What was the most lolcow moment in the history of war?

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daddylongschlong

kiwifarms.net
Joined
Jul 4, 2022
For me it has to either be the time some Palestinian terrorists were planning to commit a bomb attack in Israel with a time bomb but forgot to factor in that Israel observed daylight savings time while Palestine didn't so the only casualties in the attack ended up being the terrorist themselves from the bomb blowing up too early or the time a blind medieval king got his men to strap him down to his horse in the middle of a battle and send him straight into the fray where he died instantly.
 
Something Awful goon and schizo lolcow Kevin Dawes/Caro travels to Syria to fight in its civil war as a medic (the entirety of his medical experience coming from Youtube videos he watched), eventually is captured by the Assad Regime and presumed dead, only to cuck Elliot Higgins and Bellingcat by returning to the US alive four years later.
 
There was an islamic bomber who was going to commit a new year's eve attack...had a remote detonation via phone on the bomb on his back in case he pussied out so his handlers could make sure it happened.

He got a happy new year text from Orange (phone provider) and it blew him up early.
 
This.
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Butterschmalz said:
Generally speaking: that any of them are ultimately pointless. Where is the Mongol Empire? Or the Holy Roman Empire today?
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Most things important to people are only important at a certain point in time. That any of these empires managed to last as they did is a testament to why they did what they did. Burning all of it down to 'it's all pointless because of the eternal march of entropy" is nihilist nonsense that leads to people being lazy morons.
 
Personally, I think most lolcow fight was Battle of Bautzen that took place the same week as Hitler committed suicide, so German military capabilities were close to zero. 50,000 Hitler youth kids and Volkssturm grandpas with hip replacements beat 120,000 Soviet and Polish troops and achieved 1/20 K/D ratio. One of the fattest military Ls of all time.
 
Pitbull Victim said:
Something Awful goon and schizo lolcow Kevin Dawes/Caro travels to Syria to fight in its civil war as a medic (the entirety of his medical experience coming from Youtube videos he watched), eventually is captured by the Assad Regime and presumed dead, only to cuck Elliot Higgins and Bellingcat by returning to the US alive four years later.
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a small introduction guide to Caro, which goes into detail how much people tried to deter him through Something Awful. I feel it's important to note he was banned multiple times, and he still paid the coin entry to come back and detail his spergantics. The soldiers who did interact with him dubbed him a war tourist, deeming him of little to no help. He also was in the Libya civil war before he got caught up in the Syrian civil war and being imprisoned.
 
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The Germans constantly having to listen to Hitler's inane and often downright moronic military planning. He inherited some of the finest military minds and structures and constantly refused their advice. He also had a habit of dumping tons of resources into projects which would never go anywhere, people knew it wouldn't, and nobody could tell him no.

The Japanese during WWII could be amazingly retarded as well. The Army and Navy hating one another and refusing to cooperate, infantry tactics which hadn't evolved since 1930 until the tailend of the war, throwing troops at islands with literally no resources or tactical value. They could literally only fight natives armed with antiquated rifles or when they had a massive advantage in numbers.
 
A-Stump said:
The Germans constantly having to listen to Hitler's inane and often downright moronic military planning. He inherited some of the finest military minds and structures and constantly refused their advice. He also had a habit of dumping tons of resources into projects which would never go anywhere, people knew it wouldn't, and nobody could tell him no.

The Japanese during WWII could be amazingly retarded as well. The Army and Navy hating one another and refusing to cooperate, infantry tactics which hadn't evolved since 1930 until the tailend of the war, throwing troops at islands with literally no resources or tactical value. They could literally only fight natives armed with antiquated rifles or when they had a massive advantage in numbers.
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Wasn't the main reason there were kamikaze tactics was due to how badly the planes were designed?
 
Great Pest Control of Nanjing
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Yaoi Huntress Earth said:
Wasn't the main reason there were kamikaze tactics was due to how badly the planes were designed?
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They made planes specifically for use in kamikaze missions toward the end of the war but no. Kamikaze was considered a far better way of insuring damage to targets. They could also use their conventional weaponry and then crash.
 
I always remember that time in WW2 where the Soviets trained dogs to basically be tank busters by using backpacks full of explosives' on them. Unfortunately in the actual scenario against the Germans the dogs couldn't tell the difference between a soviet and a German tank. Needless to say those tank dogs busted an entire batallion while the Germans looked in confusion..
 
Probably the Austrian high staffs response to the July crisis ; "War, War, War!". It was literally an autistic sperg out
 
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