Clarkson's Farm - Amazon Prime series about the most inept farmer... in the world

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Pee Cola

Pee Cola

"Teflon piss king" - Grok 2026
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
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Jan 27, 2020
Have any other Farmers seen this yet? It's almost as year late, but Clarkson's Farm has finally dropped on Amazon Prime and all good BT trackers.

I've only watched the first episode so far, but I'm really impressed. idk if it's the fact that Jezza has shown humility for the first time in two decades, or if it's the chemistry between him and most of the others on this show, but IMHO this is the best thing he's made in years.

Unlike Top Gear and The Grand Tour where the dumb shit he does is obviously scripted, the dumb shit he does in the first episode comes across as Clarkson not knowing any better.

For starters, Clarkson buys a tractor that's way too big. As an added bonus, he imported it from Germany. This posed a few problems and a couple of facepalms.

He also ignored the advice of not one but two experienced tractor operators, fucking up the seeding process at least twice.

The best bit of this whole show is a young farmer named Kaleb. Imagine a stereotypical British farmer (complete with the 'oo-arr' accent) that looks like Ed Sheeran if he ate one too many pies. As an added bonus, Kaleb is 21 and talks to Clarkson as though he's just some pleb rather than a world famous celebrity. The crazy part is that Kaleb and Jezza actually have some solid rapport going on. Maybe not at the same level as the rapport with May and Hammond, but I'm only one episode in so it'll probably develop more over the rest of the series.

So yeah... if you're a Clarkson fan, you'll enjoy this. If you hate Clarkson's guts, you'll enjoy this. Either way, it impressed me enough to risk a barrage of puzzle pieces to sperg about here.
 
It's not bad. Only a couple of episodes in but there's a decent bit of humour and some actual partially informative stuff in there.

I am waiting for people to complain about all the mentions of rape though.

Apparently it was going to be called "Bought The Farm" at one point.

https://www.fwi.co.uk/farm-life/7-epic-fails-on-jeremy-clarksons-farm-so-far (I'm not bothering putting in the various images in the article,)

Hands up if you’ve ever heard somebody declare that they’d love to be a farmer like you – it must be such a joy to work out in the countryside all day.

Well, TV presenter Jeremy Clarkson is gradually learning that life on the farm isn’t all green grass and shepherd’s delight.

These days he’s farming about 400ha of land in the Cotswolds, growing wheat, barley and oilseed rape and also running a flock of sheep.

See also: Jeremy Clarkson on his own farm, red tape, sheep and sheds

His trials and tribulations are being documented for an eight-part series called I Bought The Farm, which follows the Grand Tour presenter as he attempts to run his own working farm in Oxfordshire.

The show is in production and is expected to be released on Amazon Prime next year. It promises to be a big hit with farming audiences.

Ahead of its release, Jeremy has been serving up sporadic snapshots of what’s happening on Diddly Squat Farm – and most of it isn’t what we’d call ideal.


Here are seven things that haven’t gone according to plan for Farmer Clarkson so far. To quote the man himself: “How hard can it be?”

1. Feeling deflated​

Ever get the feeling that the farming gods are against you? This is a sure sign.

2. Lambo-gged down​

Ahh, the Lamborghini R8 270 DCR (we think). It would seem that Lambo tractors aren’t brilliant off-road.

Mind you, it would help if you had some tread left on those tyres, Jeremy.

Explore moreKnow How​

Visit our Know How centre for practical farming advice

3. Unintentional mob grazing​

It’s widely accepted that sheep are the second-best escape artists after pigs. We hope Farmer Clarkson opted for a barley variety with good standing ability.

4. Nurturing nature
Jeremy’s daughter found this poorly young tawny owl in the woods. Having named it Boris, he pledged to nurse the sickly owlet back to health.

It died soon after.

5. Crop failure​

Oh dear. Have you tried upping the seed rate a tad?

6. Tillage troubles​

How on earth this happened we do not know.

7. More crop failure​

That maize looks about as good as the American accent sounds.


Niggles aside, it’s clear that Clarkson is loving his farming lifestyle and genuinely seems to care about quality food production and environmental management, which we think is fantastic.

Just give us a shout if you need any agricultural advice in the future, Jeremy.
Click to expand...
 
I just finished the series and it's overall really good. It's great to see Jezza back on screen and see what he has been up to since the last Grand Tour episode. Him becoming a farmer probably an indication of his retirement path, which is pretty damn cool.

There are a lot of classic Jezza moments and he still is himself. I chuckled at his witty prods on the diversity quotas and PC culture sprinkled about in some episodes. The chemistry between Kaleb and Jezza felt natural just like his days with Hammond and May. One of the things that cracked me up was Jezza's description of Twitter in episode 3. He nailed it with the accuracy.
 
"Twitter now is just an opportunity for very left wing people to express increasingly left wing views to other left wing people."

www.youtube.com

Jeremy Clarkson explains Twitter

JC knows. From Clarkson's Farm!
www.youtube.com www.youtube.com
For that accurate summary alone I feel the show was worth it.
 
