💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

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When will Jack drop dead?

  • February-March 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • April-May 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • June-July 2024

    Votes: 17 1.1%
  • August-September 2024

    Votes: 34 2.2%
  • October-November 2024

    Votes: 37 2.4%
  • December 2024

    Votes: 44 2.8%
  • Sometime in 2025

    Votes: 258 16.6%
  • Sometime in 2026

    Votes: 252 16.2%
  • Jack lives forever. The Wendigo Must Consoom

    Votes: 904 58.0%

  • Total voters
    1,558
How has he not died of covid yet?
He’s probably had it with no symptoms and was a super spreader as he waddled his fat ass around the finest BWW, Arby’s and Chili’s chains in the suburbs of Nashville. He’s definitely a super spreader of salmonella if nothing else, anyway.
 
How has he not died of covid yet?
Jack is destined to go out with a bang: freak accident, megastroke, murder-suicide on the behalf of Hammy, etc. I, for one, look forward to Jack's death being preserved on some form of digital media, either by a restaurant patron or perhaps a livestream.
 
I hope zombie Julia Child comes back and rips his lungs out and feeds them to him.
She hasn’t?

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Jack is destined to go out with a bang: freak accident, megastroke, murder-suicide on the behalf of Hammy, etc. I, for one, look forward to Jack's death being preserved on some form of digital media, either by a restaurant patron or perhaps a livestream.
i remember in one of the old polls asking posters to predict when and how jack would die, someone responded with "beaten to death by a gang of angry chefs" and i'm really hoping they end up being right
 
Have you noticed Jack's favorite booth at BWW is fucking filthy? I wonder if they reserve that seat for him, or if he self selects.
 
Which boggles the mind because the one man responsible for making electric cars popular is very much right wing. This is truely the most bipartisan idea: the left want it for being easier on the ecosystem, the right want one because it's from Musk.

Same concept with anti-vaxers: Who the fuck cut the red tape for pharma companies to make the vaccine? Trump! Without him, we might still be under mandates while the vaccine might roll out this year...maybe.
The people that make these crazy accusations aren't known to be the deepest thinkers out there. It's all reactionary and based on either politics or social issues that happen to be happening right now. It's on the right and it's on the left. Neither side is pure and blameless in this.

It's not even the right recipe which shows he just got it off somebody's website.

Spaghetti Marco Polo, at least how Julia did it, has the following ingredients:

Tuna - from a can.
Red pimentos, not roasted red peppers.
Green onions.
Black olives.
Walnuts.
Swiss cheese.
And it calls for fresh herbs, not dried ones.

There's a lack of garlic and tomato in it. But trust Mushbrain not to actually research the recipe but just Google it and find the first one.

It looks like Julia Child made this recipe with Mr. Rogers. It was meant to be an easy recipe for kids. Tells the kids to get adults to do all the chopping for them.
That's exactly the reason why. It was a way for kids to be able to make a simple dish that the family could enjoy.
 
Even though he hates soda, he likes this. I'm guessing it's because of the Jack Daniel's brand, given his fixation with anything that bears his name. More of a bonus that Jack Daniel's is Tennessee whiskey. For once he isn't lying when he says he can barely lift his arm.

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You guys missed his "joke" and the ridiculous irony coming from Jack. He's calling people who buy this lazy.
 
No wonder he's the way he is. He probably has that article printed out and framed in his "studio".
Jack’s just like the proprietor of a has-been eatery that’s falling apart in atmosphere and QC. Most of these owners will have favorable reviews and articles from like, 1987, framed on the wall. The paper will be yellowed from age, yet these guys use it as a cope, because they cling to past praise and think it means jack shit in the present day. Much like Jack and his moribund channels.


1:35 "sun-dried tomatoes"
4:48 "roasted red peppers"
6:08 "sun-roasted tomatoes"
7:42 "roasted red.... uh.... tomatoes" (at this point I think Jack realized he fucked up)
With each passing upload, his brain gets closer and closer to the consistency of applesauce. As Joshua Perper said, “he is…deteriorating…at an accelerated rate!”


Even though he hates soda, he likes this. I'm guessing it's because of the Jack Daniel's brand, given his fixation with anything that bears his name. More of a bonus that Jack Daniel's is Tennessee whiskey. For once he isn't lying when he says he can barely lift his arm.

View attachment 3388477
This, after he made a huge fuss about soda being unhealthy and directed his audience to not buy it in his recently-recorded attempt to wax intelligent about frugality.

Fuck you, Jack.

Also, that abomination of a video is seriously reminding me of this one:
In both cases, you have a narcissistic fat faggot pushing advice that he *never* follows himself. The tips are about as autistic as you can imagine, even though the video was made during Jack’s more coherent years.
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Jack’s just like the proprietor of a has-been eatery that’s falling apart in atmosphere and QC. Most of these owners will have favorable reviews and articles from like, 1987, framed on the wall. The paper will be yellowed from age, yet these guys use it as a cope, because they cling to past praise and think it means jack shit in the present day. Much like Jack and his moribund channels.



