💀 Horrorcow Nicholas Robert Rekieta / Rekieta "Law" / Actually Criminal / @NickRekieta / "u/Early-Leopard-8351" - Polysubstance abuser, child doser, dog killer. "Lawtube pope" turned zesty Dabbleverse Redditor streamer. Swinger "whitebread ass nigga" who snuffs animals and visits 🇯🇲 BBC resorts. Legally a cuckold. Still not over his ex Aaron. Wife's bod worth $50.

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Luna's expiration date is?

  • <1 year

    Votes: 156 22.5%
  • Around 2 years

    Votes: 276 39.8%
  • 3-5 years

    Votes: 93 13.4%
  • As long as a pug lives, Karen farmer.

    Votes: 169 24.4%

  • Total voters
    694
View attachment 6274597

So apparently urine tests are bad for alcohol testing because people have an autobrewery function in their gut. Nick testing positive for alcohol on his UA submitted to the court is not an issue...

Hoe wrong we were...
So is this why Ethan Ralph pisses in his liquor bottles? The urine ferments into fine malt whisky?
That brings a whole new meaning to bottles.wav.
 
Rate me late but what if the reason Nick's daughter tested positive is because Aaron being retarded used the crack pan to heat up the spaghettiOs after Nick left it on the stove

That is only a theory of how exposure could be somewhat accidental. We will probably never know, but if that is the BEST scenario, it does fuck all for Nick's image.

Can’t believe this pack of losers somehow ended up being multimillionaires.

It was Nick's grandparent's (not his parents) that made the wise financial moves.

Yeah they can be.

In this case however, it’s just Nick being retarded.

He’s not charged with TAKING cocaine. He’s charged with possession.

As Sweep said, she regularly works around people’s criminal cases. But Nick as always thinks he’s smarter than anyone else, and somehow thinks that his brilliant (non practicing attorney) legal skills will result in the jury going: “Your honor, since we can’t prove that a burglar didn’t break into the house and put the cocaine there without the Rekieta’s knowing about it, we find the accused not guilty!”

And then the judge bangs the gavel and sentences Sweep to pay Nick a million dollars or something.

Nick really is the hero of his own story. No one in theor right mind believes that some technicality will spade them years in jail if a JURY of normal-ish people has ro deliberate on it. Based on leaked transcripts, it is clear the judge and CPS are NOT buying his shite.

wasnt he planning on taking the plea deal only if he failed to throw out the warrant ie hoping to go down kicking and screaming and only after wasting the courts time which the plea deal is supposed to prevent will he try and "graciously" take a now much expired bargain

That is a theory. I agree with it, but it is insane--like a child who throws a a tantrum for 15 minutes over eating three veg, then after some large consequence comes down wails 'I'LL EAT IT! PLEASE DONT PUNISH ME!!!'

Nick will be past the point of no-return if he keeps sticking obstinately to his ludicrous expectations.

Nick is WAY worse than Ron Toye ever was.

It must burn him to be such a loser.

Toye only has him beat at present in memtic value (and number of people slapped with a telly remote). Nick is on track to overtake that position.

Odd. I've never pissed hot for booze. I must be a freak of nature.

You must donate your body to science!

Nick would ask if they were screening for ethanol and what was the calibration on that unit that did your test.

Sounds about right for guy like Nick. Always has to feel like he is the master of the narrative.

I'm guessing he also has to get the last word in to the conversation?

Null should do the pissed GF thing and just respond with 'K' to test the theory
 
dunno, he also does this thing where he concludes a monologue with "peace" as if to imply he's done talking to me, and then responds anyways.
You sure he's not using speech to text and the app isn't confusing "piss" and "peace"? the man texts you on the shower, it's not such a stretch to think he would move on to texting you on the golden shower.

You're very welcome for the mental image, by the way.
 
From what I understand Nick is/was very much a control freak and incredibly lazy. The editor he had was supposed to generate clips and apparently would do the work. But because Nick would not give him to ability to publish to the channel, Nick had to review everything himself. Nick is so lazy he wouldn't do it so nothing ever got published.

