UK British News Megathread - aka CWCissey's news thread

LXXVII Brigade · Mar 3, 2026

Heinrich Maneuver said:
the solution is 'drill the north sea'

That would be funny purely to see the SNP try and endure the double think of more jobs in Scotland and "an independent Scotland based on oil and gas like Norway" and "we must protect the environment at all costs, wind is the way forwards". 100% if the UK government starts to invest more in the North Sea, the SNP will make themselves look retarded by sitting on the fence and appealing to both sides of it's voter base.

"First Minister what is your response to the UK Government's investment into offshore oil and gas in the North Sea?"

"I think it's a backwards move that will harm our already fragile and vulnerable planet and only aid in driving the current Climate Crisis"

"So you would place a priority on protecting the environment at the cost of the hundreds of jobs this could generate for the North East of Scotland?"

"well obviously I agree that creating new jobs is important but also the environment is important, offshore wind is obviously the way to go even though it's a massive cluster fuck and non viable economically"

Isn't being a populist party a bitch Johnnie Boy?

Kofi Drinka · Mar 3, 2026

Chunky Salsa said:
Americans seem to have a weird obsession with trying to act superior to Europoors. No clue why. It's like jersh with his 'man Britain sucks' and then just stating that his life is miserable and he's powerless. It feels just weird.
Britain does suck though lmao.

Just remind them that every yankette gets wet as a kipper for an English accent. Must be because we don't have to take out a 7 figure loan to go to the dentist and have foreskins.

Clem Fandango · Mar 3, 2026

Chunky Salsa said:
Americans seem to have a weird obsession with trying to act superior to Europoors. No clue why. It's like jersh with his 'man Britain sucks' and then just stating that his life is miserable and he's powerless. It feels just weird.
Britain does suck though lmao.

Yeah, I listen to pretty much every MATI and tbh I don't really disagree with Josh how much the UK sucks - it demonstrably does. It's just a bit odd that he goes on about it as much as he does.

I mean, fair enough to complain when you're getting snooty emails from OFCOM, but he started years before that.

BongoMongo · Mar 3, 2026

Kofi Drinka said:
Just remind them that every yankette gets wet as a kipper for an English accent. Must be because we don't have to take out a 7 figure loan to go to the dentist and have foreskins.

Dude that is such a fucking cope. USA dentistry is far better.

Stop being one of those butbutbut Ouah ennaaayyhhhhessss bitches.

Edited to say: NHS dental care really doesn't exist for most people. Private dentistry is heavily in need of regulation and control,and most see it as a way to print money. Finding a good, affordable private dentist is incredibly hard. We're all compelled to pay for NHS dentistry but very few people benefit from it.

At least in the USA their system of Medicaid allows poor people to access dental care. In the UK, at best, emergency dental care is,here's some ABX, we'll pull it out in a weeks time.

British teeth are known for being shit, because they are. Successive governments have ignored the issue, or in the case of the lpt, actively made it worse by introducing UDA as a metric of payment, which they were told,at the time, would push dentists away from providing NHS care. 20 years on, here we are,and they were right.

Kofi Drinka · Mar 3, 2026

BongoMongo said:
Dude that is such a fucking cope. USA dentistry is far better.

Stop being one of those butbutbut Ouah ennaaayyhhhhessss bitches.

Pushed a button did I Tyrone?

Null is part of the gay political sperging terminally online podcast sphere. I wouldn't take his opinion on the UK seriously. Years back the Jewish propaganda did everything they could to make "the anglos" the bad guy and all the bri'ish shit. Obvious subversion to turn Europeans against each other and distract from the real problem ethnic groups. Laugh and pity them, were it so easy to live as a retard and not be aware of your own subversion.

Chunky Salsa · Mar 3, 2026

Clem Fandango said:
I mean, fair enough to complain when you're getting snooty emails from OFCOM, but he started years before that.

Maybe that's his real autistic hyperfixation.

BongoMongo said:
: NHS dental care really doesn't exist for most people. Private dentistry is heavily in need of regulation and control,and most see it as a way to print money. Finding a good, affordable private dentist is incredibly hard. We're all compelled to pay for NHS dentistry but very few people benefit from it.

I unironically drive four hours every now and again to visit my NHS dentist and make sure I'm still with them, because you literally cannot get on the register where I am currently. It's lunacy.

Kofi Drinka · Mar 3, 2026

BongoMongo said:
British teeth are known for being shit, because they are. Successive governments have ignored the issue, or in the case of the lpt, actively made it worse by introducing UDA as a metric of payment, which they were told,at the time, would push dentists away from providing NHS care. 20 years on, here we are,and they were right.

That's an American meme and it comes from the lack of cosmetic. The UK has the same level of teeth issues as the US does according to studies. The only difference is we don't whiten ours as much as the yanks do. We don't go for the fake hollywood look and that's basically the only difference.

I can get into a NHS dentist easy. I just hop on the Euro tunnel. Put a bit of shoe polish on and get the first boat over. I'm front of the queue within an hour. As long as you have a warm coat and some mittens it's piss easy.

BongoMongo · Mar 3, 2026

Kofi Drinka said:
That's an American meme and it comes from the lack of cosmetic. The UK has the same level of teeth issues as the US does according to studies. The only difference is we don't whiten ours as much as the yanks do. We don't go for the fake hollywood look and that's basically the only difference.

