Culture Tinder and Bumble are tanking because they treat men badly, Grindr CEO said - Dating apps have been accused of weaponizing men’s frustration to make them pay more rather than helping them find love.

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“I’m not even their target audience,” Arison – who is gay – said. “But still, as a guy, I’m offended.”

Dating apps like Tinder and Bumble are neglecting their male users, Grindr CEO George Arison charged this week.

“One of the things that strikes me about how Bumble and Tinder approach the world is that frankly, they don’t treat 70% of their users very well,” Arison said in an interview with Polina Pompliano, founder of media company The Profile. The two were speaking at Fortune’s annual Brainstorm Tech conference in Park City, Utah.

Men outnumber women roughly 3-to-1 on both Bumble and Tinder, yet those apps don’t try to improve or smooth men’s often-awkward experience, Arison said. Even though men are the ones who more often pay for premium services, he said, their experience remains frustrating, leading many to quit online dating.

That exodus pans out in research: 79% of college students and other Gen Zers – in the age group that is by far dating apps’ largest audience – are forgoing regular dating app usage for in-person interactions, according to an Axios and Generation Lab study from October 2023.

In light of that decline, apps are “missing an opportunity” to expand their audience, Arison said.

“You have this huge percentage of men who are looking to settle down and looking to find a partner, and they are very captive to the product when they’re there. Why not build a lot of features for them?” Arison asked.

Arison’s not alone in being puzzled. Connell Barrett, founder of coaching site Dating Transformation and a popular dating advisor on Instagram, told Fortune that the features dating apps provide to men don’t actually end up helping them. In his 20 years of advising men, he has never seen men be “more frustrated, fatigued, and just burnt out” with dating apps than now, he said. He attributes this fatigue to an inequality in the app – about 20% of men are getting the majority of matches, a figure that a Hinge analyst leaked, then quickly deleted, in 2017.

“The ones who create a really good, compelling profile, they’re getting most of the matches,” Barrett said. “That means that 80% of the men are really struggling, and these are good, attractive, dateable, amazing men – I know because they’re my clients – and so I would love to see the dating apps take a more democratic view on how to help them.”

That help could come in the form of AI-generated dating advice or a feature that allows men to talk to a dating therapist in the app, Barrett offered. Instead, apps utilize men’s frustration for their own benefit, he said.

Dating apps’ approach is, “we’re going to ask you to upgrade to the top tier membership and give us more money, and maybe that will help you get more matches,” Barrett said. “But that doesn’t work. A problematic profile that is upgraded from gold to platinum is not going to be a more effective profile.”


More money, more matches?

Users of all genders have accused apps like Hinge of “hiding” the most attractive profiles, unless they pay for a premium service. Hinge’s CEO denied that the app has an attractiveness score, but the app does feature “Standout” profiles, which are the ones “getting the most attention” and which a free user would have a harder chance of matching with. You can only reach out to one “Standout” a week, unless you decide to purchase more features.

While Hinge says this makes the dating pool both more efficient and “intentional,” it’s undeniable that the “Standouts” gamifies users’ experience on the app by increasing competition and incentivizing them to pay for upgraded services.

That could be leading to the burnout that Barrett says is impacting men now more than ever.

Initiatives like these prove that executives are only focused on women’s experience, according to Arison. In fact, he added that the way that executives talk about men on earnings calls with investors “is actually really negative, to the point where they’re offensive to them.”

“I’m not even their target audience,” Arison – who is gay – said with a chuckle. “But still, as a guy, I’m offended.”

He didn’t expand more on what he heard on earnings calls. However, comments from a May earning call with Match Group CEO Bernard Kim indicate an extensive focus on women’s experience on dating apps while not mentioning male users.

“Gen Z and women, and women’s experience in particular is our top priority,” Kim said. “They are literally the most critical demographic for all dating apps. We know that women need to feel empowered and respected when they’re on our apps.” (Match Group owns Tinder, Hinge, OKCupid and other dating apps.)

Women report much higher rates of harassment on dating apps than men do, according to a 2020 Pew Research study. But dating apps can improve women’s experience, while also focusing on men, Arison said.

“You can make a great experience for someone without making a bad experience for someone else,” Arison said.

