🐱 Trump's Coke boycott? Over in three days

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Online sleuths closely analyzed a photo of former President Donald Trump on Monday that had been posted on social media by his White House adviser Stephen Miller. And they did so with the intensity of cable crime show characters who scream, "Enhance, enhance!" as they zoom in on an image of a suspect's license plate. Ultimately, they found what they were looking for: the trademark contoured shape of a Coke bottle, decorated with a flash of red, peeking out from behind the telephone in the Trump's Mar-a-Lago office.

Trump released a statement only days prior urging conservatives to boycott Coca-Cola and other major companies — including Delta Airlines, Major League Baseball (MLB), UPS and ViacomCBS — whose leaders had spoken out against Georgia's restrictive voting law. Among other things, the legislation makes it a crime to bring food and water to voters who are waiting to cast their ballots.


"It is finally time for Republicans and Conservatives to fight back—we have more people than they do—by far!" said the statement, which was distributed by Trump's former legal advisor Jenna Ellis on Twitter. "Don't go back to their products until they relent. We can play the game better than them."

It apparently took less than 72 hours (if that) for Trump to relent, or as the saying goes, old habits die hard. As Salon reported in January, one of President Joe Biden's first actions in office was removing Trump's "Diet Coke button," which the former president used to request cold sodas on-demand.


"Throughout Trump's presidency, his obsessive love of the beverage was well-documented," Salon wrote. "In 2017, the Washington Post published that he reportedly drank a dozen cans of Diet Coke per day and, while the majority of Americans are just finding out about the Diet Coke button, that same year, Demetri Sevastopulo wrote for The Financial Timesabout how he noticed the red button on Trump's desk. He jokingly asked if it was the nuclear button, to which Trump replied, 'No, no, everyone thinks it is. Everyone does get a little nervous when I press that button.'"

Trump would call out for them during tense conversations (like discussing purchasing the rights to a story about an alleged affair he had with ex-Playboy model Karen Mcdougall) and seemed to relish the feeling of being able to summon a servant with a cold drink at the push of a button while consistently bolstering his stump speeches with assertions of being a man of the people. It's not surprising that his hypocrisy extends to his soda consumptionhabits.

Other conservatives, however, seem to be holding the line more tightly. After the MLB announced that it was moving its All-Star Game out of Atlanta, Gov. Brian Kemp, R-Ga., decried the decision as "cancel culture" during a press conference.

"We shouldn't apologize for making it easier to vote and hard to cheat," he said.


Meanwhile, Sen. Minority Leader Mitch McConnell, R-Ky., characterized the situation as corporations allowing themselves to be bullied while "join[ing] in the bullying themselves."

"From election law to environmentalism to radical social agendas to the Second Amendment, parts of the private sector keep dabbling in behaving like a woke parallel government," he said in a statement.

Unlike Trump, neither Kemp nor McConnell have been spotted appearing to stash a secret soda in their office — at least not yet.
 
Or, crazy thought, maybe it was soda he'd already bought. It was only three days after his statement.

Like, I didn't buy more Gillette shaving supplies after the masculinity bad commercial. Doesn't mean I threw out the ones I already gave Proctor and Gamble money for. That would be retarded.

Not saying he's incapable of boycott hypocrisy, but he probably already owned that bottle of coke beforehand.
 
President Trump probably has a stash of Diet Coke around, like the alkie and his spare bottles. However, that stash won't last forever. He'll have to re-up on his supply at some point. And I just realized, that I don't care what the old man drinks.
 
He's been out of office for almost two months now. Still writing petty bullshit about him for clicks.

I'd laugh like hell if he pulls a Houdini and disappears for a few months with no public appearances or statements just to further tank their shitty rags for lack of topics to write about.
 
Article is likely from the same people who boycott JK Rowling but still buy every Harry Potter crap.


Or, crazy thought, maybe it was soda he'd already bought. It was only three days after his statement.

I really do believe that the ideas of planning, prepping and bulk buying is a foreign thought to them. They buy their food stuff day to day.
 
Or, crazy thought, maybe it was soda he'd already bought. It was only three days after his statement.

Like, I didn't buy more Gillette shaving supplies after the masculinity bad commercial. Doesn't mean I threw out the ones I already gave Proctor and Gamble money for. That would be retarded.

Not saying he's incapable of boycott hypocrisy, but he probably already owned that bottle of coke beforehand.
You aren't a highly scrutinised a billionaire former president. If I had multiple billions of dollars and went on a crusade against a fucking soda company I would make sure to not be photographed three fucking days later with their stupid disgusting drink.
 
He's been out of office for almost two months now. Still writing petty bullshit about him for clicks.

I'd laugh like hell if he pulls a Houdini and disappears for a few months with no public appearances or statements just to further tank their shitty rags for lack of topics to write about.
I dont think he's capable of that
 
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There is nothing they can do to Whites that will make them fight back.
 
You aren't a highly scrutinised a billionaire former president. If I had multiple billions of dollars and went on a crusade against a fucking soda company I would make sure to not be photographed three fucking days later with their stupid disgusting drink.
Counterpoint: Trump is delightfully autistic about his diet coke. Like allegedly requiring a seven-step pour when served autistic. Also, installing a literal fucking diet coke button in the White House. Oh, and bringing some along to have poured for him while foreign dignitaries and rich elite sip wine or champagne. Many such cases.

I am honestly convinced the man loves diet coke more than his wife and possibly even his kids. He probably hired some of the mafia goons he put out of business back in the day to steal the recipe for him in the greatest heist the world will never hear about, and put one of the copies he doesn't fap to into a hermetically sealed nuclear bunker to ensure that diet coke will outlast us all.
 
Counterpoint: Trump is delightfully autistic about his diet coke. Like allegedly requiring a seven-step pour when served autistic. Also, installing a literal fucking diet coke button in the White House. Oh, and bringing some along to have poured for him while foreign dignitaries and rich elite sip wine or champagne. Many such cases.

I am honestly convinced the man loves diet coke more than his wife and possibly even his kids. He probably hired some of the mafia goons he put out of business back in the day to steal the recipe for him in the greatest heist the world will never hear about, and put one of the copies he doesn't fap to into a hermetically sealed nuclear bunker to ensure that diet coke will outlast us all.
This post isn't deserving of a puzzle piece. It's the entire fucking puzzle.
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Counterpoint: Trump is delightfully autistic about his diet coke. Like allegedly requiring a seven-step pour when served autistic. Also, installing a literal fucking diet coke button in the White House. Oh, and bringing some along to have poured for him while foreign dignitaries and rich elite sip wine or champagne. Many such cases.

I am honestly convinced the man loves diet coke more than his wife and possibly even his kids. He probably hired some of the mafia goons he put out of business back in the day to steal the recipe for him in the greatest heist the world will never hear about, and put one of the copies he doesn't fap to into a hermetically sealed nuclear bunker to ensure that diet coke will outlast us all.
Wasn't there a story about why he only drinks Diet Coke and eats fast food? Maybe I'm wrong but I remember something about how he got poisoned once and since then he orders McDonalds or another brand in a way that it can't be traced to him.
 
A more honest (read: insane) article, straight out of Always Sunny:

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