With each passing upload, his brain gets closer and closer to the consistency of applesauce. As Joshua Perper said, “he is…deteriorating…at an accelerated rate!”



This, after he made a huge fuss about soda being unhealthy and directed his audience to not buy it in his recently-recorded attempt to wax intelligent about frugality.

Fuck you, Jack.

Also, that abomination of a video is seriously reminding me of this one:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=9gbUM9oHBNIIn both cases, you have a narcissistic fat faggot pushing advice that he *never* follows himself. The tips are about as autistic as you can imagine, even though the video was made during Jack’s more coherent years.
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This list of tips from back in the day is mostly just fine. Too bad, because if Jagoff wasn’t such a fuckin’ hypocrite he likely could’ve dodged both Stroke #1 & Stroke #2 …
 
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Julia references the Mr. Rogers appearance. I thought that segment was awkward, but this later version made me dislike Jane Pauley, it felt like she was rushing the segment and being rude.

One thing I find fascinating about this later take is that Julia Child knew to use ingredients, but not to overuse them. The specific quote is "You can always add more"

I don't know if we've EVER seen Jack show restraint, aside from the lies about "one bite".

I've been paring my food back lately, mainly because of budget, but I've also noticed I no longer experience the disgusting over full feeling that I was honestly used to. Sometimes I might not have as much as I'd want, but I'm certainly getting enough to fill the need to eat.

Granted, you can't exactly put a fucking Wendigo on a diet.
 
Since we know that Jack pregames his day with children's television, he should have tuned into Mr. Rogers while he was preparing this one. Julia teaches literal children how to make spaghetti Marco Polo, and explains that you should use steaming hot spaghetti, red pimento, finely chopped olives, tuna in oil, fresh parsley, and swiss cheese for this dish. She even teaches the class how to maintain a wooden cutting board and use chopsticks, skills I know Jack has yet to grasp. Her recipe is most likely simplified for her audience, but it's pretty far from what Jack's presenting.

Mister Rogers, Julia Child, and Chef Brocket.....mp4
Couldn't he have just watched this video and copied the recipe directly from the show he supposedly loved? Hell, he could have used his fancy new mac book to splice in some snippets from this Julia episode as he was preparing his ingredients. But wait, that would actually take some sort of effort on his part.
 
https://youtube.com/watch?v=vIya7FJcd8M
Julia references the Mr. Rogers appearance. I thought that segment was awkward, but this later version made me dislike Jane Pauley, it felt like she was rushing the segment and being rude.

One thing I find fascinating about this later take is that Julia Child knew to use ingredients, but not to overuse them. The specific quote is "You can always add more"

I don't know if we've EVER seen Jack show restraint, aside from the lies about "one bite".

I've been paring my food back lately, mainly because of budget, but I've also noticed I no longer experience the disgusting over full feeling that I was honestly used to. Sometimes I might not have as much as I'd want, but I'm certainly getting enough to fill the need to eat.

Granted, you can't exactly put a fucking Wendigo on a diet.
That’s Joan Lunden not Jane Pauley.
 
He’s proof that there is no god. There are people who got the virus and died but this sack of fat is dodging the C bullets. Maybe he is the chosen one lol
Despite all of the warnings over obesity being an aggravating factor for severe Covid, every deathfat on this site (and Jack will always be a deathfat to me) who got Covid waddled away relatively unscathed. Someone needs to study these people.
 
That’s Joan Lunden not Jane Pauley.
You're correct. I noticed, in Julia's later years, that when she did shows like this that they did tend to rush her. It always bothered me because it's not like her mannerisms aren't known. When she did her show with Jacques Pepin you get a little of that from him, but it's absolutely not rude. He moreso keeps her on task. I always got the sense that she enjoyed cooking so much that she could get in the weeds about the process. In fact, if you read her recipes, they're very thorough to the point that simpletons don't have the patience for them (see: Jack). When they were written, though, they were intended to give the average cook the knowledge and confidence to cook just the way Julia does as long as they just follow the steps. We all know that Jack does not have the patience to really give respect to the process of cooking the food. I think that may be one of his defining features.

If I was dedicating an entire month to my supposed idol then I'd respect her enough to BUY her work, properly cite it, research the times she demonstrated it and either refer to that or splice footage. What I wouldn't do is scour mommy blogs for a bastardization and then bastardize that and call it my "idol's" work. He could buy Mastering the Art of French Cooking, which is a staple in kitchens of even serious home cooks along with The Joy of Cooking, and at least be able to transcribe the source recipe and then make "modern adjustments" if necessary. Of course, that would require this asshole understanding what ingredients are appropriate for substitutions or are more in line with modern tastes.

