The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch / @TenaciousRanch / Steampunk Penny / Penellope Logue / Phillip Matthew Logue - Don't cry because it ended, laugh because it's still getting worse.

[A-Stump]

They need to call an exorcist out to that land

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

The Tranchers are still silent on social media.
Jen has resumed the Patreon updates; I assume he was just stressed or busy with the move previously. If - like me - you've ever been curious about what kind of content they put behind the Patreon paywall (but don't want to pay the Tranchers to find out), then feast your eyes:
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In this update post, you can see the youtube links which lead to unlisted videos on the Tranch's youtube channel.
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When I checked them out, there were no views and no comments on either video, despite the videos being posted two days ago. This tells me that the Tranch's Patrons don't really care about the Tranch's content... they probably just donate as a vague show of support and otherwise don't pay any attention. I also wouldn't be surprised if many of the donations are just recurring payments that have been forgotten about. It would explain why the Tranch Patreon hasn't really taken a hit despite the drama with Paul.

Here are the videos:
Everyone waiting for food [Y_WrO1nJQS8].webm
Paca in the snow [rUwG0YtMIC4].webm
It's just Penny and another troon (Kevin?) feeding the animals, same as always... riveting content.

What's interesting though is that they've clearly RELOCATED TO PENNY'S PARENTS' HOUSE!
And they're still being idiots, too. I count ~3 goats and 8-10 alpacas in these videos. That's still too many for a 5-acre plot! If they were going to keep any alpacas at all, they should've only kept 2-3. At least I don't see any sheep, thankfully. No Pepe the Vicuna either.

Spoiler: Clues showing they're at Penny's parents' house

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I’m still new to this whole Tranch thing, but I can’t tell if this is animal abuse or just an overwhelming amount of Tranchness is too much for Steampunk Jenny. You managed to take care of Alpacas, and yet only 10 survived?

The math doesn’t add up.

 

[LikeAStone 2.0]

The Chosen Alpacas.

Survivors of the Alpacaust. The last of their kind.

Not even the tales of Exodus were this bad.

Exodus 6:6
"Therefore, say to the Alpacas: `I am the LORD, and I will bring you out from under the yoke of the Trannies. I will free you from being slaves to them, and I will redeem you with an outstretched arm and with mighty acts of judgment.’”.

 

[anliteralidiot]

Yep. Someone posted a video a couple months ago about common mistakes new alpaca owners make, and keeping alpacas & goats together was one of them. Unlike llamas, alpacas apparently aren't very good at defending themselves, so they can easily get injured by aggressive goats.

Funnily... or I guess not so funnily, you can see a goat headbutting an alpaca in one of the videos above. Clip:
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Unrelated, but since I posted it in the Kevin thread, I might as well post it here. Kevin complaining about the animals being impatient and then shoving a goat:
mean.mp4
His voice/tone is so annoying, lol. Sounds like a whiny little kid.

Oh fuck that thing has horns. You can dehorn goats as kids, because they'll hurt themselves, others, and you. One method uses heat, another uses banding, like the kind for castration.

But that alpaca is prime height to be gored by those horns.

 

[Disheveled-Human]

This is why the mentally ill should not be allowed to have pets, this is no different then the crazy cat lady hoarder who has 30 cats and a percentage of them end up melted into the carpet under piles of garbage.

 

[Fornicario]

and it's buttsex

So Alpacawitz has been relocated. In the dark of Twitter. I'm wondering how many got rehomed, so I can calculate the size of the tranny raised wild rape herd. Pepe is going to be infamous if he's free to follow his panspecial penis. Cattle ranchers beware.

 

[Manul Otocolobus]

How long until the new owner of the former tranch land finds the mass Alpaca grave?

 

[Maverick Vile]

I'm wondering if those goats don't actually belong to Phil's mom. The concrete culvert with the chain ladder, and the upright post with the pvc loops hanging off it, both look like the sort of thing I've seen people build for their goats to play on. They look to have been there for quite a while.

If so, this would mean that the tranchers have brought their alpaca stock to an existing herd of goats and invaded it, just like troons invading womens' bathrooms.

It would also mean that the tranchers still haven't learned one damned thing about responsible animal husbandry*, and just decided on a whim "Oh, the goats will get along fine with the 'pacas. Give 'em a day or so and they'll be like sisters!"

*No, I'm not autistic nor optimistic enough to believe that they ever will learn one damned thing. About anything.

Is anyone surprised, though? These people don't understand basic biology, why would they do their homework on animal husbandry?

