🎨 Artcow Iconoclast / Jonathan Mack Sweet - The Chris-Chan of Arkansas

[lindsayfan]

blim blim blim

 

[melty]

So he took something I made and did a subpar knockoff of it, who would have thought? I'm kind of flattered because he prefers to rip off of talented people, so it's like a weird compliment, in a way.

 

[Dr. Merkwurdichliebe]

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"Trying to turn my friends against me with lies."

What friends? He's never mentioned a single one. Ever.

Does he mean the guy who got him hired at The Herald? The guy who threatened to sic the police on him if he ever contacted him again? That happened years before this thread ever existed.

 

[Chan the Wizard]

Ok Sweets, when have you ever actually tried one of our ideas?
The photoshop with the rug on your head doesn't count, because you've never actually went out and bought a wig.

A couple of points: there is no "ex-girlfriend." You were never in a relationship with her. She was a troll.

You're never going back to ASU. Get over it. It's been nearly 20 years. You're banned. You're legally barred from ever returning. You've harassed their employees and made terroristic threats. It's over, move on with your life.

You have no "ex-business partner." You had a boss in the loosest sense. He was more of a babysitter for his girlfriend's autistic son and you somehow managed to mess that up by being a racist lunatic.

We've never been mad at you for building your own imaginary ASU. You're just an older, more pathetic Chris-Chan, after all, so it's expected for you to have your own CWCVille.

You don't have friends, so there's no one for us to turn against you.

And hey, remember the time those black guys beat up your mother while you hid and did nothing? Deh nuh sistem not tell you what do?

 

[The I Scream Man]

If anything that's been said in this thread from our esteemed "magic phantom sources" is actually a lie, Jonny, feel free to provide the truth.

 

[melty]

Hilariously he seems to have just stolen my template from a month ago and wasted a bunch of time making his own points fit in MS Paint https://kiwifarms.net/threads/iconoclast.860/page-228#post-921043
To make it in the first place I really just looked up "bingo generator" or something.. no need to spend all that time formatting sweetie pie.

 

[Ti-99/4A]

Hilariously he seems to have just stolen my template from a month ago and wasted a bunch of time making his own points fit in MS Paint https://kiwifarms.net/threads/iconoclast.860/page-228#post-921043
To make it in the first place I really just looked up "bingo generator" or something.. no need to spend all that time formatting sweetie pie.

No body told him that there's such a thing as a bingo generator!

 

[melty]

What a coincidence, nobody told me either! I guess I just figured out I can look things up before spending four hours in mspaint.

 

[He Sets Me On Fire]

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Wow. What an amazing collection of falsehoods and strawmen. And so clumsily worded, too!

No one ever said "everything you ever loved was a lie." I have pointed that out to Jon repeatedly.

We never said everyone lied to him. Ever. We said that "Ashleigh" was a troll.

We (I) insult Jon's looks/behavior/manner of dress because he's an ugly/stupid/hobo clown who has it coming.

We (primarily me) tell Jon he will die alone unless he changes because JON WILL DIE ALONE UNLESS HE CHANGES. He already tried to change himself to his satisfaction. He failed.

Jon has never tried one of "our" ideas. Ever. If he's thinking about the wig thing, he's dumber than I thought.

Jon has had two successes in life, both of which were graduating (though we were the ones that had to prove he did). He hasn't succeeded at anything since, not even the stupid, poorly-written editorials he had published.

We don't need to play up Jon's faults. He does that juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust fine by himself.

None of us get mad when he talks about going back to ASU, establishing his perv palace, or staying where he is, and there is not one single shred of evidence that Jon can provide of that. We don't get mad, we laugh at him and tell him it's a foolish idea. There's a significant difference. We giggle, he gets mad.

Jon has no real friends to turn against him, and he has not proven anything posted here to be a lie. Not one solitary post. Jon has, rather stupidly, misinterpreted posts, most embarrassingly when he had taken the friendly advice of a non-staffer who hadn't known that the site owner had prevented him from editing things. Being a paranoid delusional who needs enemies, Jon accused us of double speak, but since the owner had later clearly posted why he did what he did, Jon once again chose the path of incompetence to inform his thinking.

Jon is a liar. We have provided proof.

We have sympathy for Jon's former bosses because Jon is clearly a mentally and socially unstable turd-huffer and asshole. Oh, and suddenly, Dale is a "thieving" coward.

