💪 Tough Guys Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

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Honestly, how the fuck he keeps the lights on at home? I doubt his wife is able to afford groceries and the bills and the toys all by herself and I really fucking doubt his books bring more than 200$ a month on royalties.
 
AN/ALR56 said:
Honestly, how the fuck he keeps the lights on at home? I doubt his wife is able to afford groceries and the bills and the toys all by herself and I really fucking doubt his books bring more than 200$ a month on royalties.
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Likely the bank of Niki's parents. Pat is a terminal NEET who is unemployable. He is too weak and lazy for manual labour, and you couldn't trust him to work solo and do something competently. Despite this, he thinks such work is beneath him.
 
I would genuinely go to a Patrick Tomlinson themed bar/restaurant, and I would pay good money for the Pat mugs by Mr Badger

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Another new normie Patposter describes the experience of meeting Stealthygeek for the first time.
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Then as if by magic, Pat himself appears.
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Stephanie Bustcakes said:
I hope the gay retards who do this stuff actually get sued by Patrick and he wins. There is a reason we don't allow trolling plans and harassment on the Kiwi Farms.
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Please stop. You barely post in this thread, and when you do, is just pearl clutching.

I understand your point, but they are not posting here, they are over there. Not only that, please remember Patrick belongs to them, not us. Ona is not feces-touching, at this point they are part of Patverse just as much as Patrick himself.

If you don't like them or their actions that's fine, but in that case you'll just complain about 90% of this thread, and will not enjoy it at all.

I get your intentions but the unnecessary complaining, pearl clutching and holier-than-thou attitude by people who are barely here is the reason a lot of patposters (including myself) stopped contributing and caring about the thread.

Pat is a harmless feel-good kinda of cow. Just try to enjoy him, don't ruin other people's fun.
 
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I have a hypothetical question:

Suppose you're a little black boy in the ghetto, and you've stayed up well past your bedtime learning to be a gangsta pimp and sheeeit. You're walking home when you hear a pig squeal. You look up and you see a rotund pig-man hybrid glaring down at you from a hill. You say, "Aw hell naw craka I'm goin' home fer da day." The pig, in response, squeals, "Wrong, child!" and begins rolling down the hill towards you with increasingly alarming speed. Like the boulder scene in Indiana Jones, only with more fat. What would you do?

Hypothetically, of course.
 
I'mThePatMan! said:
Please stop. You barely post in this thread, and when you do, is just pearl clutching.

I understand your point, but they are not posting here, they are over there. Not only that, please remember Patrick belongs to them, not us. Ona is not feces-touching, at this point they are part of Patverse just as much as Patrick himself.

If you don't like them or their actions that's fine, but in that case you'll just complain about 90% of this thread, and will not enjoy it at all.

I get your intentions but the unnecessary complaining, pearl clutching and holier-than-thou attitude by people who are barely here is the reason a lot of patposters (including myself) stopped contributing and caring about the thread.
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Wrong as always, stalker. I am not pearl clutching or moralfagging. You missed my point entirety. I'm sorry you're so stupid. Enjoy prison.
 
Stephanie Bustcakes said:
Wrong as always, stalker. I am not pearl clutching or moralfagging. You missed my point entirety. I'm sorry you're so stupid. Enjoy prison.
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Lol either way, good one. Touché, I can't argue with that answer, you know why?
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You've already been told many hundreds of thousands of times to not act like an adult taking constructive criticism in good sport, stalker.

Enjoy the thread-prison baby child.
 
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Sexy Senior Citizen said:
I have a hypothetical question:

Suppose you're a little black boy in the ghetto, and you've stayed up well past your bedtime learning to be a gangsta pimp and sheeeit. You're walking home when you hear a pig squeal. You look up and you see a rotund pig-man hybrid glaring down at you from a hill. You say, "Aw hell naw craka I'm goin' home fer da day." The pig, in response, squeals, "Wrong, child!" and begins rolling down the hill towards you with increasingly alarming speed. Like the boulder scene in Indiana Jones, only with more fat. What would you do?

Hypothetically, of course.
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Depends on if I had breakfast that day.
 