Make all appropriate substitutions but I think you get it.
 
That is a theory. I agree with it, but it is insane--like a child who throws a a tantrum for 15 minutes over eating three veg, then after some large consequence comes down wails 'I'LL EAT IT! PLEASE DONT PUNISH ME!!!'

Nick will be past the point of no-return if he keeps sticking obstinately to his ludicrous expectations.
thats why i hope he goes down that path so hell be optimally fucked. not only all the negatives of having rejected the plea deal and angering the court and wasting his chance at mercy but also of having his chance at being an arrogant defiant rebel to the end crashed when he sobs and begs for the plea deal when its far too late and hell be made to actually try and defend his fucked up actions.
 
concludes a monologue with "peace" as if to imply he's done talking to me, and then responds anyways.
I imagine it's a tick or double-speak similar as to his typical "I wish you make a million dollars". Where you can definetelly tell that he means exactly the opposite but he stills has plausible deniability whenever a thrid party asks him if he really does wish you a gorillion dollars. His cooked lawyer brain thinks that he's playing everyone with that weird form of double-meaning, but he only makes himself look like a snotty child. In this case I assume that "peace" translates to "fuck you!" or "go fuck yourself" in Balldo speak / Balldo-nesse.
 
dunno, he also does this thing where he concludes a monologue with "peace" as if to imply he's done talking to me, and then responds anyways.

He's weak.

Nick's "peace" thing feels like a cope that worked once in high school and he's never let go of it since. It's not like saying that at the end of an unhinged rant (or stream) makes what you did less terrible. But Nick seems like the kind of a guy who would totally believe in the "hole in the sheet" loophole.
It's a control thing / "I control when and how this conversation ends" and a way to pretend to be above the pettiness he is never above, as shown by his inability to end it there.

But he can't even stand by his own implied decree - thus he chooses an ambiguous term rather than a clear "I'm done talking." The usual effort to set up a loophole for himself so he can believe he didn't actually reverse himself immediately.
 
I can only imagine maintaining his dumbass double-speak habit is tiring. How does his brain handle the dissonance of saying the opposite of what he means all the time? Doesn't part of him just want to break free and tell his enemies to fuck off? Maybe that's why he has been too tired to keep his home clean and his kids fed? Being a bullshit artist is not always easy work.
 
How does his brain handle the dissonance of saying the opposite of what he means all the time?
You'd be surprised how much time and energy you have to be a spiteful narrative control freak when you sacrifice your streaming career, cooking, cleaning, taking care of your kids, addressing your wife's emotional needs, etc while suppressing the negative emotions associated with such actions with substance abuse.
 
So apparently urine tests are bad for alcohol testing because people have an autobrewery function in their gut. Nick testing positive for alcohol on his UA submitted to the court is not an issue...
my body is a machine that turns sugar into alcohol.png
- Rekieta locals discord, 2024. (but probably also locals)
 
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Just making sure I get this right, the bodycam footage is likely sealed from us because of the CHIPS case.
It's not. I don't know what Nick is saying in private but it was pretty clear what his new line was going to be based on his word salad clip. Here are the facts:
  1. The footage was provided as discovery for his separate criminal case, possibly in addition to the CHIPS case.​
  2. Rekieta could also sign his name to a request for the county to release the footage rather than doing it himself.​
It appears that in private Nick abandoned the implication that it would be a direct violation of the stipulated protective order for discovery in the CHIPS case and instead said merely that, in light of the order, it would look bad.

It's worth noting that the order has been agreed to for about 2 months at this point. He didn't mention it as a reason before.
 