We have sympathy for Timbro because he has genuine problems that, even according to the game, he's getting help for. What's Jon's excuse? Oh, wait - he has a ton of them.

Jon NEVER HAD A GIRLFRIEND. EVER.

I accuse Jon of blim-blim talk, most others here call it Whitewash Jones speak. It's interesting. Jon is offended that we've labelled his mocking of us. He's offended at our reaction to the thing he wanted to offend us with. But you know what's funnier? Jon accuses us of accusing him of using blim-blim talk to mock us, just after he used blim-blim talk IN THE TOP SECOND PANEL OF THE IMAGE.

Jon isn't a victim. He's a trouble-making loser who came to this forum to "stir the pot", in his own words, merely to run away with his crooked tail tucked between his legs and his ass stinging.

Jon never once showed that we have ever used his past words out of context. Ever. We bring up that past stuff in order to show that he is just as much of an inept, cowardly cretin today as he was back then.

Jon's ideas are nothing more than Jon's reworked ideas. Just his, and his alone. We criticize them because they're fantastical, stupid, and impractical. We have no people. We are liberals and conservatives alike, with all shades in between.

So many of these squares are a wonderful description of Jon's weaknesses. Look at the words he uses: "sympathy," "getting mad," "bring up," "criticize," "downplaying."
What is Jon accusing us of here? Why is he flailing about so immaturely, copying our idea, when he could simply be using his allotted internet time more productively?

What's going on is that Jon's fantasy is being destroyed here. We are showing him, through "bringing up" his terrible past, and "criticizing" his stupid wish dreams, that he cannot move forward, and that the past will always show him that. He did nothing while his mom was beaten, he was helpless when his brother left him in the hospital, and was rendered powerless by every experience he had at The Herald where we pointed out that he was entirely at fault. We show him his limitations, his cowardice, his inability to defeat anyone. We are not the Left, or the Feminazis, or the Herald staff; we are the only people who will have anything to do with Jon, and we're bringing him the real. He can't stand it.

 

[The I Scream Man]

a furious beatdown

 

[ToroidalBoat]

Sweet has such an urge to get the last word (no matter how poor his position) that he made a nigh illegible and poorly thought out "Kiwi Bingo" card long after the Sweet Bingo one. It kind of reminds me of how he screencapped a post by Sanae Kochiya back when (s)he was known as "Thunder Cavalier" and then finally responded to it much later.

Getting a response from Sweet is sort of like Holdek said on the first page of this thread: it's like sending a signal to the outer solar system or deep space. You have to wait awhile for a reply.

 

[He Sets Me On Fire]

Up top, Ice! I like that!

While I'm at it -

For example, look at the last three squares of the second row. They tell me that where I'm living now is making me ill and aging me prematurely, but they are terrified of me returning to Arkansas State University...

No, we are not. We are not terrified, or even mildly perturbed, by anything he says or does. Strawman.

where I'd be far more emotionally and physically healthy, feel younger, eat better, have a weight room and jogging track to work out at, enjoy more social opportunities, and be far more tech-savvy, having constant exposure to new innovations and devices,

Well, since none of that seemed to work for you the first time he was at ASU ...

which in turn would greatly increase my productivity.

PFFFFFFTTT!!!

Basically they feel I should be consigned to life in a cheap, lonely little fleabag apartment somewhere-- nice, clean, sterile, and totally boring. Nothing like dorm life at all.

Hey, now, wait - I absolutely, categorically deny ever saying anything like that. Jon can freeze (or starve) to death in refrigerator box behind a pawn shop, as far as I'm concerned. Although, that would be a bit above his income level, and probably more than he could handle intellectually. Opening boxes is hard!

explain once again just why the modern progressive millennial moron doesn't understand the System that its leftist forebears created just a generation past

Jon doesn't understand Millennials, nor the previous generation. Plus, he doesn't know any Millennial progressives.

 

[Chan the Wizard]

"A cheap, lonely fleabag apartment" as opposed to the filthy, decaying hovel you share with your elderly mother?

 

[ToroidalBoat]

explain once again just why the modern progressive millennial moron[...]

At this point, I think that even hiring a skywriter to write out "NOT ALL KIWIS ARE PROGRESSIVES" won't convince Sweet of that. Also, a certain someone who got stuck in a hospital for 8 hours and tried to pass off "Tin Boo Tee" as an authentic Japanese name may need to reconsider calling others "morons."

