💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[AnOminous]

Nice job peeling them, ya gimpy tard.

I doubt he could do even that. That's a Hammy job.

 

[I am Jack's dead arm]

I doubt he could do even that. That's a Hammy job.

He also probably didn't want to wait for them to cool down so they'd be easier to peel.

 

[Aunt Carol]

Does he just have those eggs on his sofa?

It's an Ashens tribute.

 

[REGENDarySumanai]

He's going to speedrun his way into the record books for having the most strokes.

 

[indomitable snowman]

Jack is like 5'4 but there's no way he's only 278 pounds.

I'd say he's missing at least 100lbs on that lol.

 

[ZipDisk]

This is the most curtain pulled back Jack has ever been. Still doesn't admit he can't eat like a normal human.

The dysphagia saga has been long speculated about in this thread. Has anyone directly told him he needs to seek medical attention for that specifically?
(Not us obviously, but someone like Rob)

 

[Kuritan Deplorable]

I'd say he's missing at least 100lbs on that lol.

He only weighed the good side, he read that you don't wanna count deadweight

 

[AngeloTheWizard]

Nothing, I mean nothing beats a colonoscopy. Especially if you have lynch syndrome, a family history of colon cancer, etc.

Cologuard can detect 92% of cancers but only 42% of large precancerous polyps. It has its use but honestly, people need to get over the idea of being embarrassed and just get the damn colonoscopy. It’s a camera up your butt, which is way better than having colon cancer.

And if my dad's reaction was anything to go by, you may not remember a damn thing either! (That was different though, that was a laser to remove non cancerous polyps so he was probably on the good drugs but point stands, the human mind has an incredible gift to only remember what it wants)

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Why would you hard boil eggs for breakfast? It takes like, a minute to pan fry or scramble 'em. Its not like, awful, but it is just weird.

I'm guessing he got this from Charles as that's something he does so Fatty just copies him. Or any other style of egg and Fatty wants to have toast with it.

The reason for hard boiled eggs with folk that do these kinds of diets is they're portable, you can eat them with your fingers and you can make a large batch of them at one time.

1/1/24 Weight 278.6 BP 144/80 Sugar 163. Somehow I doubt Jack is 278 pounds, unless he is very short. The carnivore pizza is probably just going to be meat and cheese, the processed junk Jack normally eats.

He is that short. He's a manlet.

Jack is like 5'4 but there's no way he's only 278 pounds.

The Wendigo is a spirit so it makes him lighter. Without that thing keeping his body alive and using it as a puppet he'd weigh at least 325 and probably be dead.

 

[Tiresome]

Jack is like 5'4 but there's no way he's only 278 pounds.

It's also quite possible with the amount of gas rolling around in his ponderous gut at all times, methane being lighter than air, he might be lifted a bit.

 

[p1138]

1/1/24 Weight 278.6 BP 144/80 Sugar 163. Somehow I doubt Jack is 278 pounds, unless he is very short. The carnivore pizza is probably just going to be meat and cheese, the processed junk Jack normally eats.

This video has a rare clip of Fatty walking around out in the wild from a distance. You can actually see him walk past one of those big 48 inch industrial fans and stop at it for a rest. He's under 5'6" for sure. Also just look at how tall he isn't compared to everyone else.

You can also compare Fatty's height in this article from the Macy's regional cooking thing he didn't win

https://lynnwoodtoday.com/macys-county-fair-sizzle-showdown-draws-crowd

And then since the winner of that competition backed out of the final event in NYC, Fatty got to go and there's photos of him you can compare to more people

https://www.gettyimages.ca/photos/jack-scalfani

Once you also factor in how he is going to have next to no muscle at this point due to being such a sedentary lump, I wouldn't be surprised if he was around 280 pounds. Because he's so damn short, you can't compare him to a man closer to 6', a better comparison would be those 300+ pound fat women online(and quite a few of them were pushing 400) claiming fat is healthy and even most of them still move around more than Fatty does.

 

[boxybum]

Day 1 Carnivore Diet [qrorbfup-SY].webm
Jack request if you have any questions , just google it first. Happy new year losers.

Yeah, surely he needed to wait a year after his most recent stroke to finally change his diet and exercise. It doesn't make sense to make immediate changes. Just wait months and years before changing.

