😵‍💫 Skitzocow Dana Marie Cain / Oracle of Venus / The Scorpion - Divorced Unlovable Batshit Space Demon Waitress with NPD, Gangstalked by Alphabet Agencies, "Pretending to be Rеtarded", #SaveJoelIrish, running from the long arm of the law

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So the wonderful and GODLY goddess has been having fun on FB spewing hate for Dems and Liberals. Stay classy, DD
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Bubonic_Vague said:
Yep, that's surely the face of someone who is still on the wagon.

Speaking of wagons, can't wait for the professional-psychic-in-a-grimy-tin-can arc - in what seems to be ground zero for psychics and other hooey hippies. And the competition have air conditioning.

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This is so great.

She is so going to alienate herself from her competition.

She will so fuck that up wonderfully.

Nothing like a self-proclaimed rape victim.

She probably asked GarbageMike to stick that wine bottle in her during one of her black-out drunk escapades.

Thats what filthy whores do and Dana is as dirty as they come.

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So she was asking 50, now she's asking 20, the ones all around I see are asking 5 bucks a reading for walk ins. This is not even in Sedona AZ where tarot and psychics are crawling around like fleas with their tie dyed campers. She has a nice Long term thing with her client who is paying for her dentures but she needs money for the teefers now and next month she'll be camping in the desert and needing monies to live as a tarot reader please halp!!!
ETA:
Bitch got her one month notice to gtfo. "Client"is done with her bs. Onto the next homeless crazy lady in the trailer.
 
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CrazyAsHell said:
@Toasty, wait. Did she get her walking papers?
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I'm just speculating based on what she said in that video. Her sudden need for computer and dental money when she said that the "client" was paying for the dentures and the streamers would be covering her platforms. But now she needs "donations" for her spangly bangles and hippie skirts to read some tarot card in a land where you are practically tobogganing down a ski slope of them into the grand canyon. The rental donkeys trip over a better reading than what DD can give you. With less shit than what is stuck to her cards. And more sober. She doesn't need $$ for dentures or a computer. She's desperate for money to try and buy the trailer.
 
Toasty said:
I'm just speculating based on what she said in that video. Her sudden need for computer and dental money when she said that the "client" was paying for the dentures and the streamers would be covering her platforms. But now she needs "donations" for her spangly bangles and hippie skirts to read some tarot card in a land where you are practically tobogganing down a ski slope of them into the grand canyon. The rental donkeys trip over a better reading than what DD can give you. With less shit than what is stuck to her cards. And more sober. She doesn't need $$ for dentures or a computer. She's desperate for money to try and buy the trailer.
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She reckons she's going to camp out there for 3 DAYS and make $1000! Excluding sleep and travel time, she'll need to do 2-3 readings AN HOUR, all day long. I don't think she's thought this through, lol.

Definitely the rank whiff of desperation, though. Jesse Client got jealous of her new Tard-getted Invidual online boyfriend?
 
Bubonic_Vague said:
She reckons she's going to camp out there for 3 DAYS and make $1000! Excluding sleep and travel time, she'll need to do 2-3 readings AN HOUR, all day long. I don't think she's thought this through, lol.

Definitely the rank whiff of desperation, though. Jesse Client got jealous of her new Tard-getted Invidual online boyfriend?
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Oh geez...this should end in a glorious rain of fire. Since Jesse is paying that phone bill, I would suggest she go find a REAL job. She can't read warrants much less tarot cards.

ETA: she mentions in the video she is an ordained minister with Universal Ministries and says it's her "religion". Except......they preach the bible....not tarot readings. https://www.universalministries.com/index.php

I do wonder what admin here "outed" CAH saying it's Tami Hess?
 
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Bubonic_Vague said:
She reckons she's going to camp out there for 3 DAYS and make $1000! Excluding sleep and travel time, she'll need to do 2-3 readings AN HOUR, all day long. I don't think she's thought this through, lol.