 

[Dr. Merkwurdichliebe]

We have sympathy for Jon's former bosses because Jon is clearly a mentally and socially unstable turd-huffer and asshole. Oh, and suddenly, Dale is a "thieving" coward.

We have sympathy for Timbro because he has genuine problems that, even according to the game, he's getting help for. What's Jon's excuse? Oh, wait - he has a ton of them.

Jon's list of people we have sympathy for is far too brief.

Speaking only for myself, I have sympathy for his poor mom. I have sympathy for all of his other relatives. I have sympathy for his neighbors. I have sympathy for anyone who is forced to deal with him as part of their job. I have sympathy for all of the former Herald staffers who had to suffer because of him, including the ones who never even met him but whom he nonetheless relentlessly harassed from afar. I have boundless sympathy for his former roommates.

Hell, I have sympathy for anyone who has ever met him and for those who once caught a disturbing glimpse of him from a great distance.

And I have a special sympathy for all even vaguely jarlike objects that ever have or ever will come within the grasp of his greasy, bloated fingers, knowing that their fate -- as Jon himself boasts -- is one of horror beyond description.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

I've noticed another Sweet trend: evidence and witnesses against him being labeled as "phantom" and "magic" - like the sources Dr. Merkwurdichliebe is in touch with, or the SNL sketch.

I also notice that Sweet apparently addressed a point* I made a long while back by claiming that the only way he can get "tech-savvy" is by going back to ASU. Sweet really wants to get back into that computer lab.

Spoiler

*Awhile back, Sweet said that he's technologically behind because kicked out of ASU and exiled to a "technological backwater." I said something to the effect of that if one lives in the USA and has an internet connection, one can still be "tech-savvy." Especially if by "tech-savvy," one means "normally competent." Bear in mind that Sweet admitted to calling tech support to figure out a CD burner in a laptop, which is something that most people can figure out on their own.

 

[Le Bateleur]

I know this is Le Bateleur's job, but the Sweetness train must go on. The latest Belch Blog has shown up. Enjoy folks.

I don't mind at all if someone beats me to the latest edition. After all, this place is a communist millenial radicalisation camp

Those comic pages seemed to be harder to read than usual, but I did manage to find an example of what TVTropes would no doubt classify as "Author Appeal":

I love that Sweet thinks we're "terrified" of him going back to ASU. If he uploaded a video diary of his attempts at returning to ASU, I reckon we'd probably sponsor him through Patreon. However, we are talking about a guy who took eight hours to find his way out of a hospital...

 

[ToroidalBoat]

In a few years she'll look 30, but still act and think on par with a twelve-year old.

[insert photo of Chris Hansen here]

Is this part of Sweet's dating preferences? If so, Sweet probably needs to have a seat over there.

Spoiler

Although, Sweet is probably that age on the inside as well.

 

[MarineTrainedTard]

Cool bingo board, Sweet, you sure showed us.


Counterpoint: Let go of the past and move on with your life, or die in your condemned rotting shack never having known any sort of contentment. You're almost 40 goddamned years old, time to grow up a bit.

 

[AJMLurker]

What friends? He's never mentioned a single one. Ever.

I'm guessing Sweetness is referring to me, Treenbeen, Trollis, and the AJMers in general herr doktor. Before this whole incident happened, Sweet Bro had the entire AJM community as his friends for nearly a decade and we gave him endless asspats. Since this whole mess has occurred, Treenbeen, Trollis, and I have turned against Sweet and stopped asspatting him.

Sweet might be stupid, but I believe he picked up on the fact that the average AJMer did not defend his goofy beliefs in The System and The Liberal Conspiracy when you guys had access to the forum so he got butthurt about that.

As @Treenbeen explains in this post, the AJMers did not give a shit about Sweet's agenda, they just wanted the Kiwis to stop paying attention to the forum. I'm guessing Sweet picked up on the fact that the AJMers made no effort to defend his delusions against you EVUL PROGRESSIVE KIWIS and he blames this forum for that.

Spoiler: Treenbeen's AJM post

For example, look at the last three squares of the second row. They tell me that where I'm living now is making me ill and aging me prematurely, but they are terrified of me returning to Arkansas State University...

The only people terrified of you returning to ASU are the staff and current students. Unfortunately, they would have to suffer with your creepy presence. On the other hand, we here at the Kiwi Farms would love if you returned to ASU. Hell, we would beg you to record your very very short time there.