Chris is going to Everfree Northwest - (Update July 31st: Chris is not going to Everfree Northwest)

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Optimus Prime said:
Who would go with him?

The problem here is that Chris is in one track mind mode. He wants to get to this convention, as brony conventions pretty much are the 'MHS reunions' he dreamed of and never got to attend (not like he wouldn't have been a social outcast at those anyway). The long list of reasons why Chris shouldn't go are already detailed enough, but Chris is honestly dangerous to himself in that he'll put himself in bad positions where he generally will not be able to function.

This is like his trip to Ohio, except far more demanding in a far shittier vehicle that possibly will not be able to even make it. And has he even been vaccinated? THAT could cause problems crossing state lines.
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He's already vaxxed https://sonichu.com/cwcki/COVID-19#Vaccination

Those Praetor people possibly? I'm sure there are enablers of his who're willing to that far to make his attendance a reality, its just a matter of time they'll reveal themselves.
 
You promise me the utter chaos and destruction of a Chris solo cross-country road trip, including a drive through the Rockies, and then suggest organizing a flight for him? The actual fuck, I thought I was soft.

Nigga can afford to make his own flight arrangements. Lego ain't essential. Furry cons aren't either. Chris will not fuck you. That's my advice to the community.
 
Radical Goodspeed said:
You promise me the utter chaos and destruction of a Chris solo cross-country road trip, including a drive through the Rockies, and then suggest organizing a flight for him? The actual fuck, I thought I was soft.

Nigga can afford to make his own flight arrangements. Lego ain't essential. Furry cons aren't either. Chris will not fuck you. That's my advice to the community.
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If someone actually accompanies Chris, I can't think of any reason except that it's just gonna be for the lulz. What risk/reward could be there other than just having something for christory?
 
mudwogg said:
If someone actually accompanies Chris, I can't think of any reason except that it's just gonna be for the lulz. What risk/reward could be there other than just having something for christory?
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Exactly. In this day and age, no one on the internet has any genuine intention when interacting with CWC. Anyone who's response to him isn't immediate revulsion is suspect. At best, I see "charitable" party thinking that a cross-country trip with CWC being an easy in to being some next Idea Guys. At worst, this is where CWC's story ends until he shows up on Forensic Files.

Some of us here have troll's remorse and thus there isn't any inherent malice there. I get it and I don't get it. Its not the first time since 2008 I've looked at another Christorian and asked why the fuck they feel the need to give him anything. Its still faggotry, but there's some sincerity at least if the intent is just to get him safely.
 
Like I don't get the appeal of accompanying Chris Chan anywhere. You wanna see what it's like, enroll in your local spastic buddy system thing and see how stressful and irritating it is to babysit a 26 year old spacker and prevent them from getting in a fist fight in Tesco over someone touching an item they wanted to put in their basket.
 
At this point if you plan on flying him to Seattle you would have to rent a private jet since TSA would probably assume Chris's stench is a gas attack on the airport.
 
Banana Puree said:
At this point if you plan on flying him to Seattle you would have to rent a private jet since TSA would probably assume Chris's stench is a gas attack on the airport.
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I mean, be serious, as if Chris would settle for anything less than a private jet or a VIP ticket.

mudwogg said:
He's already vaxxed https://sonichu.com/cwcki/COVID
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Oh god! First I read your comment as "He's already waxed"... And got an extremely horrifying mental image of a poor beauty salon employee and Chris..
 
Radical Goodspeed said:
You promise me the utter chaos and destruction of a Chris solo cross-country road trip, including a drive through the Rockies, and then suggest organizing a flight for him? The actual fuck, I thought I was soft.

Nigga can afford to make his own flight arrangements. Lego ain't essential. Furry cons aren't either. Chris will not fuck you. That's my advice to the community.
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He will attend, even if it means walk and hitch hike for days.
Banana Puree said:
At this point if you plan on flying him to Seattle you would have to rent a private jet since TSA would probably assume Chris's stench is a gas attack on the airport.
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Thermal cameras can detect farts. Imagine his B.O. gives a different temperature. I think this is where he get the aura came from.
 
