💀 Horrorcow Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta / "u/Early-Leopard-8351" - Polysubstance abuser, child doser, dog killer. "Lawtube pope" turned zesty Dabbleverse Redditor streamer. Swinger "whitebread ass nigga" who snuffs animals and visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold. Still not over his ex Aaron. Wife's bod worth $50.

[John Andrews Stan]

Says he's sorry for causing pain to his kids

If that were true, he would not be actively exposing them to further humiliation and trauma.

Fuck this guy. His kids would be better off with him in a grave.

 

[Captain Manning]

- Says people are stupid over acting shocked over the coke bust because it's not like he was hiding it.

I mean, he's partially right. There was plenty of warning he was on drugs, so that wasn't a gigantic shock.

The shocking thing came less than a month later when his 8 year old tested positive for coke. That's what makes him irredeemable scum.

 

[Terrorist]

It's only a matter of time before Alex Stein tells Trump about Nick and something like this becomes real. How can we get Grima Wormt-I mean Elon Musk to talk with Alex?

More and more people are saying every day that Kayla Rekeita’s crotch smells very bad, VERY BAAAAD folks - and unlike SLEEPY JOE BIDEN I have appointed one of our BEST men to get to the bottom of this stinky situation. We love Mr. @Fapcop don’t we folks?

 

[Chazzed Up]

- Says people are stupid for acting shocked over the coke bust because it's not like he was hiding it.

Okay so why then exactly did he allow EVS and his other noseguards to accuse his son of being the owner of the coke? It was his own people who were sweeping and denying the coke was his.

 

[Fapcop]

More and more people are saying every day that Kayla Rekeita’s crotch smells very bad, VERY BAAAAD folks - and unlike SLEEPY JOE BIDEN I have appointed one of our BEST men to get to the bottom of this stinky situation. We love Mr. @Fapcop don’t we folks?

You can count on me Mr President!

 

[AnOminous]

Nick will convince himself of this. Remember, in his mind, he's convinced everyone in the church except the incel prudes, the he is both David and Jesus.

Nick is a homosexual liar. He is literally incapable of telling the truth about anything. He CAN'T tell the truth. Therefore, anything that comes out of his lie-hole is AUTOMATICALLY a lie.

 

[Vibralldo]

Well, when he called in to NLO the other day, he used the phrase: '... and the cops cracked open the safe.... '

Which implies that it was locked, but easily opened.

I mean he could have used "cracked open" as a deliberately vague phrase to either mean the safe was locked and required to be cracked, or it was unlocked and it's just a euphemism for opening it like you crack open a book or a beer.

That way next week when his story changes he can say he always meant that the safes were unlocked

 

[AnOminous]

Fuck this guy. His kids would be better off with him in a grave.

Only with a stake through his heart, guaranteeing this homosexual sperm vampire never rises again. Burying him at a crossroads at dawn and definitely not giving cocaine to the vampire corpse or it just wakes up and does this.

 

[200MB]

Summary of the Coomalot stream with Rekieta. I'm ignoring repetitive stuff regarding Aaron, supposedly not wanting to drink now, cult leader allegations, losing weight, being drug tested 5x/week until Nov., etc. (All of which were mentioned.)

And this was all on his buddy's birthday stream. For a guy that brags about being a super fun party animal he's a real downer. You really can't shut the fuck up about yourself and your gay life for one night?

 

[Vibralldo]

Says people are stupid for acting shocked over the coke bust because it's not like he was hiding it.

It isn't like after the cokestream he kept denying it was coke and just said he was really drunk and that it totally wasn't white powder clearly visible on his nose

And this was all on his buddy's birthday stream. For a guy that brags about being a super fun party animal he's a real downer. You really can't shut the fuck up about yourself and your gay life for one night?

He misses his gay ex too much

 

[Terrorist]

You can count on me Mr President!

They’re saying Kayla smells like an Indonesian corpse flower down there. Love Indonesia, great country by the way, but would I be able to maintain an erection in that scenario? I don’t know folks. Maybe. Maybe not. But @Fapcop likes what he likes and he knows what he likes and it’s terrific.

 

[Captain Manning]

"I can't get ahold of Drex..."

"[h]e completely misunderstands something, and is mad about it... but he won't tell me what it is."

I am pretty sure I know what it is. It concerns a certain 8 year old.

Say what you want about Drex, but he was actually pretty adamant about being against drug use, and drug use around children.

You actually became so degen, not even Drex wants anything to do with you anymore. Congratulations, Nick.

Well, when he called in to NLO the other day, he used the phrase: '... and the cops cracked open the safe.... '

Which implies that it was locked, but easily opened.

Addressed several pages back. Not in police report. Nick lies constantly.

 

[AnOminous]

And this was all on his buddy's birthday stream. For a guy that brags about being a super fun party animal he's a real downer. You really can't shut the fuck up about yourself and your gay life for one night?

This is Nick, the most gigantic homosexual in the entire world. God what a fucking queer. Even when he isn't having gay sex, he can't stop ranting about all the gay sex he has. What a fucking fag.

 

[Melty Butter]

And this was all on his buddy's birthday stream. For a guy that brags about being a super fun party animal he's a real downer. You really can't shut the fuck up about yourself and your gay life for one night?

Great point. I didn't even think about that. I don't recall him saying "Happy Birthday" a single time. He came on the stream to focus on himself: He opened with "Hi Guys... It's like some weird stuff happened this year."

 

[daffodils]

- Says he can be drug tested in Vegas for Hackomania if necessary; will only go for Thurs and Fri bc it's Mother's Day weekend.

On his Melton call-in he said he's already "politely pushing the court and Kayla" to give him an extra day, either Wednesday or Saturday. If he gets it, he will set up a fan meeting. This Vegas adventure has potential.

 

[SargonF00t]

Says he can be drug tested in Vegas for Hackomania if necessary; will only go for Thurs and Fri bc it's Mother's Day weekend.

Got to make sure that Trust Fund money doesn't dry up.

 

[AnOminous]

Great point. I didn't even think about that. I don't recall him saying "Happy Birthday" a single time. He came on the stream to focus on himself: He opened with "Hi Guys... It's like some weird stuff happened this year."

Fun fact: anything Nick says can be ignored because it's just the result of whatever nigger just blew a load in his asshole.

 

[Captain Manning]

Great point. I didn't even think about that. I don't recall him saying "Happy Birthday" a single time. He came on the stream to focus on himself: He opened with "Hi Guys... It's like some weird stuff happened this year."

"Hey guys... listen... I have GOT to talk to you about Aaron's penis."

 

[Ethan Ralph Is 5'1"]

The Cringetastic Four



Coomalot: Able to contort and bend himself backwards for unearned clout
Xia: The Invisible Woman in every video call live stream, just sitting there doing nothing
Rekieta: Setting himself and his family life ablaze, "FLAME ON!"
Cecil Says: I had to look up who the fuck he even is, so I guess my entire joke here falls apart, unless someone else can equate him with The Thing...

 

[Vibralldo]

"Hey guys... listen... I have GOT to talk to you about Aaron's penis."

Aaron's cock was so good that it's literally the only thing he thinks about now

What does he do during the day? Plan the trial he's making his wife go through to hurt Aaron, watch Aaron's show and masturbate report any mention of Kayla to the cops, superchats into streams about Aaron, and if he feels up to it, call in to talk about Aaron.

He's traveling in a couple months to go to an event because the host hates Aaron almost as much as him.

His entire life literally revolves around Aaron's cock now. Aside from galaxy gas he doesn't seem to have any hobbies or interests.