Tabletop Roleplaying Games (D&D, Pathfinder, CoC, ETC.)

[Snekposter]

So, I heard you guys like Kender...

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Took them long enough to add the "quirky" race to 5e.

I can't fucking believe it. They somehow made Kender worse.

 

[Fictional Character]

You just hate me because I'm kenderqueer.

 

[Mr. Manchester]

How the fuck does stuff just magically appear in your pocket? The one thing you could do that would be fun with a Kender is just tell your friends "he steals shit all the time, this power represents that so I don't steal shit from you or derail the game" and they fucked it up. But wait, what's this?

Now I am able to play a tiny black man that screams insults and steals shit all the time. Thank you Hasbro. Thank you.

 

[WinchesterPremium]

How the fuck does stuff just magically appear in your pocket? The one thing you could do that would be fun with a Kender is just tell your friends "he steals shit all the time, this power represents that so I don't steal shit from you or derail the game" and they fucked it up. But wait, what's this?

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Now I am able to play a tiny black man that screams insults and steals shit all the time. Thank you Hasbro. Thank you.

They don't steal anymore. Now they just have counterfeit counterfeit money that vanishes after 1 hour.

 

[Jet Fuel Johnny]

I think you guys may be over-reacting a tad to this Kender bullshit. If you are a part of a group of people you know and trust, this should be fine. If people start showing up in online games with these Kender, and get in, then you know to avoid that game like the plague.

I've played with a Kender player in a Dragon Lance setting, and he was actually really cool. Then again, the dude was in his fifties and had been playing since AD&D. He was a Druid, and me and him had fun fucking with people. He'd turn into a bear, and then my Warlock would make him invisible. At one point, we were facing down this crazy witch we'd been tracking, and mid-way during her opening villian monologue a fucking grizzly seemed to appear out of thin air beside her, and bit her arm off. Good times....

With the right person, any class and race can be fun. That said, I wouldn't trust any of the CR crowd with that kind of race. So much about good roleplaying groups revolve around trust and communication. Maybe during a second campaign? I can accept PVP in my games if it makes sense, and all the drama at the table stays strictly at the table.

This post was written by a fucking Kender and I demand Null come in here and fucking gas this freak with Zyklon-B.

 

[Ghostse]

I've played with a Kender

Leave.

They don't steal anymore. Now they just have counterfeit counterfeit money that vanishes after 1 hour.

While I hate Kender (and gnomes) on principal, the whole "things magically show up in my pockets" is an excuse to basically just autocast the 5e spell where you magic up an item, only its random. At presented in those playtest documents, Kender are still wackyrandom creepy loli/shota bait but no where near as shit as some of the Kender implementations.
Granted thats partly because they only put out two paragraphs and that's not a lot of room to hang ones self

 

[ZMOT]

Are they seriously making a race about taking stuff from other players again? Really what's up with designers and pushing shit that tries to fuck with party cohesion? I've thankfully never played with Kender (that shit was way before my time lmao) however the idea and horror stories behind them would make me wary of anybody looking to play a Kender or include Kender in anyway.

that's why they make perfect villains. shit goes missing? it's was the kender! shit goes sideways? it was the kender's fault!

then you top it off with the BBEG being a disillusioned, nihilistic emo kender who just wants to watch the world burn. imagine those sneaky gits not being goodnatured and wellmeaning under all that kleptomania, instead of masterfully taking stuff from you they masterfully put stuff in you, mostly of the knife and poison variety.
no one would expect that!

 

[Ghostse]

that's why they make perfect villains. shit goes missing? it's was the kender! shit goes sideways? it was the kender's fault!

then you top it of with the BBEG being a disillusioned, nihilistic emo kender who just wants to watch the world burn. imagine those sneaky gits not being goodnatured and wellmeaning under all that kleptomania, instead of masterfully taking stuff from you they masterfully put stuff in you, mostly of the knife and poison variety.
no one would expect that!

Underdark Kinder - instead of stealing they leave things. Things that explode, poison, and curse.

 

[EnemyStand]

Underdark Kinder - instead of stealing they leave things. Things that explode, poison, and curse.

I see no difference from regular Kender. Played with one one time and the DM got so tired of the player's "wacky antics" he trapped the character in an Eternity Prison (BUT I WAS JUST PLAYING MY CHARACTER WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE'S CONSEQUENCES TO GRABBING RANDOM SHIT ON RANDOM PEDESTALS IN CURSED RUINS?!) and banned Kender as anything but a monster race.

Those sneaky little bastards are a great monster race...

