic and hope they’re yanking his chain.

 

[ILikeYou]

ZAXBY'S NEW DRY RUB & GIANT QUESADILLA​

(07/09/25)

Original:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=wcWGmgNOEQ4Preserve Tube: https://preservetube.com/watch?v=wcWGmgNOEQ4

Spoiler: Local Archive

wcWGmgNOEQ4.mp4

At 2:28, he says, 'We got five wings for...eight 'nerty' nine. What the frick?!' Is he that poorly able to control his mouth movements and speech now, that he said 'nerty' instead of 'thirty'? How do you substitute that sound for the other, and not even mention you just did that?

 

[densedance]

ZAXBY'S NEW DRY RUB & GIANT QUESADILLA​

(07/09/25)

Original:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=wcWGmgNOEQ4Preserve Tube: https://preservetube.com/watch?v=wcWGmgNOEQ4

Spoiler: Local Archive

wcWGmgNOEQ4.mp4

As allways, very insightfull and helpfull.
"It's good" - "If you don't like lemuns, don't order it"

ogeey gujz see you on X

 

[the khat quaffer]

I hope it happens on a live stream.
View attachment 7622205

If it happens live on stream, it'll be during a chimpout, maybe when he livestreams himself trying to negotiate his fast food order with some poor wagie or his internet bill increase with the dotheads in an outsourced call center.

Preview of his on-air stroke:

Spoiler: stupid and gay

His religious videos get less views than his normal ones and zero comments, I wouldn't be worried about anyone getting theology from Jack.

He could be moderating comments, but I'm actually willing to bet his side videos are just that boring that not even trolls will bite. I mean, what is there for weens to even shitpost about. Jack being an idiot about religion. What else is new. His F as in Faggot podcast? Jack being an idiot about current events, dime a dozen shitposting. His JoTG videos? You can only say "stop being a retard in public" so many times. Though it is fun.

His cooking videos, at least there's something to poke fun at or genuinely criticize.

 

[SteveGoatman]

ZAXBY'S NEW DRY RUB & GIANT QUESADILLA​

(07/09/25)

Original:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=wcWGmgNOEQ4Preserve Tube: https://preservetube.com/watch?v=wcWGmgNOEQ4

Spoiler: Local Archive

wcWGmgNOEQ4.mp4

"COngratulations Zaxby" he says at the end....as if anyone in the world, let alone at the restaurant chain, gives even the slightest of shits about his sheet of paper deep "review" of their new menu items.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

No comment



Still being an asshole to that guy asking him theology questions by saying God says to follow the law

 

[Dead Air]

Has Jack turned comments off on his videos again?

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

I think it 's too late for that fat ass to not die by way of food

 

[John Andrews Stan]

Still being an asshole to that guy asking him theology questions by saying God says to follow the law

I love that Jack is confirming that he believes there is no need for study or discussion of the Bible. He is just so fucking dumb and undeservedly arrogant.

 

[Sneedmiser]

Has Jack turned comments off on his videos again?

They're on but nobody is commenting. Some of his channels have dislikes turned off.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

Between the various topics Jack uses the dictation feature on his phone to croak with presumed authority about (e.g., cooking, theology, film criticism, counting a whole box of nails, space lasers that control the weather, and content creation as a profession), I wonder which he knows least about. His habitual contrarianism he qualifies by telling people who take the bait to "do their own research" doesn't count - I'm referring to the subjects he regularly lords over strangers, as though he has authority over anything more than the mouth-end of his digestive tract.

I also wonder which would be funnier: Continuing the "content creation mentorship" LARP until he's dead, or announcing a hiatus/retirement from it. That the guy who can't adjust his own wheelchair brakes, follow the plot of a feature-length children's cartoon, or tell the truth about what he's eating has no business advising anybody - in any area - makes me wish he would self-publish another book on the subject of being a successful content creator. If not, we should write one for him; complete with a page that is blank aside from the word "onion" and the number 5.

I think of all the subjects that Jack acts like he authority about, I think the worst one is definitely his film criticism and when he talks about gaming.

His cooking at least is good for a elementary school kid so there's at least something there. His theology, political, and conspiracy views are that of the average boomer or thunderdomer.

But his gaming and film takes are genuinely in a special tier of stupid that I could not comprehend.