Update, Jul. 19, 2024: This article has been updated to include comments from a Hinge spokesperson.




Timestamp when he answers the question.


Well, he's not wrong, even if he's gay. I've already shared a similar study, but for women. All in all, I think dating apps as a whole are for many other things, but not for dating, and both men and women are realizing that.
 
“You can make a great experience for someone without making a bad experience for someone else,” Arison said.


This is all pretty funny coming from the guy who's overseen the flooding of trannies and pooners onto grindr. There's even straight non-pooner women on it now. So in the same way you accuse tinder of neglecting men, you neglected actual gay men.
 
The purpose of Grindr is to spread gay male degeneracy to the world and the purpose of the other apps is to make money
In that interview he talks about a bunch of features that I've had no idea Grindr has. "Gayborhood"? trip planning?

Indeed, it sure revolves around spreading fags far and wide.

But even with all that - he's got a point, that no similar app for straight people has gotten anywhere near that kind of innovation.

Straightbros/straightsisters... is it over?
 
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ive tried a few of these dating apps. i found the experience sucked and gave up. most men who try them tend to have similar results. im not sure ive ever met any guy who has had any good dating from these apps. some of them get a hook up or two off tinder, but when it comes to actual dates? not really.
 
Dating apps are failing because they don't work.
Speak for yourself. They're not really dating apps, they're matchmaking programs. They don't work for straight men because they take most awkward and difficult interaction a man could have (seducing and getting to know a woman) and depersonalize it. The ease of initial contact comes at the expense of controlling how you present yourself. You don't learn anything from getting swiped left.

It's not a problem on gay apps because gay men can already exchange a symposiums worth of information through eye contact alone. It's not the same with women.
 
How's that saying go... "If the app is free, you're the product"? More people need to remember that.
They work for femoids.
Not really, all of them are going after the top 20 percent of male profiles which makes it easy for those guys to date n' dump all but the top 20 percent of women. For the women that naturally look like they stumbled off a Sports Illustrated Swimsuit shoot or one of those fancy-pants Vogue covers yeah, it works great. Otherwise it's just a little better than the average man's experience, which is like online job hunting but with personal rejections.
 
Well, he's not wrong, even if he's gay.
He's literally wrong because he's gay. There's an overabundance of "bottoms" in the hiv enthusiast community; everyone wants to be the fuckee, no one wants to be the fucker. He thinks women are gay bottoms. He's puzzled why straight fuckers aren't in higher demand. They aren't because women largely aren't whores, and successful heterosexual users stop using The App.
 
In his 20 years of advising men, he has never seen men be “more frustrated, fatigued, and just burnt out” with dating apps than now, he said. He attributes this fatigue to an inequality in the app – about 20% of men are getting the majority of matches, a figure that a Hinge analyst leaked, then quickly deleted, in 2017.

“The ones who create a really good, compelling profile, they’re getting most of the matches,” Barrett said. “That means that 80% of the men are really struggling, and these are good, attractive, dateable, amazing men – I know because they’re my clients – and so I would love to see the dating apps take a more democratic view on how to help them.”
Is this really the apps fault or women's preferences being expressed? Unfortunately society awards non-monogamous relationships nowadays.
 
But even with all that - he's got a point, that no similar app for straight people has gotten anywhere near that kind of innovation.
Because most women are looking for relationships while most men (including gay men) are looking for hookups. Hence why an app for gay men has a higher success rate for its users, because you don't have a situation where half the userbase wants something different than the other half.
 
The ones who create a really good, compelling profile, they’re getting most of the matches,” Barrett said. “That means that 80% of the men are really struggling, and these are good, attractive, dateable, amazing men – I know because they’re my clients – and so I would love to see the dating apps take a more democratic view on how to help them.”

I was expecting this to be about trannies. But it's just guys too autistic to make a good profile. Maybe they accidentally make themselves sound creepy?

This is all pretty funny coming from the guy who's overseen the flooding of trannies and pooners onto grindr. There's even straight non-pooner women on it now. So in the same way you accuse tinder of neglecting men, you neglected actual gay men.

Why are straight women on Grindr? Fujos?
 
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