- Joined
- Mar 23, 2022
The Child Neglecting Lolyer
Oh, they stink a fair bit, but you realize that
He claims it's the lies of some Christian prudes
Since the cops burst inside and held his childs hand tight
He'll do some copesplaining tonight
With his Forest Gump haircut, we'll laugh at this coomer
Until he seethes with internal narc rage
Watch his nose become redder as he becomes madder
Reading the troll chats from his former fans
From the sex stores of Spicer to the floors of gay 90's
There's no one who neglects a child better than Nick
So he'll pour out a glass, show the whole world his ass
And win Julays two years in a row
Oh, his lady's a goblin and she spends all her time
With reruns of Star Trek pilled out of her mind
As the wife of a cokehead, it ensures that they have
No time and no care to provide for their kids
So pour out your scorn, a troll chat or a comment
The seething will flow when he sees what you say
Post his mugshot in chat and remind him he's fat
As we hear the copesplaining tonight
From the sex stores of Spicer to the floors of gay 90's
There's no one who neglects a child better than Nick
So he'll pour out a glass, show the whole world his ass
And win Julays two years in a row
Oh, the guests are ball washers, they come for subscribers
But end up short changed every time they appear
Cos the reason that we watch is the one who can't pull up
Who's currently crashing his life and career
Original
Oh, they stink a fair bit, but you realize that
He claims it's the lies of some Christian prudes
Since the cops burst inside and held his childs hand tight
He'll do some copesplaining tonight
With his Forest Gump haircut, we'll laugh at this coomer
Until he seethes with internal narc rage
Watch his nose become redder as he becomes madder
Reading the troll chats from his former fans
From the sex stores of Spicer to the floors of gay 90's
There's no one who neglects a child better than Nick
So he'll pour out a glass, show the whole world his ass
And win Julays two years in a row
Oh, his lady's a goblin and she spends all her time
With reruns of Star Trek pilled out of her mind
As the wife of a cokehead, it ensures that they have
No time and no care to provide for their kids
So pour out your scorn, a troll chat or a comment
The seething will flow when he sees what you say
Post his mugshot in chat and remind him he's fat
As we hear the copesplaining tonight
From the sex stores of Spicer to the floors of gay 90's
There's no one who neglects a child better than Nick
So he'll pour out a glass, show the whole world his ass
And win Julays two years in a row
Oh, the guests are ball washers, they come for subscribers
But end up short changed every time they appear
Cos the reason that we watch is the one who can't pull up
Who's currently crashing his life and career
Original
Oh, he drinks a fair bit but you realize that
It just helps get his noggin a joggin' along
With his glass by his side and his kids asleep tight
We'll hear some lawsplaining tonight
With his microphone muted, we'll laugh at this boomer
Until he explains that it part of the plan
Watch his face become redder as he becomes madder
Raging at idiots from Twit and Er land
From the white shores of Nairn to the Hills of Glenlivet
There's no-one who 'splains the law better than nick
So pour out a glass for the ones who have passed
To make the law what we have now
Oh, his lady is fair, and she handles herself
With the grace of one who has born many children
As the wife of a law man, she makes sure that he has
The time and place to provide for them there
So pour out an Ardbeg, a bowmore, or laphroig
The spirits flow as the ones sued get unemployed
So pour out a glass for the deposed on Twitter
As we hear lawspaining Tonight
From the white shores of Nairn to the Hills of Glenlivet
There's no-one who 'splains the law better than nick
So pour out a glass for the ones who have passed
To make the law what we have now
Oh, the guests are all plentiful, from Doug T to Drexel
They bring their perspective and spice to the mix
But the reason we're here and the one that we cheer
Is the one who is showcasing us his career
It just helps get his noggin a joggin' along
With his glass by his side and his kids asleep tight
We'll hear some lawsplaining tonight
With his microphone muted, we'll laugh at this boomer
Until he explains that it part of the plan
Watch his face become redder as he becomes madder
Raging at idiots from Twit and Er land
From the white shores of Nairn to the Hills of Glenlivet
There's no-one who 'splains the law better than nick
So pour out a glass for the ones who have passed
To make the law what we have now
Oh, his lady is fair, and she handles herself
With the grace of one who has born many children
As the wife of a law man, she makes sure that he has
The time and place to provide for them there
So pour out an Ardbeg, a bowmore, or laphroig
The spirits flow as the ones sued get unemployed
So pour out a glass for the deposed on Twitter
As we hear lawspaining Tonight
From the white shores of Nairn to the Hills of Glenlivet
There's no-one who 'splains the law better than nick
So pour out a glass for the ones who have passed
To make the law what we have now
Oh, the guests are all plentiful, from Doug T to Drexel
They bring their perspective and spice to the mix
But the reason we're here and the one that we cheer
Is the one who is showcasing us his career
Don't need to drive your kids around if you can't drive