He acts like he's this guy who is wanting to look out for the family but not only has he recommended R-Rated action movies for even children.

Jack also claims he's an anti-woke guy but he regularly watches disney slop and the stuff he calls woke would get glowing reviews like The Marvels, Snow White 2025, and Lilo and Stitch 2025 (this one in particular has a blatant pro-sepearation message that even someone more liberal like me would think is absurd).

But now that Superman is coming out and people on the TV are saying that it's a woke movie, and his own presumed biases (like how Superman isn't the most OP guy ever with how he gets mad when Superman is vulnerable), he's ringing the alarm bells for a movie he hasn't seen yet.



Now for gaming, its simple, he was calling Xbox a winner in the gaming console wars because multiple systems games could be played in one, despite the fact that Microsoft suffered massive layoffs recently, has no exclusives, and doesn't do well in Asian regions like Japan.

 

[Uber driver reviewer]

Served by Rondickus Woodward.


Gratulations Zaxbees. Tammy will be back tomorrow for Robdickus

 

[AnOminous]

There is this but most of the time when I hear these people badmouth the Catholics it's going back to the time of the Reformation and Martin Luther. Or they just complain that "Jesus never mentioned that somebody should be the head of the church" or something.

Except he did.

"And I say also unto thee, That thou art Peter, and upon this rock I will build my church; and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it." Matthew 16:18.

This was also a pun because "tu es Petrus" means both "You are Peter" and "petrus" also means "rock."

 

[AnOminous]

I hope it happens on a live stream.

Jack is so utterly disgusting. He was raised like a pig. If I ate like that my mom would have smacked me in the chops.

 

[Shartavius]

I think it 's too late for that fat ass to not die by way of food

Everything else he listed is QAnon shit; meaning he's referring to the food other people eat, which is killing them: Vegetables, energy drinks he resents not being allowed to have, "fake meat", and medication. The barely sentient fatberg is boasting that he'll die of natural causes, due to his longevity-associated diet of raw chuck roast chunks covered in brown sugar sneezning, Bacon Up, entire Costco rotisserie chickens, and blocks of cheddar cheese. And, per Jack's unspoken rule, none of the mountains of garbage he eats in pre-execution quantities any time the camera is off is counted by his body, Santa Claus, or Jesus.

I can't help but picture the orange ring of grease baked into the entire inside perimeter of that toilet bowl we know he had installed a few feet away from the "studio kitchen" he displays his poisoned eggs and bloody tree stump in. He probably brags to company that his toilet is "seasoned" like a cast iron skillet; and that no blood sticks to it.

 

[Uber driver reviewer]

If it happens live on stream, it'll be during a chimpout, maybe when he livestreams himself trying to negotiate his fast food order with some poor wagie or his internet bill increase with the dotheads in an outsourced call center.

Preview of his on-air stroke:

Spoiler: stupid and gay

https://youtube.com/watch?v=TH8mJMrydSQ:17204

He could be moderating comments, but I'm actually willing to bet his side videos are just that boring that not even trolls will bite. I mean, what is there for weens to even shitpost about. Jack being an idiot about religion. What else is new. His F as in Faggot podcast? Jack being an idiot about current events, dime a dozen shitposting. His JoTG videos? You can only say "stop being a retard in public" so many times. Though it is fun.

His cooking videos, at least there's something to poke fun at or genuinely criticize.

The religious videos are Jack’s prospering grounds to groom his next JOTG boyfriend…..

It’s just an elaborate flirting session.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Except he did.

"And I say also unto thee, That thou art Peter, and upon this rock I will build my church; and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it." Matthew 16:18.

This was also a pun because "tu es Petrus" means both "You are Peter" and "petrus" also means "rock."

Of course he did but you expect them to know this? But their anger towards the Pope has to do with how corrupt and powerful the church was during that time. The Pope had more power than the Kings. He could excommunicate a King and prevent him from taking communion until the King made his way to Rome or Avignon or wherever the Pope was staying and beg him for forgiveness.

That's power. And then of course the wealth the church had, how they sold indulgences, how much land they owned and so on. In the end the Reformation was a good thing but then it fractured like everything else and that's why we have 45,000 sects of Christianity each claiming to be the one true church.

 

[Shartavius]

Thank goodness Jack was born into the one, true religion: The Jehova's Witnesses.