UN Ethiopian "prophet" arrested after trying to resurrect corpse - Once again, I can't improve on the headline

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-africa-44911913

An aspiring prophet has been arrested in Ethiopia after he failed to bring a dead man back to life.

Getayawkal Ayele had tried to revive the corpse of Belay Biftu by lying on top of him and repeatedly yelling "Belay, wake up".

It was not successful, and his failure enraged family members who began attacking Mr Getayawkal.

He was saved when police arrived shortly afterwards - although it did not mean he was out of trouble.

Abusing dead bodies is a crime under Ethiopian law and a local police commander has told the BBC that the man, whose real job is as a health worker, is now in custody.

The incident was filmed and has since gone viral on social media.

Residents in the small western town of Galilee, in the Oromia region, said Mr Getayawkal first went to the bereaved family and told them the story of Lazarus - who according to the New Testament was brought back to life by Jesus.

They then appear to have agreed to dig up Mr Belay.

After the failed resurrection, several members of the family fainted on the spot while others became angry and started beating Mr Getayawkal - at which point police arrived and arrested him.

At the risk of going total , this is your culture on religion.

 

[XYZpdq]

Should have stuck to chickens.

 

[Chaos Theorist]

He should of wished him back with the Dragonballs or learned the Edo Tensei jutsu tbh lads

 

[ES 148]

What an idiot, I bet he used up all his level 9 cleric spells

 

[Lord of the Large Pants]

In the Old Testament, any Israelite claiming to be a prophet was executed if their predictions failed to come true.

It substantially cut down on charlatans.

 

[TRUE ÞURSIAN WORSHIP]

It says the incident was filmed and went viral on social media. Where's the link, BBC? Did that EU link tax shit already go into effect?

Found it. Thanks for nothing, eurocucks

https://youtu.be/jdUXtdd5VhQ

 

[Pop-Tart]

I'm reminded of that Russian guy that tried to smuggle either uranium or plutonium to reanimate his dead friend.

Btw if anyone has a link to that please share it, I lost it.

 

[cypocryphy]

He just needed more time tbh.

 

[Draza]

Black prophet, lol.

 

[Kari Kamiya]

Fucking poser, you don't scream in a corpse's face "wake up", it's "arise". You gotta be more classy when you're speaking in tongues.

 

[Dysnomia]

I'm reminded of that Russian guy that tried to smuggle either uranium or plutonium to reanimate his dead friend.

Btw if anyone has a link to that please share it, I lost it.

That sounds like some crazy comic book plot the resurrects the guy as Plutonium Man.

This fraud is lucky that he wasn't killed. But it's still amazing that in 2018 people in Africa actually believe such things are possible. Africa isn't exactly a continent known for its disease control measures. Digging up a corpse could have sickened many with whatever awful thing this poor guy probably died from.

 

[Ginger Piglet]

Fucking poser, you don't scream in a corpse's face "wake up", it's "arise". You gotta be more classy when you're speaking in tongues.

And your gibberish has to sound like Aramaic or Latin, otherwise you have received insufficient Holy Spirit (which I'm sure is a metaphor for the episcopal sperm up the choir boy's arse.)

 

[Iwasamwillbe]

In the Old Testament, any Israelite claiming to be a prophet was executed if their predictions failed to come true.

It substantially cut down on charlatans.

At least after the Babylonian exile.

 

[Lord of the Large Pants]

At least after the Babylonian exile.

True. And another thing I just realized.

1 Kings 17:17 After this 16 the son of the woman who owned the house got sick. His illness was so severe he could no longer breathe. 17:18 She asked Elijah, “Why, prophet, have you come 17 to me to confront me with 18 my sin and kill my son?” 17:19 He said to her, “Hand me your son.” He took him from her arms, carried him to the upper room where he was staying, and laid him down on his bed. 17:20 Then he called out to the Lord, “O Lord, my God, are you also bringing disaster on this widow I am staying with by killing her son?” 17:21 He stretched out over the boy three times and called out to the Lord, “O Lord, my God, please let this boy’s breath return to him.” 17:22 The Lord answered Elijah’s prayer; the boy’s breath returned to him and he lived. 17:23 Elijah took the boy, brought him down from the upper room to the house, and handed him to his mother. Elijah then said, “See, your son is alive!” 17:24 The woman said to Elijah, “Now I know that you are a prophet and that the Lord really does speak through you.” 19

Shoulda stretched out on him a couple more times there, buddy.

 

[Capsaicin Addict]

Someone forgot you need a diamond for that Resurrection spell.

 

[The Great Chandler]

Should've used the Émigré Manuscript.
shadowhearts.wikia.com/wiki/Émigré_Manuscript
But that would mean turning into a monster.

 

[Maxliam]

Oh okay, when the Jewish guy does it, he's a hero and the king of kings. When a black dude does it, he's a criminal! Typical white male privilege!!!

 

[dunbrine47]

whose real job is as a health worker

Welcome to LOLthiopia.

 

[oldTireWater]

I like the looong pause where he tries to figure out how to explain it. He should have just lay there yelling until everyone got tired of watching.

 

[c-no]

In the Old Testament, any Israelite claiming to be a prophet was executed if their predictions failed to come true.

It substantially cut down on charlatans.

If Old Testament law was followed, this prophet and a guy from another part of the continent who fucked a goat would think twice before doing these sort of things.