 

[Snekposter]

I see no difference from regular Kender. Played with one one time and the DM got so tired of the player's "wacky antics" he trapped the character in an Eternity Prison (BUT I WAS JUST PLAYING MY CHARACTER WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE'S CONSEQUENCES TO GRABBING RANDOM SHIT ON RANDOM PEDESTALS IN CURSED RUINS?!) and banned Kender as anything but a monster race.

Those sneaky little bastards are a great monster race...

Almost like Hobbits. How does some random nobody from the Shire wind up with a wraith-slaying dagger and his best friend a direct servant of the King of the Reunited Kingdom, hmm?

 

[Corn Flakes]

Almost like Hobbits. How does some random nobody from the Shire wind up with a wraith-slaying dagger and his best friend a direct servant of the King of the Reunited Kingdom, hmm?

At least the Hobbit's travel companions will have someone who can cook well. If they're nice the Hobbit might even share some of his stash of pipeweed. Tolkien's Hobbits are bucolic and peaceful, not suicidally brave kleptos.

 

[EnemyStand]

Almost like Hobbits. How does some random nobody from the Shire wind up with a wraith-slaying dagger and his best friend a direct servant of the King of the Reunited Kingdom, hmm?

Literal angelic protection from a divine mandate, duh.

 

[Jet Fuel Johnny]

that's why they make perfect villains. shit goes missing? it's was the kender! shit goes sideways? it was the kender's fault!

then you top it of with the BBEG being a disillusioned, nihilistic emo kender who just wants to watch the world burn. imagine those sneaky gits not being goodnatured and wellmeaning under all that kleptomania, instead of masterfully taking stuff from you they masterfully put stuff in you, mostly of the knife and poison variety.
no one would expect that!

2E sees you and raises:

http://www.mojobob.com/roleplay/monstrousmanual/v/vampkend.html

From the dark land of Sithicus comes word of a breed of vampire only recently released on the demiplane of Ravenloft: the kender vampire. While not truly the equal of the other species of vampire, these monsters are no less evil.

Kender vampires retain the same general physical properties that they did in life. Thus, they stand somewhat under four feet in height and are very slightly built. Their eyes and ears give them an impish, elven look, and their slender bodies are finely muscled, like those of gymnasts. Upon closer examination, however, the foul corruption of the undead is obvious. The skin is pale and withered, stretched tight across the bones in a manner similar to that found on mummified corpses. The teeth are long and sharp, giving the face a feral look that cannot be easily forgotten. The fingers have been reduced to little more than bones with a thin covering of flesh, and their nails have stretched into claws.

Kender vampire are able to speak only in hissing whispers. Since it is clearly quite painful for them to talk, however, they seldom do so. Their knowledge of languages seems unchanged from what it was in life, however, so they often understand a small number of other tongues.

 

[WinchesterPremium]

Almost like Hobbits. How does some random nobody from the Shire wind up with a wraith-slaying dagger and his best friend a direct servant of the King of the Reunited Kingdom, hmm?

They ARE Hobbits. A brief history of Kinder:

Halflings are literally just royalty free Hobbits in the earlier editions. In 1E they could only be Thieves because they are all Bilbo.

When translating this to Dragonlance, they decided that they needed an explanation for why all Hobbits are thieves...and why they are also mostly good guys. So how do you create an entire race of thieves without making them bad guys default? Kender where their answer.

It wasn't a particularly good answer.

 

[Snekposter]

At least the Hobbit's travel companions will have someone who can cook well. If they're nice the Hobbit might even share some of his stash of pipeweed. Tolkien's Hobbits are bucolic and peaceful, not suicidally brave kleptos.

Bruh, they raided an ancient tomb, stole ancient knives, and then proceeded to pick a fight with a nigh-immortal undead being, and I will be completely unironic here, who is quite literally powerful beyond their comprehension. And they won.

Not to mention Bilbo just randomly grabbing shit at random he thought looked nice, like a golden ring that has no business being at the bottom of a cave.

They ARE Hobbits. A brief history of Kinder:

Halflings are literally just royalty free Hobbits in the earlier editions. In 1E they could only be Thieves because they are all Bilbo.

When translating this to Dragonlance, they decided that they needed an explanation for why all Hobbits are thieves...and why they are also mostly good guys. So how do you create an entire race of thieves without making them bad guys default? Kender where their answer.

It wasn't a particularly good answer.

I mean, that was my point, just explained and therefore unfunny now. Congrats.

 

[ZMOT]

At least the Hobbit's travel companions will have someone who can be cooked well.

fixed

If they're nice the Hobbit might even share some of his stash of pipeweed. Tolkien's Hobbits are bucolic and peaceful, not suicidally brave kleptos.