John Andrews Stan said:
Throw my newly procured Skittles on the ground and watch as Pat slips, falls, and cracks his head open. Probably have my phone open getting video of the action.
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I’d point my gun sideways at him and accidentally shoot the school kids on the other side of the street. I’d probably then go home and eat cornstarch.
 
Sexy Senior Citizen said:
I have a hypothetical question:

Suppose you're a little black boy in the ghetto, and you've stayed up well past your bedtime learning to be a gangsta pimp and sheeeit. You're walking home when you hear a pig squeal. You look up and you see a rotund pig-man hybrid glaring down at you from a hill. You say, "Aw hell naw craka I'm goin' home fer da day." The pig, in response, squeals, "Wrong, child!" and begins rolling down the hill towards you with increasingly alarming speed. Like the boulder scene in Indiana Jones, only with more fat. What would you do?

Hypothetically, of course.
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Yo, lemme paint you da picture, aight? So, I'm strollin' through the block, mindin' my own bidness, when suddenly, I hear dis loud squeal. My eyes shoot up and I see dis big ol' pig-man lookin' like he just stepped outta some twisted fairytale. I ain't stickin' 'round for no bedtime stories, nah mean?

So, I holla back at dat pig-man, like, "Aw hell naw, craka, I ain't playin' witchu!" But dis pig ain't backin' down, no sir. He hits me back with some squealin' gibberish, talkin' 'bout I'm wrong or whatever. Next thing I know, dis dude starts rollin' down dat hill like a runaway train, except he's more bacon than metal.

Now, I ain't 'bout to be no bacon sandwich, so I gotta think fast. I dip, duck, dive, and dodge, dodgin' and weavin' like I'm in a street brawl. I find me a dumpster or a fire escape or somethin', anythin' to hide behind. Ain't no way I'm lettin' no pig-man steamroll me today, nah mean? So, I lay low until dat porker passes by, then I book it home like my life depends on it. Ain't no bedtime worth tanglin' with a pig on steroids, you feel me?
 
I swear to fucking god fatrick has annihilated my sense of humor.
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Literally the laziest and most weenish baiting imaginable not only gets me sNIGGERing but results in him waddling over to oink empty threats like fucking clockwork
 
At this point I don't have any care in the world for what Brothermen do to Patrick, which typically isn't anything worse than texting him or using his name on "Contact us" forms.

The solution to this problem is extremely simple and long overdue, but Patrick of course won't do this because DLTIW and adult ODD. It is also because he's fat.
 
Judge Holden said:
I swear to fucking god fatrick has annihilated my sense of humor.
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Literally the laziest and most weenish baiting imaginable not only gets me sNIGGERing but results in him waddling over to oink empty threats like fucking clockwork
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Rick always brings a smile to my face. I'm curious as to the current leading theory on why he injects himself into third-party interactions? We know he's obsessed with getting the last word in a conversation, but for the life of me I still can't grasp what he has to gain from stalker-childing all these low-effort trolls. How does he not realize that, to a rational observer, he comes off as completely demented?
:stress:
 
deadtofaunus said:
Rick always brings a smile to my face. I'm curious as to the current leading theory on why he injects himself into third-party interactions? We know he's obsessed with getting the last word in a conversation, but for the life of me I still can't grasp what he has to gain from stalker-childing all these low-effort trolls. How does he not realize that, to a rational observer, he comes off as completely demented?
:stress:
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You see, child, to Patrick, bodyfat equals both social engineering privilege and superhuman intelligence. As he becomes an even fatter faggot with more pendulous bitch tits, he knows he's the sole arbiter of social etiquette, foreign policy, fictional writing, relationship dynamics, warrior philosophy, and military doctrine. He was born to do this, stalker, and he's quite sorry you're too stupid to realize this too.

Wait for the knock that signifies the beginning of an enjoyable prison sentence.
 
Latest newsreel from the Fatafuck front: Anyone who stops patposting only ever does so because they are ENJOYING PRISON STALKER
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The message is clear. We have to loudly and regularly call Patrick a fat faggot (with bitch tits) for the rest of our lives if we wish to avoid the dreaded stalker prison.

Its like the movie It Follows, but instead of getting rawdogged outside a 7/11 to throw off an unkillable sex demon we have to keep taunting a rotund queer who thinks he's a Joss Whedon protagonist over the internet to throw off the cyberpolice
 
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