Nick is a slave to his sin, and he relishes it. He thinks it’s funny to lick the bottle, make crude sex jokes at every opportunity, and that he is a man of great nuance for claiming Christianity but denigrating Christ’s diety.
A snippet from Rekieta's Sunday School, in which he provide's religious instruction to children in his home school cooperative.
Moses laid down just ten laws. A non-practicing shyster believed he'd found a loophole. "Thou shalt not bear false witness unless the person you're lying about can't afford to fund a defamation lawsuit. Then you can go ahead and lie with complete impunity."
For his sins, that shyster has been condemned to spergatory, forced to pay Randazza's ever-increasing legal bills for all eternity.
Next lesson: The wise and foolish wine moms.
There were ten wine moms in a locals group. All ten had brought the balldo, but five had forgotten to bring lube. As usual, Rekieta was late, and so the wine moms tired of listening to Still_Life's rape threats and fell asleep.
When Rekieta eventually arrived, five of the wine moms said "We have no lube. Give us some of your lube so that we too can partake of the balldo! But the other wine moms said "We don't have enough lube for our own. Go to the lube dealer and buy some more lube."
By the time that the five wine moms had returned, Rekieta had already finished his brief locals session. He'd praised Mandy's high school breasts and Sally's leathery butt. He'd flirted some with the old woman with the skid marks on her underwear, and bitched about Elissa destroying his business by posting clips of his ranting.
"We're back!" said the other five wine moms. "We've got our lube. Now we too must partake of the balldo."
But Rekieta refused to let them in, saying this: "Truly I say onto you. I do not know you. Your superchats are insufficient because despite my posting the time on twitter, you know neither the day nor the hour."
Here endeth today's lesson.
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