Definitely the rank whiff of desperation, though. Jesse Client got jealous of her new Tard-getted Invidual online boyfriend?
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Jesse the client has already made it clear that he is less than pleased about her live/work arrangement. She mentioned it in one of her livestreams. Of course she took no responsibility. It was all the wind's fault! Can't garden in the wind! It's not like she never made a videos showing how she made token efforts of drowning a few seeds into some cups of water and recorded some pictures of scrubland and old tires while she stumbled around drunk telling the world how she had this fantastic new client she was going to grow tomatoes for and who would protect her from EVERYTHING two months ago in the desert in return for letting her stay in a trailer on his property. No plants have been seen. No garden has grown. The only progress made is that some trolls have gotten Dana to make a spectacle of herself online. They ask for TI info and all she does is discuss her sex life. She's managed to lose her lower plate. The poor dog probably chewed it up since she can't be bothered to put it away when she passes out or buy the pooch some toys. The "client" / latest male benefactor since Dana can't function without a man doing it for her is seriously done. He has had enough and told her so. It remains to be seen how the "client" will become the latest mortal enemy in her narrative. Suddenly she is moving to camp in Sedona in a month. She did a reading for Chrystal and expects a big return from this. All the friends of Chrystal will pile in now and "donate" 20 dollars each for tarot readings from someone who changes who the reading is for between cards. As well as her price. Sometimes the cards are free, it's the zodiac that's 50$ "donation" (as if she can't just plug it in online). Now the cards are 20$ WOW WHAT A STEAL!!! Unfortunately the much better reader in the glittery yurt round the way is giving them for 10 and will also do your aura tea leaves and palm too. Possibly topless. And smell better. Probably like funk patchouli and lilacs but still better than DD.
Sorry you lot feeling loquacious. Shutting up now. Dana is a giant cuntrag
 
In which Dana awkwardly ducks out of a conversation whilst helicopters apparently stalk her to a magical rock. (5/10) The change of scenery is nice, at least it's short?
No description, no comments, 3 likes.
FPS-mode Dana.
Healing rock, you guiz!
Lulu is unsurprisingly quite jumpy what with Dana's constant schedule of locking her in a room so she can yell about Tami.
The Client tries talking about something, Dana is more concerned with dragging her dog around.
The Client also appears to be walking with snake tongs, which is a good idea considering.
Dana couldn't even find the right size harness for her dog.
Dana seemingly left all her water in the car because planning ahead is for suckers.
Something about an oo-gee-boo-gee?
The Client makes small talk with some passersby as Dana immediately clams up and films the mountains.
Dana wanders off just far enough to avoid awkwardness and attract the snakes.
Helicopters are heard in the background.
"The helicopters are keeping an eye on you." - The Client
"I guess so..." - Dana "3 Star Wanted Level" Marie
Fin.

In which Dana's stamina pales in comparison to someone apparently so infirm they need a live in caretaker. (5/10) Dana is still a terrible pet owner.
No description, apparently Shill was supposed to be there with Dana, 7 likes.
Dana's 30 solid years of chainsmoking haven't done wonders for her stamina.
How's this for a title drop?
Dana let Lulu wander off leash into the brush.
Dana confirms she forgot the water, luckily Dana's adventures aren't taking her too far from the parking lot.
Nothing can spoil Dana's disappointing daytrip.
Fin.