Just looking at his numbers. The guy is a midget 5 foot tall but weighs 279 pounds. Holy shit, no wonder he stroked out. And he isn't even as heavy as some of the deathfats on here. Jack Scalfani is a glimpse into the future of Foodie Beauty and Amberlyn.

 

[ZipDisk]

I have two new years concerns about Jack.
1. What if this diet is involuntary? He's claiming to be carnivore, but what if his doctors put him on some sort of regimen? Would that affect the LARP?

2. How hilariously will this new diet fuck with Jack on the Go? I know Tennessee isn't Atlanta, but I can't see many restaurants cooking to fatty's whims, let alone fast food joints.
I'd love to see him seethe if wenbys comes up with a triple decker bourbon beggin burgor.

 

[AnOminous]

2. How hilariously will this new diet fuck with Jack on the Go? I know Tennessee isn't Atlanta, but I can't see many restaurants cooking to fatty's whims, let alone fast food joints.

For a burger you'd just have to throw out the buns, not get ketchup or sweet sauces (fat chance), etc.

I can't imagine any doctor recommending a 4 stroke gimp a diet like this, unless they hate his guts so much they want to kill him.

 

[p1138]

2. How hilariously will this new diet fuck with Jack on the Go? I know Tennessee isn't Atlanta, but I can't see many restaurants cooking to fatty's whims, let alone fast food joints.

Fatty explained that in is last livestream at around the 8:50 mark. He's going to cough at gurgle at other people in restaurants to describe the taste of the food on camera while he just reviews the decor.

And of course his doctors have tried to put him on some sort of regimen, but if he never follows it(and it's obvious he doesn't) they'll just give up and quit wasting their time preaching to him about eating healthy. This carnivore larp bullshit is purely because his older healthier looking brother convinced him to do it and he's always salivated at the idea of eating nothing but meat cheese and grease with a "diet" being the excuse on his podcast whenever his brother would brag about not needing to brush his teeth or wipe his ass. The reality is, his family(not Tammy and JR) probably had a serious conversation with him explaining that no one thought he'd make it to 2025 with the carnivore shit for a month being a compromise. Also have to remember that charle's went and visited Fatty in TN for their hunting trip(for which Fatty just sat in the truck), something he had never done before.

 

[Adamska]

View attachment 5605109

It's amusing that he always somehow makes the cheese of his pizzas look like an infection somehow. Anyways, this literally isn't different from his usual slop. He'll just hide all his desserts and sweets and hope no one notices that the rubs he uses are full of sugar I bet.

I have two new years concerns about Jack.
1. What if this diet is involuntary? He's claiming to be carnivore, but what if his doctors put him on some sort of regimen? Would that affect the LARP?

2. How hilariously will this new diet fuck with Jack on the Go? I know Tennessee isn't Atlanta, but I can't see many restaurants cooking to fatty's whims, let alone fast food joints.
I'd love to see him seethe if wenbys comes up with a triple decker bourbon beggin burgor.

For some reason he really takes his loser of a brother seriously when Charles tries to A-log Jack by pretending he also isn't a loser. I fully expect this is just to stop being made fun of by a dude who unironically lets mail-order brides whisper to him about his prowess as a dragon or whatever other cringe shit has been added to his ASMR collection now.

He'll fail when his brain craves a cookie and he throws a baby tantrum over the "limits" imposed. So like a month at best.

 

[rubytintedchix]

This looks a mess. Probably used pre shredded bagged cheese. I’m guessing this ends up being one of those crustless pizza deals like he got from Papa Murphy’s.



edit: ninja’s by @densedance, sorry about that. But my point still stands.

 

[Seymour Duncan]

That is some seriously vile looking cheese, it looks like that "pizza mix" (that you can't even legally call cheese because it's 50 percent palm oil) you'd get in one of those really seedy pizzerias that totally aren't a front for tax evasion and abusing business grants.

 

[EatYourVeggies]

Jack Scalfani can never lose weight. Fat is the essence of his human flesh. There is no humanity left inside, only Wendigo. Fat is inseparable from Jagoff, fat IS Jagoff and Jagoff is fat. Jack Scalfani is ontologically fat.

 

[herefortheactualthreads]

this old man has THREE fucking strokes and continues to eat everything? jesus christ you gotta give respect to his stubbornness, why doesn't his family put him out of the misery?