Finished the show. I think it could have been used as a very good display of the dangers of the global trade (ironic considering it's made by Amazon) since the profit from farming is absolutely null because farmers need to compete against an enormous global market that can always cut on safety and quality. Not to mention that importing exotic foods like Avocado does more damage for the environment than driving cars for a year.
But besides having people actually think on what's happening and said, this is the cases that a modern show doesn't feel the need to pontificate those points to us, mostly because that's not something rich people want plebs to think about. Still a fun show just for the information and the hijinks involved.
 
Finished this show the other day, it was great. I hope there's a second season.

Looking for more farming content, I found this channel. Harry Metcalfe is a farmer, who is also a car reviewer, who also lives right next to Clarkson's farm. Strange how that worked out.

He goes a lot more into the technical details, as well as the financials, and it provides a very interesting (and sometimes depressing) view into the whole process.
 
The knuckle dragging ape got an award relating to the show, while it is 100% a calculated choice I do still support it. Even if I agree with those on social media saying Caleb should have got it instead.

farmweek.com

Clarkson named 2021 Farming Champion of the Year - FARM WEEK

BROADCASTER and farmer Jeremy Clarkson (pictured)has been named the NFU’s 2021 Farming Champion of the Year at the Farmers Weekly Awards for his work this year which has seen him champion British farming. His hit show Clarkson’s Farm has showcased the realities of farming on his farm in...
farmweek.com farmweek.com

BROADCASTER and farmer Jeremy Clarkson has been named the NFU’s 2021 Farming Champion of the Year at the Farmers Weekly Awards for his work this year which has seen him champion British farming.

His hit show Clarkson’s Farm has showcased the realities of farming on his farm in Oxfordshire to millions of viewers, who enjoy his outspoken views on farming and no-nonsense approach.

He has been a strong supporter of the NFU’s Back British Farming day and echoed its call for UK food self-sufficiency not to slip below 60 per cent – and went further, calling for Government to make 80 per cent self-sufficiency a target.

NFU President Minette Batters said: “When it comes to recognising someone who has done their best to showcase British food and farming over the past 12 months, no-one has earned this award more than Jeremy Clarkson.

“His show has really resonated with the public, brought alive the ups and downs of our industry to a huge new audience, and transported British farming into the living rooms of families across the country.

“It’s been such a challenging time for British farming over the past 12 months; as key workers our farmers have kept shelves stocked with British food and dealt with extreme weather events. Now they are battling labour shortages, supply chain disruption and rising costs, which are causing severe problems for essential food producing businesses.

“Through all of this, Jeremy Clarkson has been a vocal champion for the British farming industry. His enthusiasm comes through in spades and his overwhelming and continued support for the NFU’s Back British Farming campaign makes him a very deserving winner of this prestigious award.”
Click to expand...
 
It's out for the unaware.

Clarkson - He called his baby "foreign"
Kaleb - He was born in Oxford!
 
The UK government has declared war on farmers for quite some time now, as illustrated in Season 2 where Clarkson finds his cows are at risk of getting TB from an infestation of badgers in the area. If a cow catches TB, it has to be isolated and slaughtered and the farm basically placed under an interdict so it can't spread to humans. As numerous people explain on the show, this basically would run them out of business. So Clarkson demands to know how he can run the badgers off his land to protect his flock, and his farm manager and the local council reps explain (though they obviously don't care for the laws involved) that badgers are a "protected species" and that he could face jail time and large fines if he's caught killing badgers or digging up their dens. His farm manager basically says the laws are outdated and need to be changed, but what are you going to do?

I can't help but root for the guy, especially after he insulted St Meghan Markle in print, and then deliberately apologized only to her cuckold of a husband.
 
Commander X said:
The UK government has declared war on farmers for quite some time now, as illustrated in Season 2 where Clarkson finds his cows are at risk of getting TB from an infestation of badgers in the area. If a cow catches TB, it has to be isolated and slaughtered and the farm basically placed under an interdict so it can't spread to humans. As numerous people explain on the show, this basically would run them out of business. So Clarkson demands to know how he can run the badgers off his land to protect his flock, and his farm manager and the local council reps explain (though they obviously don't care for the laws involved) that badgers are a "protected species" and that he could face jail time and large fines if he's caught killing badgers or digging up their dens. His farm manager basically says the laws are outdated and need to be changed, but what are you going to do?

I can't help but root for the guy, especially after he insulted St Meghan Markle in print, and then deliberately apologized only to her cuckold of a husband.
Click to expand...
It's this kind of incompetence and lack of care that ultimately results in communities genociding the endangered animals while agreeing not to speak of it to anyone. Making the situation worse than no enforcement at all.
 
Glad that Clarkson's doing what he can to keep the farm going. Was going to make a point about how staying in the EU wouldn't have really made much of a difference in the long run as the EU has done nothing to prevent the French and Dutch govnt. from ruining its farming sectors for no discernable reason and would have done nothing to stop the UK govnt from doing the same thing, but this is a thread for talking about a farming show.

Glad he didn't apologize directly to Meghan, though. That fucking rat kike can stew eternally at the fact that she will never be the Queen of England.
 
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