🗑️ Trashfire Ethan Ralph vs. Mister Metokur & Gator - It's finally happening

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Who did the worse beating?

  • The 14-year-old transgender prostitute in Lisbon.

    Votes: 599 24.7%

  • A Minnesota cancer patient.

    Votes: 1,304 53.9%

  • Mundane "Boulder King" Matt Jarbo.

    Votes: 518 21.4%
  • Total voters
    2,421
Also for bonus lulz, Ralph's up at 3am in Portugal, alone, in pain, stuck in a hospital, and absolutely seething.
 
beautiful person said:
Metokur turning on Ralph on the very last day of January is the perfect bookend to a very kino month.
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So ends the first month in the year of the CHUD, Its going to be a wild ride.

chud.png
 
This can only end well. Ralph's remaining friends are going to pull away even more over this, and he'll respond by calling them all snakes and fairweather friends, which will just cause more butthurt and more tantrums from the gunt. I think we may finally be reaching the endgame here, but holy fuck has it ever been a ride.

To think people wanted this man to serve serious jailtime.
 
Wazzupnerds said:
While I think Jim is late to party, this is gonna be fun.

Also, congrats Gator on finding your balls.
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The partys hitting the final big round just before the end. Jim came at the right time imo, the hospital arc was ending. But now the metokur arc begins.
 
Michael Janke said:
nah, they'll deport his ass free of charge 1st class if they have to to get rid of him.
if he stays in portugal any longer, he's liable to end up killed going by his track record.
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lol he’s already threatening people on twitter again. guaranteed he’ll end up doing something stupid while getting shitfaced drunk. there’s no way he’s not drinking rn from the stress of daddy gym dropping his ass. shit is getting heated up bros... it’s still january here
 
So, can we look forward to a full 24 hour shit stream once he gets back from Portugal where he and May call everyone around them losers while popping pills?
 
Sam Losco said:
According to dox hunters in his thread, he changed his name from James Patrick O'Shaughnessy (no, really) to James Augustine. Jade's legal name was Jem (no, really) and she changed hers to Sophia Augustine, IIRC.

Still better than having 3 first names as your name, Ethan Oliver Ralph.
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Oh, OK (I thought that was a faildox or an alias). "James Augustine" has been known for what, 3 years? This is Ralph's bombshell? Yes, clearly Jim should've laid everything bare about his life and eaten Jade's shit on camera like a real Ralphamale.
 
The worst thing about Ralph is he immediately goes after people's loved ones whenever he has beef. He's the worst kind of scumbag that's why not a single person felt sympathy for him when he was beaten half to death over his man purse.
 
Guntsbury Hill Parody of Solosbury Hill by
Peter Gabriel
Written by Cal Rollia

(Verse 1)
Thrown my broom at guntsbury hill
I can see the brighter times
Don't have to be a shill
Gunt Hollerin at the night
He was something to disavow
Came in close, I heard a voice
He weeps what he sowed
Had to listen had no choice

(Chorus 1)
I'm tired of being a gunt guard My career is best at the sweetie squad
Threw my broom it said plop plop plop plop
"Andy," she said "you've been a father more than Ethan Ralph"

(Verse 2)
People told me to break free I told them
"maybe im a little retarded"
Wouldn't it be funny to see him seethe
He couldn't admit that he sharted
So I went from day to day
The less I keep my mouth shut
Defending Ralph just became gay
It was easy for which connection I should cut

(Chorus)
I'm tired of being part of the kill stream
I want to watch another pillstream
Threw my broom it said plop plop plop plop
"Andy," she said "you've been a father more
than Ethan Ralph"

(Verse 3)
When the pill bottles start to me
Lying about how you got beat
It was 4 guys you pirouette
The house always wins I tweet
Ralph spite travel being belligerent
Thrown my broom and chains now im free
No one taught him etiquette
There's a Puerto Rican Blonde for me

(Chorus)
Today I won't lick up any more gunt crease
I'm going to see my ratings increase
Threw my broom it said plop plop plop plop
"Shanny" jim said "how you like to be my cohost"

 
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God, I'm so tired of all the Ralph drama lately....because I've been ODing on all the Kino with all the stupid shit that's happened in the last month!

LET'S FUCKING GUNT!
 
Do you guys think after Ralph's gone, faith and maighhhhh will tell their little bastards the tale of the Gunt?
 
good shit @WhimsicalTrolli but have you heard my latest rap?

here it is:
1643687068624.png

FEAR
What must it be like to live in abject fear?

Not the everyday variety. Life is hard, and we’re all scared, to some degree. Sickness, death, birth, life…the mysteries of existence. These things have torn at the psyche of great (and lesser) men since time began.

Fear itself is not new.

What I’m talking about is a different kind of fear. One that keeps you from leaving your house. One that causes you to change the name you were born with. One that pushes you into deluding your fellow citizens into the nightmare COVID regime.

All because, at your core, you are a scared, old man who’s simply afraid to die.

You’ve never had any real convictions your whole life. You’re proud of that, even! Or, so you say. In reality, you are a scared child praying, hoping, wishing that you could escape your just rewards. You’ll do anything, suck off any one, to avoid it. You simply can’t live as you have portrayed yourself. It’s too much! You cry about it in Twitter dm’s, you whine to your fat Asian hog….but deep down, you know this is what you signed up for.

And you can’t fucking stand it.

You entire life is a fabrication. You duck and dive and do whatever you possibly can to avoid the piper getting paid. You put your own family at risk. You do anything, anything at all, to avoid simply owning up to your deeds. You have no core whatsoever, and what you do claim as personality traits are simply things you read on a message board.

Most people would see this as a hellish existence…because it is.

There are mistakes I have made, to be sure. But I could never, and would never, live like a fucking bitch. Scared to leave my house…scared of the name my Daddy gave me…scared of fucking COVID…scared of anything and everything.

It’s all terror to you when the microphone is off.

We all know it, too. It’s very easy to see a scared old man, coughing up one of his last breaths in between lame monologues that weren’t even funny 2 years ago, much less now.

I literally would have rather died in the street the other day here in Lisbon than live like a fucking coward, if you can even call what I described above as “living.”

Some people are fine with the delusions. They are comforted by them, even. I understand! I, too, used to love the thought of Santa Claus, or the Easter Bunny, or the Tooth Fairy. But there comes a time when childish delusions about a childless loser must come to an end.

It’s the natural course of life, you see.

Well, if you actually live life. If you live like scared, old, bitch…well, maybe you continue on in your delusions.

I won’t hold it against you!

The Emperor has no clothes, he has no children, and he has very few white blood cells left (allegedly).

Maybe, in another life, he wasn’t such a pussy.

See you tomorrow night on the Killstream!

archive.is

Fear

archived 1 Feb 2022 03:26:13 UTC
archive.is archive.is
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