💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

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When will Jack drop dead?

  • February-March 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%

  • April-May 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%

  • June-July 2024

    Votes: 17 1.1%

  • August-September 2024

    Votes: 34 2.2%

  • October-November 2024

    Votes: 37 2.4%

  • December 2024

    Votes: 44 2.8%

  • Sometime in 2025

    Votes: 258 16.6%

  • Sometime in 2026

    Votes: 252 16.2%

  • Jack lives forever. The Wendigo Must Consoom

    Votes: 902 58.0%
  • Total voters
    1,556
@Falcon Sebben Yes. It not only creates memory issues but personality changes as well. They will get upset more easily, and will have more trouble following things like movies and tv shows. They get overstimulated easily, more impulsive, etc. personality changes are seen before memory changes, like forgetting to pay bills.

You’ll know if he has it when he forgets what knives are used for, or kitchen appliances.
 
Falcon Sebben said:
He can't even work the slide which is why he's said he's got a gun by his bed and it's not only loaded but cocked and ready to be fired. In other words dangerous as fuck.
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If we're lucky, TamHam Jack cheaped out and got a Taurus. There's a chance it'd spontaneously fire when he lets out a fart in his sleep and get him right in the face.
 
Falcon Sebben said:
He can't even work the slide which is why he's said he's got a gun by his bed and it's not only loaded but cocked and ready to be fired. In other words dangerous as fuck. Nobody who has an ounce of respect for the gun would leave it like that. But in his case he's got no choice. He can't load it, flick off the safety, aim and fire without taking several minutes.
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If it's the Ruger LCP that's been mentioned several times in the thread, then it's just as safe to keep in condition 0 as any other striker-fired handgun.
 
Super Hans v2 said:
If we're lucky, TamHam Jack cheaped out and got a Taurus. There's a chance it'd spontaneously fire when he lets out a fart in his sleep and get him right in the face.
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We can only hope. My real feeling is he'd accidentally shoot himself in his gimp leg and doesn't realize it until much later.

Rinascere said:
If it's the Ruger LCP that's been mentioned several times in the thread, then it's just as safe to keep in condition 0 as any other striker-fired handgun.
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Maybe. I'll admit I don't know that much about guns but if Fatty is as careful with it as he is with the rest of his stuff I'd be surprised if it was kept in good working condition.
 
EatBeforeYouEat said:
View attachment 6248547

So Jack ate up a made up story about a million Christians protesting the olympics for disrespecting Christianity. The 2nd sentence is great because I'd imagine even the less religious churchgoers would show up for that. I'm guessing at Jack's church everyone is aware that a certain member likes to volunteer to cook for the events and serves up raw meat.
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There aren't even a million Christians left in France, the retard.
 
saralovesjuicyfruit said:
Nah, he's gotta fire up a new series, GAS WARS. Instead of making Tammy take a bite out of 12 different items from Subway, he rides passenger while she buys a tank of gas each at various gas stations and then they drive around until they run out, with Jack timing the longevity of teach tank of gas.
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You're joking but I actually can see Jack doing this just because it's something he doesn't have to do cooking with and it allows him to be a miser. It's why he did Playing with your Food originally after all.
 
p1138 said:
lol, well it's not like Fatty has driven in years. If something isn't specifically relevant to him then he doesn't bother to really pay attention to it. The only shit he's concerned about at a gas station is maybe the jerky(which he probably cant eat anymore due to the swallowing issues), or the wings and other junk that sits for hours all day in the hot food display.

But even if this gas could magically burn twice as fast, halving your mpg, he doesn't understand that everyone else would have noticed and complained by now. Not that it's possible for it to even do that. It's just more fatspiracy shit as he tries to rationalize the dumbest shit possible rattling around in his mush brain.
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Im Guessing that the trophy truck is about to have a stroke of it’s own…
Rinascere said:
If it's the Ruger LCP that's been mentioned several times in the thread, then it's just as safe to keep in condition 0 as any other striker-fired handgun.
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that’s what Tammy has, a purple one of course.