In which Dana outlines her business plan of squatting outside a tourist spot in a tent with a gypsy outfit and accosting randos for tarot card readings, yes, really. Also she needs her suddenly existing supporters to pay for her teeth and a new laptop. Dana plans to undercut the existing market rate for tarot cards by 66%, despite being a good enough psychic that the FBI should hire her. (6/10) Another incoming tent saga, this time with several snakes costarring potentially!
No description, Sockness and Shill both simping in the comments, 20 likes.
Desert hag mode engaged.
Shoutout to Krystal Roberts and Burger Boy for being Dana's 2 viewers on her last stream!
The cards help Dana cold read, no idea if the scam has made any money yet though.
Dana's turnaround tour is still ongoing, you guiz!
Dana accidentally calls Bell Rock "Indecision Rock".
Dana never had an issue with "harmless trolling", you guiz!
"I actually gave birth to trolls..." - Dana "The Gorgon" Marie
Burger Boy did a thing and is one of the good trolls, or something.
"Some people really do need to be trolled..." - Dana "GangStalker" Marie
God's plan for people arbitrarily weirder than Dana is to have them made fun of on the internet.
TI sperging isn't trolling, despite Dana's conflating of the two for years.
Thanks to the KF admins for the handling the alleged Tami's vendetta.
Josh totally confirmed Dana's suspicions, which suspicions? Fuck you.
Dana raises her totally not Irish coffee in support.
"So I've decided to become a professional, tarot reader." - Dana "Miss Cleo" Marie
Once again Dana's terrible ideas are stymied by a lack of gullible men to pay for them.
Dana plans to camp out at Indecision Rock and just kind of do drive-by tarot readings or something.
(Desert Whorebag saga when?)
"Imagine what I can do there, imagine the power..." - Dana "20 Bucks For 20 Minutes" Marie
Dana is a member of Universal Ministries. (Because much like national dean's list, there isn't a single scam Dana didn't fall for in the 90s, it currently costs $35 to call yourself a minister.)
(I don't know why Dana brought up UM? Is she hoping to make more money officiating weddings from her schizo tent?)
"It's gonna be pretty amazing..." - Dana, regarding her business plan of asking people for $20 from her tent
MLM Dana needs gullible people to have gullible friends.
Most tarot readers apparently charge $60. (So why is the supposed world's greatest psychic trying to undercut the market?)
Dana lost her laptop when moving from NY and The Client's internet sucks.
Dana's dental situation is still fucked to the tune of $600.
Another $400-500 for another laptop. (Ostensibly for streaming, but we all know Dana's alky brain needs to google what tarot cards mean.)
"So, I'm guessing I could raise $1,000 pretty easily..." - Dana "Sedona Slutbag" Marie
The Client is apparently willing to let Dana just haul his trailer off to Sedona.
"Honestly, why the hell wouldn't I do that?" (Because Sedona already has a well established supply of tarot schizos and camping just to harass tourists is a great way to end up antagonizing the cops again?)
"I'm really really good, like, The FBI should hire me to solve crimes." - Dana "Dana-ly Premonitions" Marie
Dana "Ringo" Marie just needs a little support (Over $1000 in money to blow) from her internet friends.
The Client is stiffing Dana. Oh, and also he isn't paying her very much.
"I guess psychic isn't a real job, but it does pay well." - Dana "Full-Time Lunatic" Marie
"The troll community has welcomed me..." - Dana, likely hoping to make some money off of the bridge tolls
Dana strawmans someone who flashed their ass?
"I'm not that weird..." - Dana "Tuning the Tuna" Marie
Dana acknowledges the lewdstreams as a way to protect her from MurderMike.
More about Mike's unsatisfactory wine bottle...
Dana fails to come up with an excuse.
Dana got drunk and fingered herself to prevent Mike from murdering her.
"It was because I was trying not to die."
The only place you can be safe in NY is at a casino hotel.
Everything is Tami's fault!
Next month will be the revival of Dana's tent of fun!
"I'm gonna even look the part, I'm gonna get like the fuckin' Gypsy skirt and shit..." - Dana "Balls, Crystals and Crystal Balls" Marie
If you have an important decision to make, why not give Dana $20 to fuck it up?
Dana is totally a great conduit, you guiz! (Coincidentally she's also laid more pipe than your average plumber...)
Spread the word!
Payment is now mandatory.
Dana doesn't want to be involved with yet another theoretical serial killer...
Ask Dana for career and relationship advice! (Nice way to play to your inherent strengths there, Dumpster!)
Dana is totaly legit because of her past readings, like when she failed to cleanse Mike's murder demons.
Shill and Dana are still totally planning their show. (Kind of telling regarding his commercial success that he isn't willing to buy Dana a laptop.)
"My... skills as a psychic, will play into that." (Unfortunately not your cooking skills, then it might accidentally end up watchable.)
Just hauling ass to Sedona seems like a good plan, you guiz!
fin.

