Stephen Colbert is writing a LOTR sequel - This is unfortunately very real

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100% they'd go "Not all Orcs" and how they were not responsible for their actions.

It will also probably do the Aragorn Tax Policy where he is shamed by a Woman for not knowing how to govern despite 100+ years of life experience.
 
Let me guess, Sauron is a bad Orange Man and has tiny peepeepoopoo hands and wants to make Mordor great again by deporting all the hobbits?
 
From what I recall, Colbert is an extremely knowledgeable Tolkien nerd....
BUT
I have zero faith in him as a writer, and zero faith in his character and integrity post Colbert Show.
I do not want this ghoul near my beloved series.
Libs want to take your favorite series and rape it in front of you South Park Indiana Jones style
 
TheArtilleryman said:
There needs to be an official name for the cutoff point where a franchise gets hijacked by modern day propagandists, and is then bled dry and subsequently killed off for the sake of promoting their message. It's happened enough now that I feel it should have a name, something to easily denote that dark period in culture where every franchise, even some over a century old, just up and fucking died within a single decade for some political message. We need to disregard it all in hindsight, simply for the sake of reviving them later and telling our kids "yeah the 2010s stuff was a bit fucked up, it gets better again after that".
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Jumped the shark plushie.
 
They really love raping everything that is beautiful, don't they? You know I'm surprised they've never tried acquiring rights to old Russian literature like Dostoevsky and make a modern faggot version of say, Crime and Punishment, to le own evil Russia (and anything written by Christians)
 
>Meanwhile, Sam’s daughter, Elanor, has discovered a long-buried secret
I bet I know what it was. It was something far more sinister than anything anyone can ever imagine...
Two Scoops
 
TheArtilleryman said:
There needs to be an official name for the cutoff point where a franchise gets hijacked by modern day propagandists, and is then bled dry and subsequently killed off for the sake of promoting their message. It's happened enough now that I feel it should have a name, something to easily denote that dark period in culture where every franchise, even some over a century old, just up and fucking died within a single decade for some political message. We need to disregard it all in hindsight, simply for the sake of reviving them later and telling our kids "yeah the 2010s stuff was a bit fucked up, it gets better again after that".
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I just call it zombie franchising, because they are taking something that was created by a dead person and hijacking the popularity of that world and/or characters for their own agenda.
They are literally bringing these creators and their creations back from the dead like a zombie and franchising them out for their own monetary gain or propaganda purposes.
Let the dead rest in peace. Come up with your own shit instead of zombie franchising, Hackywood.
 
WhoBusTank69 said:
What's the reason for this, apart from him having lots of spare time now?
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Colbert is a known LoTR sperg, however, he should just go on Ao3 like the other fanfic writers.
Calandrino said:
How do you know it won't be good, it's not even done yet
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Pls see here:
Toji Suzuhara said:
The fuck you mean passing? Frodo never died, he went to Valinor. Not even the first sentence in and this is already less in line with the canon than RoP
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Battlefield2142EU said:
Especially if the rumors of the Harry Potter reboot making Voldemort a woman are true.
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The what now?
1774447028623.jpeg
Jesus, it’s all so exhausting…
 
Korpon said:
They really love raping everything that is beautiful, don't they?
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The thing is that most people are mindless consumers so they don't care, they will consume Da Rangs of Powah made by Steven Colbert and get out of the theater saying: "Eh, it was good", I recently was in a family reunion and one guy and his wife were talking about how they watched all the Lord of the Rings movies with their kids, and after that they saw The Rings of Power, the kids were about 10 years old, wanna know what their review of Da Rangs of Powah was? "Eh, it was good"; Most people just want a decent time waster and are not interested in the franchise, there is way more people like this than people with good taste, so appealing to these witless brutes is a good business strategy.

Also remember that Hollywood is all about money laundering, so something that might look it failed actually did decent because the "cost" number is fake.
 
Battlefield2142EU said:
Odds are good that Stephen Colbert, Lord of the Rings, will make people miss Rings of Power. I have a feeling that diversity casting will be seen as the lesser evil compared to what is to come, honestly. Especially if the rumors of the Harry Potter reboot making Voldemort a woman are true. The racial stunt casting in Harry Potter and rings of power will be the least of the shows problems.
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Nigger this is the same lame shit we've been putting up with since 2016 (technically earlier in some shit but it really kicked into gear in 2016)
I'm tired, nothing will be "lesser evil" it's all just the same shit on loop constantly framed as new and just happening
 
JULAY said:
I propose the term "faggotized".

FAGGOTIZE - (transitive, derogatory) To make or depict as faggoty. Past participle - FAGGOTIZED

EXAMPLE: "Star Trek is a beloved classic science fiction franchise that dates back to the 1960s, but during Alex Kurtzman's tenure as showrunner, it became quite faggotized"
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Faggot also means a bundle of sticks, sticks are made from wood and the term "wooden" can be used as a negative descriptor meaning "awkward" or "unconvincing". I expect someone else could get something better but I propose "wooden age".
 
GratsTheat783 said:
I expect someone else could get something better but I propose "wooden age".
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Thing is wood is useful for building. This isn't building shit. it's just running a loop of the same shit from the last decade that's never stopped.


Telvanni said:
Libs want to take your favorite series and rape it in front of you South Park Indiana Jones style
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What's funny about the south park indiana jones was it was just an over the top edgy joke about the slightly dissapointing indiana jones sequel having cgi shots and ayys in it but it was actually a movie that's plot was in dev hell with the alien twist as the core part since the start and there's still passion in it. There's no passion in the shit coming out now and it's a lot more closer to actual literal parallel with that scene.
 
Tolkien himself gave up on this saying that there was no story to tell.

Oh and the focus is on Sam's daughter uncovering that the story Tolkien wrote was all lies.

The fact that Peter Jackson and his life partner are involved proves he is a hack that never understood or cared about the books.

This is such an insult to Tolkien, the idea that the worst late night host of all time can rewrite The Lord of the Rings and tell a story Tolkien could not is such an insult to the man.
 
Battlefield2142EU said:
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Odds are good that Stephen Colbert, Lord of the Rings, will make people miss Rings of Power. I have a feeling that diversity casting will be seen as the lesser evil compared to what is to come, honestly. Especially if the rumors of the Harry Potter reboot making Voldemort a woman are true. The racial stunt casting in Harry Potter and rings of power will be the least of the shows problems.
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I guess they are trying to save on the special effects budget.
 
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