I wish he'd do a terrine. I know he won't, but I'd fucking love it. Maybe a pate. It'd be glorious.
 
Reminder that Jagoff bought Julia Child's books for performative reasons, and for his shriveled walnut brain to enjoy the sweet dopamine hit from Facebook reacts.

He is, however, so retarded and lazy that, despite having the fucking books sitting in front of him, he choose to copy paste adapted recipes from random blogs on the internet.

The books are also not cheap too. Last time I checked it costs upwards of $40+ for a used copy on ebay. Jagoff doesn't care - it's Mommywife's Amex anyways.
 
I have more of the “little birdie” singing…

I removed some identifying information, but here’s the gist of what was said.

Jack writes off every OTG food purchase. The Vegas trips had to have been write-offs as well not only for the OTG reviews, but he used to have a customer out there that bought his sauce so he could use that delivery as a write-off. I don’t know if he still has any customers out here in the west anymore. When they first moved to TN, his father-in-law used to make the deliveries for him to the 3-4 brick-and-mortar customers he had. Not sure what happened once they moved out there and who, if anyone, took over the delivery. I’m sure he switched to drop-ship because he changed sauce manufacturers.

Jack is just so full of crap. I think it’s common knowledge that Tammy didn’t go to college. Jack told me that you just find a small, former college that burnt down or something and say you went there. They have no way of looking you up because the campus is now defunct. That’s where Tammy’s college “degree” is from. Some defunct college in south Orange County. He told me this personally!

Then in the same breath, he’ll virtue signal that he doesn’t believe in copying music files and having non-purchased music. Really? But it’s okay to rip off recipes and call them yours and fake college degrees? Really?
That’s all the tea I have this week.
 
Jack’s just like the proprietor of a has-been eatery that’s falling apart in atmosphere and QC. Most of these owners will have favorable reviews and articles from like, 1987, framed on the wall. The paper will be yellowed from age, yet these guys use it as a cope, because they cling to past praise and think it means jack shit in the present day. Much like Jack and his moribund channels.



With each passing upload, his brain gets closer and closer to the consistency of applesauce. As Joshua Perper said, “he is…deteriorating…at an accelerated rate!”



This, after he made a huge fuss about soda being unhealthy and directed his audience to not buy it in his recently-recorded attempt to wax intelligent about frugality.

Fuck you, Jack.

Also, that abomination of a video is seriously reminding me of this one:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=9gbUM9oHBNIIn both cases, you have a narcissistic fat faggot pushing advice that he *never* follows himself. The tips are about as autistic as you can imagine, even though the video was made during Jack’s more coherent years.
View attachment 3389317
View attachment 3389318
That's just Jagoff acting like he has willpower and telling his fat son that he needs to eat better because Qtard Cali was a chubby little kid and Mushbrain when he was small wasn't. But that was because his Mom was on food stamps and his Dad was an alcoholic or something.
 
Sure, but what about the lions and bears and hyenas and shit?

Also I might just be too high tonight but do ALL creationists deny evolution? Like I know the whole point of creationists is that they don't believe in evolution, it's just weirding me out tonight.
I think the general consensus among ark-believers is that if zoos can manage to handle predators why couldn't an ark. The story does say that extra food animals were brought on board. It doesn't really say whether the extras were to provide food for carnivores, or to feed the people on board, or to ensure that the prey animal population would have a head start so they weren't immediately killed off once the doors are open and everything's set free. Probably some combination of all those factors.

Regarding creationists, Christian does not equal creationist, so if you say "creationist" you're basically already limiting your category to the people who deny evolution. However there are a few general types... there are people who believe in a literal six-day creation (and a seventh day of rest). There are also people who believe that God just set a general plan in motion and let evolution finish the process (the so-called "day-age" theory is that each "day" in the creation story corresponds to an era of evolutionary history).

If we're talking about literal six-day creationists, they tend to disbelieve evolution to the point that they think mutations tend to cause variety but (even given unlimited time) won't change an animal into a different "kind" of animal. They believe that God created a limited number of "kinds" of animals, and mutations can increase the variety within a kind but they'll never cross some sort of invisible boundary that defines the "kind." (Scientists of course do the best they can, you know, but they're not God, so "species" and "kind" are not perfectly equivalent. :smug:)

Of course there are also plenty of Christians who aren't creationist.
 
Jack's been on a tear today. Get your :lunacy:s ready.

Newsflash - it's hot in the summer, especially if you're stuck in a beachball of insulating adipose.

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Reverend Dr. Jack has graduated from the Facebook theology program:

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A reminder that Jack is ALWAYS RIGHT:

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Reece steps up to start the inevitable angy DFE.
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Jack inches ever closer to just telling us how he really feels about those black people:

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My God, he's still going:

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