In which Dana angrily does dishes whilst talking about how much she's winning because the thread is full of literal witches. Also alcoholism is magical I guess when people of certain races are alcoholics. (3/10) I think you missed a spot, Dana...
No description, Will wants Dana to do his dishes, 4 likes.
Dana is wearing her goofy key to Danaland necklace again.
Washing some dishes!
Let's talk about alcohol!
Dana's alcoholism doesn't exist because arbitrarily her haters have worse problems.
"Let me explain something to you about drinking and being a psychic..." - Dana "The JD Foresees" Marie
Alcohol has been used in spiritual rituals, you guiz! (Are there any that take place in a moving vehicle?)
Cousin Jesus did the water into wine thing.
"I come from a very long, line, of psychic mediums..." - Dana "Lucky Charms" Marie
Dana isn't a real witch, you guiz!
KF is full of witches because apparently all fuggos are magical?
"It's not hard to tell!" (Not when you have a persecution complex the size of the lower 48 and take everything literally...)
The haters are using black magic against Dana!
All psychic mediums are alcoholics because of Dana's Celtic heritage?
"And, there are people out there that understand the use of alcohol..." - Dana "Wizard of AA" Marie
Pity party.
"It was beyond horrible..." - Dana, showing some of that psychic power by reviewing her show ahead of time
Being dependent on alcohol is a good thing, you guiz!
"If you're a combat vet, law-enforcement, you know..." - Dana "PTSD and JD" Marie
Dana has it much worse than first responders because they only had to deal with the after effects of her antics!
Uncle God gives Dana's alcoholism a wide berth.
"I've been under terrible psychic attack..." - Dana "Imaginary Enemies" Marie
Be glad you don't know how fucked up Dana's mind really is.
Coof sperging, another part in Dana's series fairly minor apocalypses.
We're all living in Danaland now...
Dana critiques mainstream media.
"Youtube has made it so anybody can be a star!" - Dana "149 Subs" Marie
Fame is about being interesting, it's no wonder why Dana failed...
Dana "Independent Woman" Marie is happy she has internet friends.
(Dana, this sure isn't going to raise that $1,000 you need.)
"That thread? Was an exercise in witchcraft."
The Grim Reaper and Hecate are actually Dana's friends, shithags!
Dana can't even be bothered to watch her fellow schizos' streams.
Totally targeted, you guiz!
It's completely obvious that everyone on Dana's thread is a witch.
The Bible says the KF witches should be killed?
"I don't go around, doing black magic on people." - Dana "That Old Wench Magic" Marie
Glowie apparently outsources their evil plots to internet witches.
Not just someone who practices Earth magic, you guiz!
(Ask Sockness to show you his books sometime there, Dana.)
Demons just look like older women. (About that...)
Dana still can't pronounce Hecate.
It's a sin to use black magic on specifically Dana.
"You have no clue, ladies, what's coming to you..." - Dana, who also has no clue if her constant "something"s are any indication
"Your denials mean dick to me..." - Dana "Polish Sausage" Marie
Now that the dishes are done Dana is free to use her inane hand gestures.
If you die in the Danaverse, you die in real life, or something...
Fin.
 
Dana I only come to this thread to let you know this thing I learned. With everything happening in 2022 you just don‘t warrant real attention anymore. You will do your thing, sperg about gayops and how they tried to destroy you. Yell about how horrible of a life Skip and Steph have even as you have to suck old cock while on the run. Rage at your ungrateful sons even as they wish they had a mother just sane enough to help. But it means nothing. You are nothing. You will never be anything because you chose to indulge fake fantasies over actually getting better. You will die alone and forgotten even by us at the Farms. If you have any power send me a revelation and I swear to extol your magnificent power. I won’t wait with bated breath though. Cope and seethe bitch, your gods are fake and your abilities are lies. You are just a privileged bitch who went off her meds to crazy town
 
She is live now talking about being gang stalked. Within the TI community, most are just having delusions except, of course, her. I listened for like 2 minutes and that was enough. Did manage a couple of screenshots; looks like her vid of last night talking about how her drinking is totally OK was a set up for her to start drinking again. I doubt this is the first time she has drank since her quitting announcement. The other screenshot is some cringeworthy shit from the giant man-child.
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CrazyAsHell said:
I do wonder what admin here "outed" CAH saying it's Tami Hess?
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It's because you said a while back you have no idea why you were named "Tami Hess" in your signature or bio or whatever that thing is called under our usernames, and you suggested perhaps a mod had done it - I'm too lazy to search for the quote, soz. It's KF, who the fuck knows.

ETA: found it: https://kiwifarms.net/threads/dana-marie-cain-oracle-of-venus-the-scorpion.39154/post-11791785

Of course, the crazies have taken this to mean that the mods of KF - even Jersh Himself! - are HELPING DurrNerr by outing CAH as the real Tami Hess. They think KF is heeding Dumpster's threats to nuke the Farms, and outed Tami to placate the cow. Because misreading shit to support their crazy is what crazies do.

I for one couldn't care less if you're RealTami (tm)or not - good on yer either way for contributing to this hilariously entertaining thread.
 
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