- Joined
- Jan 2, 2024
A lot of people who go through trauma try to rationalize it by convincing themselves that it helped make them stronger and more independent, and they tend to attribute future perceived successes to their ability to overcome their trauma. Ultimately, however, that is just a mechanism we use to protect ourselves emotionally and to provide a sense of closure to our experiences. Hence we are all too willing to project those experiences onto others and give them a positive spin, even going as far as feeling thankful for that experience. Hardship is a part of growth and learning, but let us not lose sight of the fact that there's different kinds of hardships.
EVS appears to be projecting his own shitty experience with junkie parents and having to take care of siblings without parental guidance onto the Rekieta children. He has protected himself from that trauma by seeing it as a net positive, re: "it made me self-reliant and thus paved the way to my future success". I don't really have the energy to get upset at someone like that. It's simply a sad situation all around, and what he is saying is a direct consequence of his own lamentable experiences.
At the end of the day, it is hard to argue that pushing children into that situation of traumatic hardship, even if it forces them to learn useful skills or become stronger emotionally, over healthy and able parenting, is preferable. Nobody would say that children should have junkie parents at a certain stage of their lives, but that is the implication of saying that there is nothing wrong with the situation. There is a scenario that was obviously preferable, and the parents' actions are the only reason that scenario was not possible. No matter how you look at it, it is at the very least a prime example of parental failure.
EVS appears to be projecting his own shitty experience with junkie parents and having to take care of siblings without parental guidance onto the Rekieta children. He has protected himself from that trauma by seeing it as a net positive, re: "it made me self-reliant and thus paved the way to my future success". I don't really have the energy to get upset at someone like that. It's simply a sad situation all around, and what he is saying is a direct consequence of his own lamentable experiences.
At the end of the day, it is hard to argue that pushing children into that situation of traumatic hardship, even if it forces them to learn useful skills or become stronger emotionally, over healthy and able parenting, is preferable. Nobody would say that children should have junkie parents at a certain stage of their lives, but that is the implication of saying that there is nothing wrong with the situation. There is a scenario that was obviously preferable, and the parents' actions are the only reason that scenario was not possible. No matter how you look at it, it is at the very least a prime example of parental failure.