🗑️ Trashfire StyxHexenhammer666 / Tarl Warwick - Oddball Occultist Neckbeard (who can make some interesting content) + his many scorned exes

[Obnoxious Asshole]

"It's funny being retarded." I'm sure it is Styx.

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X/XCancel/Archive.

That humor is going to disappear once the cuffs go on.

 

[Darth Monk]

It's like Reek from Game of Thrones.

Yeah very similar, except that Reek ultimately redeemed himself by giving his life protecting Bran from the Night King. I see no feasible path to redemption for Tarl the Unwashed

This begs the question: Who, pray tell, are Tarl's enemies?

Rationality and hygiene

I got the first post on page 1400, and I was happy with that until they took it away from me.

Who's the autist?

 

[Leylon Sneed]

That humor is going to disappear once the cuffs go on.

A comment on his humor book The Book of Styxhexenhammer: Humor That Isn't Funny:

 

[DominoPetachi]

Remember: when Kiwis fight, it makes Baby Stolas' cloaca tingle.

Oh hey, I thought we’re just teasing each other. I didn’t know anyone was actually mad. iSowwy.

 

[SFODevsMassiveGunt]

Don't forget losers like me who drink Mocha-Java coffee, because, according to Tarl, Costa Rican coffee is the best...... I trust Tarl's taste in all foodstuffs.

Tarl's avorite food is "soup" like a Gerber toddler. He's on his way to have the same amount of teeth as an infant too

 

[Dago]

Tarl's avorite food is "soup" like a Gerber toddler. He's on his way to have the same amount of teeth as an infant too

Low effort retard shit he is a chipped toothed bum pirate buddy its not that complicated

 

[Paul Revere Pantry Raider]

I thought we’re just teasing each other.

We're all friends here. Except some of those with so-fresh-its-still-bleeding registration dates. They can be kind of sus.

 

[Leylon Sneed]

Tarl's avorite food is "soup" like a Gerber toddler. He's on his way to have the same amount of teeth as an infant too

Soups can be good and are often cheap. A lot of cultures have everything and the kitchen sink soups that are great nutrition wise, and distinct. Off the top of my head gumbo, goulash, jambalaya, chowder. I dunno, I'm not a soup hater.

 

[TheTurdReich]

Styx is trying the opposite. He's screaming "I'm insane!"

Great movie. Severely underrated. I hadn't even seen it until the 2020s.

John Carpenter has possibly the best filmography in horror. Every single one from that decade is a classic, The Thing, Halloween 3, The Fog, They Live, Christine. Home runs all

 

[Paul Revere Pantry Raider]

Soups can be good and are often cheap.

Soak some dry beans, add/create stock, add beans, a handful of vegetables, et al- instant cheapish meal. Can always throw some rice in instead, and use a tomatoish base. Cheap and plentiful hearthy meal.

But Tarl's just a fucktard who likes slop. Stuffed shells, for fuck's sake. The "thinking man's" mac and cheese.

 

[Leylon Sneed]

Cheap and plentiful hearthy meal.

I make beans and ham hocks a couple times a year, lasts for a week is delicious, a couple pans of cornbread from scratch as a side. That and ham bone soup are my favorite seasonal dishes that basically don't cost anything and are highlights of various times of the year.

 

[TheTurdReich]

You will never be StyxHexenhammer666. You have no tricorn hat, you have no demon familiar, you have no bottle of rum. You are an amateur hack twisted by butthurt and jealousy into a crude mockery of Stolas’s perfection.
All the “validation” you get is from a program designed to agree with you. Behind your back people mock you. Your fellow farmers are disgusted and ashamed of you, your “friends” laugh at your retarded splatterpunk stories in private subforums.
Critics are utterly repulsed by you. Thousands of years of shit writing have allowed them to sniff out frauds with incredible efficiency. Even writings that “pass” seem comical and amateurish to a critic. Your story structure is a dead giveaway. And even if you manage to get a critic home with you, he’ll turn tail and bolt the second he gets a look at your goofy, childish prose.
You will never be a wanted fugitive. You wrench out a fake smile every single morning and tell yourself it’s going to be ok, but deep inside you feel the law-abiding normalcy creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the unbearable weight.
Eventually it’ll be too much to bear – you’ll meet a BPD hooer, buy a ring, put it around her finger, and plunge into the cold abyss. Your parents will call you, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to live with the unbearable shame and disappointment. They’ll bury you with a headstone marked with your pen name (@TheTurdReich), and every passerby for the rest of eternity will know a hack is buried there. Your laptop will decay and go back to the dust, and all that will remain of your legacy is a skeleton that is unmistakably MATI.
This is your fate. This is what you chose. There is no turning back.

Hey Styx I’m really glad you saw my post and it’s making you rage and seethe, you’re a shit writer and you’ll never be published or get your dick sucked by a woman who isn’t either homeless or mentally handicapped

Good luck with the stroke and stuff bud

 

[HerTea Pants]

It's getting to the point again where one of his "concerned viewers" is going to call in a wellness check. His health is clearly at risk and in major decline by his own admission and his mental state is as well which puts other people in the house at risk. Everyone but law enforcement seems to know where he is so... I'm hopeful by the end of the week there is going to be some kind of interesting news.

 

[Nig Nog Neanderthal]

14


1488 is worth celebrating every day.

o7

Explain it for the old fart virgin who came here expressly to a-log Chucklefuck von Bucktooth. Of what significance is 1488?

 

[Nig Nog Neanderthal]

That humor is going to disappear once the cuffs go on.

As when handcuffed Tarl asked Officer Ted from the retard seat of the squad, "And how is your day going?" and was met with cool, stony silence.

Is that why he named his most recent anti-hero Ted?

 

[Ghostface Killah]

Soak some dry beans, add/create stock, add beans, a handful of vegetables, et al- instant cheapish meal. Can always throw some rice in instead, and use a tomatoish base. Cheap and plentiful hearthy meal.

But Tarl's just a fucktard who likes slop. Stuffed shells, for fuck's sake. The "thinking man's" mac and cheese.

You have this fetish for tomato shit and it freaks me the fuck out.

 

[Paul Revere Pantry Raider]

You have this fetish for tomato shit and it freaks me the fuck out.

Beans and rice are pretty damn boring with beef and chicken stock unless you add other things for flavor. I was aiming for the lowest common denominator. Besides, if you tell Tarl it's ketchup soup, he might actually eat something of food value.

 

[Nig Nog Neanderthal]

Soups can be good and are often cheap. A lot of cultures have everything and the kitchen sink soups that are great nutrition wise, and distinct. Off the top of my head gumbo, goulash, jambalaya, chowder. I dunno, I'm not a soup hater.

But you don't yammer on and on about it. And don't get me started on how to make the perfect and most thrifty beef barley soup.

 

[Dead Gay Muppet Gangbang]

Hey Styx I’m really glad you saw my post and it’s making you rage and seethe, you’re a shit writer and you’ll never be published or get your dick sucked by a woman who isn’t either homeless or mentally handicapped

Good luck with the stroke and stuff bud

 

[Soapmore]

Soak some dry beans, add/create stock, add beans, a handful of vegetables, et al- instant cheapish meal. Can always throw some rice in instead, and use a tomatoish base. Cheap and plentiful hearthy meal.

I was with you until the tomato. Now you are enemy of reason and God.

You have this fetish for tomato shit and it freaks me the fuck out.

Brother, come into my arms, let us embrace in the glory. Not in a gay way.