Given her sausage fingers, 10 rings per hand, and general lack of practice and proficiency, the only thing she will manage to hit with the thing is herself or the dog by accident. The LCP is extremely small, and as a result, unforgiving to novice shooters. Her gun is basically a talisman against danger.
Power level…. I have one and only carry it in very limited use cases when I can’t carry anything larger. I practice handgun shooting a lot (independently, and with professional trainers) . The LCP takes a lot of effort to become and remain proficient with. But there are millions of them out there in women’s purses in purple, pink, and Tiffany blue that have been shot 2-3 times for practice at most, they are probably full of lint and can’t shoot anyways. “Pink it and shrink it” is an effective marketing strategy.


I think that Jack was smart enough to buy a revolver so that he could actually load it without blowing a hole in his leg or gut. So yeah, probably something retarded like a Taurus Judge because the ability to chamber multiple calibers would appeal dummy, especially since it can handle 410 gauge shotshells. So “Donna have to eben aim”

Tiresome said:
There aren't even a million Christians left in France, the retard.
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That’s an exaggeration. But to wit, they are mostly all catholic. Which fatty fails to recognize.


Adamska said:
You're joking but I actually can see Jack doing this just because it's something he doesn't have to do cooking with and it allows him to be a miser. It's why he did Playing with your Food originally after all.
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Jack loves getting vocally angy at massive corporations for slighting him, shortchanging him, or insulting his intelligence. I think he would fit in nicely with Bernie Bros with all of the suspicion and anger he has for corporations. But then he also simultaneously gobbles their cocks consoooming
 
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TheCakeIsALie said:
You’ll know if he has it when he forgets what knives are used for, or kitchen appliances.
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How could he forget what he never knew?
Uber driver reviewer said:
That’s an exaggeration. But to wit, they are mostly all catholic. Which fatty fails to recognize.
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And on top of that there weren't huge demonstrations. It was mostly some bishops pointing out it was incredibly offensive. Frankly, if you defiled Muhammad like that not only would you be prosecuted for hate crimes, you'd probably be publicly murdered too.
 
EMERGENCY ALERT SYSTEM

NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE

Issued a

SEVERE BRAP FRONT WARNING
The national weather service has detected a severe weather event in your area and has issued the following message: Warning! The national weather service has issued a severe brap front warning for the following counties: Robertson, Cheatham, Nashville, Wilson, Rutherford and Williamson until 11:30 PM. The national weather service detected Jack Scalfani leaving Arby's at approximately 6:45 PM with over 15 items in tow. Brap fronts are caused by the anal discharge of digestive gasses and can cause wind speeds of over 600 miles per hour and can cause severe damage to property and human life. Residents are advised to seek shelter in low land areas or anywhere that can provide shelter from high wind speeds. The national weather service predicts an anal pucker factor of 19 with a brap length of 29 degrees.
 
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Adamska said:
You're joking but I actually can see Jack doing this just because it's something he doesn't have to do cooking with and it allows him to be a miser. It's why he did Playing with your Food originally after all.
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I have to admit I stole this joke from my boyfriend, after I showed him the BJ's gas thing. The reason it was so hilarious when he said it was because, like you said, I could actually kind of see Jack doing this, with the same self-righteous indignation he had in his Magic Bullet review, as well as the 'playing with your food' series as you mentioned.
 
AltisticRight said:
Ah yes, we feed prisoners stuff that's not only time consuming to prepare but also generally more expensive. Where's your citation, fat boy?
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prison has a long history of under feeding their prisoners slop food. if it's "plant" based food, it's most likely from the face their meal is a little bit of pasta and bread. it's uncommon for jails/prisons to offer a lot of meat.
 
AltisticRight said:
Ah yes, we feed prisoners stuff that's not only time consuming to prepare but also generally more expensive. Where's your citation, fat boy? Is it the same as supermarkets secretly selling lab meat as real and hospitals tracking KPIs for the number of patients they murdered for population control?
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The Southwest Strangla said:
prison has a long history of under feeding their prisoners slop food. if it's "plant" based food, it's most likely from the face their meal is a little bit of pasta and bread. it's uncommon for jails/prisons to offer a lot of meat.
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I think he's referring to nutraloaf, which was a big deal on boomer news in 2015 or something, which to Jack's nonlinear perception of time is tomorrow.
 
Sneedmiser said:
I think he's referring to nutraloaf, which was a big deal on boomer news in 2015 or something, which to Jack's nonlinear perception of time is tomorrow.
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Sounds like it's lacking 2 pounds of Wal-Mart cheese on top so it might as well be sodium cyanide or a salad to Scalfani.
 
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