I imagine it's a tick or double-speak similar as to his typical "I wish you make a million dollars". Where you can definetelly tell that he means exactly the opposite but he stills has plausible deniability whenever a thrid party asks him if he really does wish you a gorillion dollars. His cooked lawyer brain thinks that he's playing everyone with that weird form of double-meaning, but he only makes himself look like a snotty child. In this case I assume that "peace" translates to "fuck you!" or "go fuck yourself" in Balldo speak / Balldo-nesse.
In the balldorealm peace is war, millionares are poor, monogomy is polygamy, sobriety is drunkenness, whats funny isn't funny, and mandys are men.

The only constant is that Nick will forever be a lying liar that lies.
 
Rekieta could also sign his name to a request for the county to release the footage rather than doing it himself.​
This is one of the examples of him being slimy and using lawyerspeak. In interviews he'll say he hasn't had any requests to sign anything to release the footage. However I don't think Josh sent him anything to sign, he just said Nick COULD sign a release.
 
This is one of the examples of him being slimy and using lawyerspeak. In interviews he'll say he hasn't had any requests to sign anything to release the footage. However I don't think Josh sent him anything to sign, he just said Nick COULD sign a release.
He's going to play that game until someone puts the release in front of him, pen in hand, notary observing, and signature areas labeled. Though I'm curious how he'd attempt to weasel out of that scenario.
 
He's going to play that game until someone puts the release in front of him, pen in hand, notary observing, and signature areas labeled. Though I'm curious how he'd attempt to weasel out of that scenario.
What makes this especially disgusting is that if this where anyone else - ANYONE esle - he would've already done three streams berating and antagonizing the defendants for not consenting so he could have more superchat content. Pre-tailspin Nick would've been all over this case every day making all the same jokes we are if it were any other internet celeb.
 
It's not. I don't know what Nick is saying in private but it was pretty clear what his new line was going to be based on his word salad clip. Here are the facts:
  1. The footage was provided as discovery for his separate criminal case, possibly in addition to the CHIPS case.​
  2. Rekieta could also sign his name to a request for the county to release the footage rather than doing it himself.​
It appears that in private Nick abandoned the implication that it would be a direct violation of the stipulated protective order for discovery in the CHIPS case and instead said merely that, in light of the order, it would look bad.

It's worth noting that the order has been agreed to for about 2 months at this point. He didn't mention it as a reason before.
But the state can still give it to Null for the previously agreed upon fee?
 
The part of his brain that runs his self control is desperately trying to convince the rest of him he needs to end the conversation, but he physically can't.

Chemically castrating his inhibitions is going to be the death of him.
There has got to be something weird going on in his brain. Comparing MRI's pre and post cocaine would be fascinating.
 
August 21st can’t come soon enough. I imagine Rekieta will be giving Null a flurry of shower texts to set the stage for how the Farms should expect the trial to go
The trial proper won't start on August 21st, but I expect the insanity will start in earnest then (as if it hasn't already).

Among other things the Omnibus hearing is supposed to determine what evidence will come in. If Frank is the Barneswalker he appears to be, the argument over the warrant should be crazy and fun.

I want to see Barnes flip the fuck out when it's exposed that the U.S. Constitution doesn't say what he wants people (read: idiots) to think it says.

We had a really hostile back and forth this time.
What gobsmacks me is he's still trying to gaslight you.

Does he really expect you to do his bidding at this point? Can this faggot not take the hint? What is he expecting?

"Okay guys, I've thought it over, and I have decided to to put on the Balldo. The thread is being moved back to Multimedia. All criticism of Nick is banned. @AltisticRight has been fired. Your new jannies are CGoody and Doctor Colonel Field Marshal Spectre."

Yeah, right.

For a guy who claims people don't understand social cues, he has about as good an understanding of them as Ethan Ralph. Maybe even worse at this point.

It's clear Nick's other great addiction is dopamine. That's the reason he insists on continuing to stream- he needs that hit, it only he wasn't so lazy he'd be getting it even more!
Which, owing to MNpublicrecords, that addiction might be actually be more damaging to his public image right now.

That's why I don't really care if MPR is technically drip-feeding. Because I know you won't have to wait very long for the next drip.

EDIT: Typo.
 
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