 

[Ophelia]

Is it possible for the parents to kick everyone out? (Sorry am new)

 

[Fred Herbert]

I am glad this nightmarish Alpaca Auschwitz is coming to an end. Sadly I doubt any of these "people" will face any type of charge for their years of horrific animal abuse.

 

[Fornicario]

How long until the new owner of the former tranch land finds the mass Alpaca grave?

With Google on their side, I'm willing to bet foreclosure is now in Boner's worst interest. With Penis and the House of Horrors now rehomed, only Boner is left in the dock. Plus his successful eviction of them defeats any claim Boner had to adverse possession by Penis. God, this scenario was nowhere near my expectations. This is truly awesome. May this year keep giving.

 

[AprilRains]

Is anyone surprised, though? These people don't understand basic biology, why would they do their homework on animal husbandry?

The only animal husbandry these people do is when they get caught at it.

 

[Fornicario]

Is it possible for the parents to kick everyone out? (Sorry am new)

Thirty days from notice.

 

[NotFatChild]

I hope Paul exhumes the mass alpaca graves and posts about it for the world to see.

All he has to do and lie and say he didn't know about it. Cmon Paul, be the hero Kiwifarms needs for season 2. You can have your own protagonist arc.

 

[变性黑鬼]

Live pic from the tranchodus.

I hope they make it across the alps... I feel terrible for those poor, majestic beings.

 

[The Real Slim Shady]

How long until the new owner of the former tranch land finds the mass Alpaca grave?

Given that they did not bury them deeper than few feet, probably when the new owner tries to build something on the land, or even demolish that shitbox of a house.

I hope Paul exhumes the mass alpaca graves and posts about it for the world to see.

All he has to do and lie and say he didn't know about it. Cmon Paul, be the hero Kiwifarms needs for season 2. You can have your own protagonist arc.

Some of the twitter troons could actually buy the story that Paul was never the baddie and that they did all of it without his knowledge.

 

[Hitman One]

Have they said where the rest of the fucking animals are?

Gone to live with ol' Yeller on the Tranch in the sky.

 

[Neil]

And they're still being idiots, too. I count ~3 goats and 8-10 alpacas in these videos. That's still too many for a 5-acre plot! If they were going to keep any alpacas at all, they should've only kept 2-3. At least I don't see any sheep, thankfully. No Pepe the Vicuna either.

They had around 90-100+ alpacas, right? Holy fuck, that's an 8-10% alpaca survival rate, 11%~ at best if you lowball. This is some gristly shit.

 

[White-Kettle Shufflepunk]

When mom and dad die I hope they leave everything to the church. ANY church. Fuck these troon farm larping leeches.

Nation of Islam. Then if Penny complains he’ll get cancelled.

This sitcom was a hoot, but them killing off like 100 cuddly, cute, innocent Alpaca through their troonish incompetence sours it for me.

F for the wooly bros who did nothing wrong.

It’s like the ending of Dinosaurs if Sinclair’s boss escaped in a spaceship.

 

[Hokuriku]

The Tranchers are still silent on social media.
Jen has resumed the Patreon updates; I assume he was just stressed or busy with the move previously. If - like me - you've ever been curious about what kind of content they put behind the Patreon paywall (but don't want to pay the Tranchers to find out), then feast your eyes:
View attachment 4514181
View attachment 4514182
In this update post, you can see the youtube links which lead to unlisted videos on the Tranch's youtube channel.
View attachment 4514186View attachment 4514194
When I checked them out, there were no views and no comments on either video, despite the videos being posted two days ago. This tells me that the Tranch's Patrons don't really care about the Tranch's content... they probably just donate as a vague show of support and otherwise don't pay any attention. I also wouldn't be surprised if many of the donations are just recurring payments that have been forgotten about. It would explain why the Tranch Patreon hasn't really taken a hit despite the drama with Paul.

Here are the videos:
Everyone waiting for food [Y_WrO1nJQS8].webm
Paca in the snow [rUwG0YtMIC4].webm
It's just Penny and another troon (Kevin?) feeding the animals, same as always... riveting content.

What's interesting though is that they've clearly RELOCATED TO PENNY'S PARENTS' HOUSE!
And they're still being idiots, too. I count ~3 goats and 8-10 alpacas in these videos. That's still too many for a 5-acre plot! If they were going to keep any alpacas at all, they should've only kept 2-3. At least I don't see any sheep, thankfully. No Pepe the Vicuna either.

Spoiler: Clues showing they're at Penny's parents' house

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The Trail of Fleece