*laughs in gollum*

 

[Corn Flakes]

Bruh, they raided an ancient tomb, stole ancient knives, and then proceeded to pick a fight with a nigh-immortal undead being, and I will be completely unironic here, who is quite literally powerful beyond their comprehension. And they won.

Not to mention Bilbo just randomly grabbing shit at random he thought looked nice, like a golden ring that has no business being at the bottom of a cave.

See, that analogy would fly if Frodo had gotten caught pickpocketing Elrond's wallet. Ring of Power-induced plot contrivance isn't kleptomania.

*laughs in gollum*

I blame Precious.

 

[Wormy]

Kender Lives Don't Matter

Also, if I was Gandalf Stormcrow, I'd have just harrumphed and inscribed the dwarven rune for "Blackout Kegger Tonight!" on that little hairy freak's door before moving on to hire actual professional mercenaries...

 

[thx1138]

In 1E they could only be Thieves because they are all Bilbo.

Nope; they can advance up to as high as 6th level fighters, or multi-class as fighter/thief. If you're using Unearted Arcana they can be clerics or druids, too (as well as Thief/acrobats).

There was no Thief class in Original D&D until Supplement 1: Greyhawk was released in '75, so halfling players functioned as fighting men (and as long as they stuck to the sling or shortbow they were frightfully effective, esp. if you were using Chainmail's man-to-man combat system).

Don't pollute my 1e or OD&D with that kender bullshit.

 

[Pentex]

Mongoose Publishing Presents ‘Shield Maidens’ TTRPG​

Feature Press Release Recent News
For the past 21 years, British company Mongoose Publishing has been on the forefront of the tabletop role playing game scene. The publisher originally focused on content for the most popular RPG ever, Dungeons & Dragons and has since been responsible for hugely popular miniatures and roleplaying games incarnating equally recognised properties like Babylon 5, Judge Dredd, Conan, Starship Troopers and many others.
Currently, Mongoose Publishing is still making a splash with Traveller (probably the most iconic SF RPG ever), 2300 AD, Sea of Thieves, Paranoia (still standing tall as the funniest role playing game out there) and Legend.
On 1st April, the publisher is set to achieve another milestone with its high-profile Kickstarter for Shield Maidens, a Viking cyberpunk tabletop roleplaying game.

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About the Setting
For centuries, the people of Midgard have been under the powerful hold of the cruel Fenrir Empire, which has been tightening its grasp throughout the nine realms, squeezing the life essence from each world it is able to reach. The branches of the cosmic tree Yggdrasil are dying and the land is shrouded in what seems to be an endless winter. High up in the skies, the gods are waging war on each other as the twilight of their days looms near. Still, ancient dragons sitting on other-worldy branches are predicting the dawn of a new age once the wheel of eternity starts turning again.

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The duty to usher in this season full of promises falls to the Shield Maidens, the great heroes who carry the awe-inspiring Guardian Shields. Tasked by the goddess Freya to prevent Ragnarok, their very presence presents the most palpable threat Fenrir is facing, making them both feared and hatred across the entire empire.

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As the agents of Fenrir try to stifle free thought and social justice, crush individuality and deny diversity, the Shield Maidens stand tall, a beacon of light to all living beings within the nine realms.

About Shield Maidens and Being Inclusive​

In 1945, the famous scientist/philosopher Karl Popper coined the term ‘the paradox of tolerance’. He was right: as long as we stay tolerant towards intolerance, we allow intolerance to exist and thrive. Somewhat paradoxically, the very word ‘tolerance’ has become a pejorative noun, infused with the sense that we have to be permissive of things or people we don’t like, just because that’s the right attitude. Instead of being tolerant towards all sexual orientations, genders, cultures and ideologies, as long as they don’t aim to hurt others, the writers of Shield Maidens want to embrace everyone with open arms – whether they be straight, lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer/questioning, or asexual.

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Even though the gamer community is well-known for being one of the most open-minded out there, there have only been a few indie tabletop roleplaying games that openly embrace LGBTQIA+ people. Shield Maidens allows everyone to play brave futuristic Viking women, battling injustice, prejudice and fear, without being too much ‘in your face’. The best way to love one another is, after all, not to discriminate, and heterosexual gamers will find just as much to enjoy within the vibrant pages of this game as anyone else. The focus of the game remains the obstacles presented by the Fenrir Empire, but the scope is epic, with deities battling each other and a single organisation holding entire worlds in its crippling grasp.

https://www.5d-blog.com/shield-maidens-ttrpg/