- Joined
- May 26, 2013
I like the idea that the many many parasites and pathogens Jack has gleefully consumed over the years have directly eaten their way into his skull.
💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental
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- Joined
- May 27, 2019
>into his skull
Where they found...fuck all to feast on and starved to death.
- Joined
- Nov 10, 2022
Every complaint Jack has for his species is the flimsiest of fronts for his actual complaint of not being fed quickly enough or in size queen portions.
If Jack is on the same road as all these people who surely must not have a job (or destination???), what does that say about him? The guy was never any good at empathizing - but now he can't even fathom that everybody else he sees on the road isn't also on their way to or from either a fast food dining room or the designated toilet in his house that has all the cracks and crushed black widows on the seat, and miscarriage spatters in and three feet around the bowl in a pattern evocative of someone mixing red velvet cake batter in it at high RPM, with elephant footprints leading into the shower.
If Jack is on the same road as all these people who surely must not have a job (or destination???), what does that say about him? The guy was never any good at empathizing - but now he can't even fathom that everybody else he sees on the road isn't also on their way to or from either a fast food dining room or the designated toilet in his house that has all the cracks and crushed black widows on the seat, and miscarriage spatters in and three feet around the bowl in a pattern evocative of someone mixing red velvet cake batter in it at high RPM, with elephant footprints leading into the shower.
myhairisonfire
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Oct 22, 2024
Social media has broken this boomers brain. He is addicted to outrage. Every topic has to be a point of contention, indignation, or some kind of scandal. Every thing must have something wrong with it that he can identify, split in to 'right' and 'wrong', and identify himself on the 'correct' side of. Food, movies, traffic, religion, politics, anything at all. He has to have an opinion on it and share that others are clearly in the wrong with no deeper thought required.
REGENDarySumanai
Scraping the arse end of the barrel for these.
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True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Nov 8, 2017
I wouldn't be surprised if those vehicles are going to work.
a terminal posture
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Sep 19, 2019
Man, oh man. You go for months with middling Jack content and assume he's too stroked out to ever make anything good again and just out of nowhere he knocks it out of the park with this one. Jack decides to find out if the supermarket is trying to rip you off by shorting you on meat vs what's on the package, and does this by weighting/counting a bunch of different factory packaged foods and non foods including the meat, which was clearly ground and packaged off-site. He counts the six pack of Zebra Cakes to make sure they're not shorting you! He displays no knowledge of 'mean' and 'standard deviation'! He explains to you that he is zeroing out the weight of the bowl so it isn't included in the food weight! This man is in his fifties! Dear lord! This is a must-watch.
- Joined
- Nov 10, 2022
Jack is increasingly reminding me of those remarkable chickens and cows that lose most of their heads above the brain stem, yet persist to carry on in their meager, doldrum routines for a time until the rest of the body finally shuts down.
Edit: The video is premised upon the fat, stupid fuck pretending that Walmart would - for no reason, whatsoever - willingly short themselves food they've purchased from distributors falsifying shipment weights for no reason, whatsoever...before perpetrating a separate act of fraud by selling the mislabeled/shorted merchandise to Jack. And his idea of "investigation...investigative journalism" is Tammy buying random bullshit such as nails and cheerios for Jack to manually count for the sake of confirming that...indeed; the contents match up with the legally binding text on the package. Every, single item scored at Wally World was [surprise!] accurately labeled, and the guy who lies about standing up is taking credit for it. I guess.
Edit: The video is premised upon the fat, stupid fuck pretending that Walmart would - for no reason, whatsoever - willingly short themselves food they've purchased from distributors falsifying shipment weights for no reason, whatsoever...before perpetrating a separate act of fraud by selling the mislabeled/shorted merchandise to Jack. And his idea of "investigation...investigative journalism" is Tammy buying random bullshit such as nails and cheerios for Jack to manually count for the sake of confirming that...indeed; the contents match up with the legally binding text on the package. Every, single item scored at Wally World was [surprise!] accurately labeled, and the guy who lies about standing up is taking credit for it. I guess.
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- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
Jack is a retard (shocker, I know). Packaged meat can lose weight through losing water/blood/etc after being packed. So if you take it out of the package, it will likely weigh a bit less
Dollar Duck
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- May 10, 2021
Other people that are not Jack and not disabled fat fucks: *exists*
Jack: DONT YOU GO TO WORK?????
myhairisonfire
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Oct 22, 2024
This whole video would be a great project for a 4th grade science fair or home economics class. Teaches the kids how to navigate a grocery store, read package labeling, use a food scale, record data, and present to an audience.
Says a lot about Jacks mental age.
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- Joined
- Dec 12, 2022
That's an awful lot of shurgur for a household that considers it a poison worse than arsenic. Hopefully Jack doesn't eat the box of nails just like he doesn't eat all that other crap.
- Joined
- Dec 28, 2014
He ate all of those the instant the video was over, the fat bastard. He probably just shoved each one whole into his mouth and gargled it down while the cream oozed out onto his face.
- Joined
- Sep 5, 2019
- Joined
- Sep 3, 2014
Last I checked they measure meat cuts by the weight when processed or packaged, and the price per pound is just a guideline for you the customer, just in case the listed price is a bit off due to it being like 1.1 pounds or 0.92 pounds. Same logic as when you deal with stuff like fruits that you bag yourself.
This is essentially the only time a "Playing With Your Food" episode was actually interesting, and that's just due to Jack being a seething retard who's scared he might being paying more money for more meat and snacks. It's also something he's only doing because I bet his dickhead brother Charles told him about a concept called shrinkflation, and it's making him tantrum and shit himself in fear at the idea. You're like two or three years late to the idea again Jack. Same with that fucking quiche crap you steal from carnie tiktoks.
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2013
Oh yeah, you just know that fat ass shoved that sugary trash down his gullet the second the camera was off and will still pretend to be carnivore dieting.
also lol this comment is accurate:
Buck Mullet
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Nov 11, 2015
At 2:25 Jack bitches about how tiny the cakes are and says they're personal sized... yeah, for him. Most of the cakes look like they could be cut into 8-10 normal sized slices, even the smaller ones cut into fourths would be considered four servings. He's such an insufferable glutton.
- Joined
- Oct 29, 2023
I imagine Jack eats cake by just shoving the entire cake in his mouth.
- Joined
- May 27, 2019
A "REAL" investigation with at least some merit would be if he took one of those little debbies and burned them in a food calorimetry experiment to investigate if he's really getting all the fat he paid for and so desperately craves. Nobody cares that 12 donuts x whatever grams = approx. what is on the box. The measured caloric content (even as a rough estimate) compared to the stated content would be infinitely more valuable knowledge; regardless, no human being should be eating any of that shit to begin with. Those are snacks for obese 8 year olds. Nobody over the age of 12 should be eating those.
I am surprised he didn't sneak a chomp off one of those cakes, flipped it around so the camera didn't see the bite, then weighed it and said "SEE! 20 GRAMS LESS! WE'RE GETTING ROBBED! DEEP STATE!"
8:19 Jack the Alchemist manages to turn an 87 g little debbie cake into an 89 kg cake. He made God step aside so he could upset the very balance of nature.
10:52 Rainman counts nails. Nails that he can't even use because his wanker's claw won't let him hold a nail and a hammer. Another tax write-off I guess.
Wasn't he bitching earlier today about people not being at work? I guarantee NONE of the people in the photo he (or Tammy) took went home and measured fruit rollups.
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