Squidfucker said:
Actually Chris isn't an outcast everywhere, for some reason, he's got some random redditor retards defending him. I'm not even kidding.
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Probably because Chris trooned out since criticizing troons makes you a Suppressive Person.
 
JYBlowsIt said:
Probably because Chris trooned out since criticizing troons makes you a Suppressive Person.
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Reddit is tyranny sympathy site no.2, only beaten by twitter. I used to frequent that subreddit some times before I joined the farms, there was certainly a point in time where a majority of the people there recounted funny stories of him being trolled and updates about Chris making a fool of himself in whatever clique or phase he was going through.

However it's gradually sort of grown into a "fan" art and admirer subreddit from more of a hate watch one, with more Chris sympathetic posts and most people attempting to validate his current state of being, the original sorts of posts you used to see in that subreddit are long gone and are a minority, drowned out by the troons and other autistic spastics that for some strange reason, admire the dexterity in his relevance and his pioneering in OCs and early fandom creation.
 
mudwogg said:
Personally, I wish he'd go alone so that the chances of lulzy events (especially during the trip) happening increase.
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It's more likely we get no content if that happens. He just breaks down and there's no video or anything, he just has to come back home on a Greyhound or some shit.
 
Damn, I remember the last time Chris has intentions on going to Seattle is when he entered that PaRappa the Rapper contest expecting he would win. We all know how that turned out.
 
mudwogg said:
If someone actually accompanies Chris, I can't think of any reason except that it's just gonna be for the lulz. What risk/reward could be there other than just having something for christory?
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His orbiters don’t milk Chris for lulz, they enable him. They see him as a minor celebrity. The reason they hang with Chris is for clout to post on Reddit. If they get to be a part of Christory, even better.
 
Radical Goodspeed said:
You promise me the utter chaos and destruction of a Chris solo cross-country road trip, including a drive through the Rockies, and then suggest organizing a flight for him? The actual fuck, I thought I was soft.

Nigga can afford to make his own flight arrangements. Lego ain't essential. Furry cons aren't either. Chris will not fuck you. That's my advice to the community.
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Is Chris even allowed at furry cons? I read somewhere he was banned from several major ones "for his own safety"
 
mudwogg said:
If someone actually accompanies Chris, I can't think of any reason except that it's just gonna be for the lulz. What risk/reward could be there other than just having something for christory?
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Well I guess they could do it if they're both a white knight and they're brony, especially if they can somehow wrangle a a free trip to the brony convention out of this.

Although there's no way Chris would ever approve of giving anyone but him money but that's not to say whoever is doing this fundraiser (Null?) couldn't do it if they somehow could find someone fits that critera and is also trustworthy, assuming there is any money raised.

Null would probally be the most trustworthy out of the people still active that I know about but I'm not sure how much he'd actually enjoy attenting a Bronycon and having to babysit Chris at the same time.
 
Solar Eclipse Paradox said:
Damn, I remember the last time Chris has intentions on going to Seattle is when he entered that PaRappa the Rapper contest expecting he would win. We all know how that turned out.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=cEmM4JKZK8I
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Fuck I love everything surrounding that video, from how "TRUE AND HONEST" here made one-hundred-fucking-twenty dummy accounts to vote for himself (but couldn't spare some of that time learning the goddamn lyrics to make a slightly less embarrassing video) to how he told Megan that the Herculean "effort" of performing less than 3 minutes of mild geriatric aerobics made him contract "a gut virus" (of course, we all know he's talking about :briefs:).

There is even an early example of Chris trying to rewrite reality when he made a fake PlayStation website where he won the contest (GodBear knows how the fuck did he expect that to somehow work).

I'm also fond of the many instances where he mentions being autistic when posing as different people kissing his own ass, despite those personas purportedly not knowing Chris and his autism not being mentioned anywhere on the video. Of course, this is because of Chris being a goddamn ape that can't maintain a lie with a minimum of coherence, but I like to think of those imaginary people watching the video and just naturally understanding that superautism is the only logical explanation.
 
Get Frank Hassle to drive Chris-Chan to Seattle. Record the entire event and call it “The Adventures of Chriscilla, Queen of the Retards.”
 
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