I can get into a NHS dentist easy. I just hop on the Euro tunnel. Put a bit of shoe polish on and get the first boat over. I'm front of the queue within an hour. As long as you have a warm coat and some mittens it's piss easy.

This whole insinuating everyone who disagrees with you black is insanely tiresome.

And that provision for boat scum is actually private dental care. They're paying for them to go to private dentists, in taxis, with their interpreters.

Given poor dental cares ramifications for overall health and the resulting spend we have to make, it's not a joke. It causes older people to be sicker,which costs everyone more money. Arthritis, heart disease, diabetes, vascular dementia are just some of the issues it actively causes.

So,no, I don't think it's funny. I am insanely privileged to have an excellent dentist and the means to fund it, and in a decent country that access to care shouldn't be limited to those with the fiscal means or the ability to self advocate.

At least in the USA theres a cohesive provision for poor people to access dental care. In this country? Last year we turned down nigh on 200 people for the armed forces because of the state of their teeth. The consequences are massive and we all pay for it,one way or the other, and it was all so fucking avoidable in the first place.

Heinrich Maneuver · Mar 3, 2026

Armed standoff in Alum Rock Birmingham, at a primary school. Going to get home as quick as I can lol and will get archives

Duane Dibbley · Mar 3, 2026

Kofi Drinka said:
The only difference is we don't whiten ours as much as the yanks do. We don't go for the fake hollywood look and that's basically the only difference.

It's happening a lot, lot more. The yewf at work are all Turkey-teef'd. Braces, whitening, no problem. Flying abroad for cosmetic surgery so Jan in accounting thinks you're more attractive? Consumerism levels of retarded.

As for jersh and the yankoids, they're just bitter that they can't claim moral superiority when the guy they tied their flag to and promise no pedos and no wars, is supporting both.
Couple that "lol, europe wouldn't exist without american army" followed by "waahhh why won't europe help us in Iran?" has broken their minds.
Plus, trump called europe and UK armed forces shite and cowards on the front lines, so they can bollocks.

I hope Keir continues to tell them to fight their own wars. It will be fun to watch them cock this one up without having the scapegoat of "muh yurup".

Kofi Drinka · Mar 3, 2026

According to the mirror 2 stabbing victims. One is a man in serious condition and ones a woman who isn't. They have a 32 year old man in custody but there seems to still be a stand off?

Heinrich Maneuver · Mar 3, 2026

BBC

A man has been stabbed and a woman also injured in an attack near a primary school.
Emergency services, including firearms officers, were called to Bridge Road, in Alum Rock, Birmingham, shortly after 12:00 GMT following reports a man had been seriously injured.
A 32-year-old man has been arrested in connection with the stabbing and remains in police custody.
West Midlands Police said the woman's injuries were not life-threatening, adding that it was a contained incident and officers were reviewing CCTV footage in the area.

"We understand how deeply distressing and concerning this incident is and we will have extra officers in the area to offer reassurance to the community," Det Supt James Munro said.
West Midlands Ambulance Service said it responded to reports of a stabbing after receiving multiple 999 calls.
"Crews arrived to find a man with serious injuries and administered advanced life support on scene," a spokesperson said.
"A second patient, a woman, was treated for less serious injuries."

Couple videos doing the rounds on twitter (archive of tweet that confirm 2 dead). Officer giving CPR to someone. Alleged video 'everyone on my snap just witnessed a body get caught live'. Guy saying it was a black guy who stabbed an Afghan to death.
Alum Rock is like, 6% white, if that. There's multiple supposed photos of graffiti in Alum that says 'no whites after 8pm'

Eekum Bokum · Mar 3, 2026

Clem Fandango said:
I've been to Scotland, once.
I remember it much as one recalls a dream, or a nightmare. I was on a budget flight to Norway when a storm forced us to ditch in Glasgow Prestwick.

The cabin crew suggested we all go out and club it. I had no option. I figured it'd be safer on the streets.

I saw the Scotch in their natural habitat -
and it weren't pretty. I'd seen them in stations before, being loud, but now I was surrounded.

It felt like they were watching me. Fish-white flesh puckered by the highland breeze. Tight eyes peering out. Screechy booze-soaked voices hollering for a taxi to take 'em to the next pub.

A shatter of glass. A round of applause. A 16-year-old mother of three vomiting in a sewer, bairns looking on, chewing on potato cakes.

I ain't never goin' back. Not never.

God-damned evil misty jocks.

>IMPLYING · Mar 3, 2026

The Ghost of Sergei Witte said:
Only thing I'm shocked by are the (minority of ) Americans celebrating this. I don't think I'm retarded enough to understand the cognitive dissonance of "I love killing browns, it feels good to be White, FUCKING DIE EUROPOOR SCUM"

Spite-based nationalism, or using your nation/race/culture as a substitute for self-worth because you see yourself as having none.
I've seen the term "Low-IQ antisemitism" thrown out there describing people who refuse to use common sense when it comes to Jews, or are so performative when it comes to such they'll just look retarded and make contradictory statements.

In that vein I'd argue there's a "Low-IQ nationalism." It's people who could effectively be called "tourists" when it comes to some hobby or franchise. They know the bare essentials, possibly have a pop-history-tier knowledge of their own country's history and culture, and scream platitudes based on an extremely narrow view of the thing they claim is important to them. There's overlap in the extent of these people's knowledge of their country and the people who hate their country—incomplete, vague, cherry-picked, and lacking nuance.

Some of them are also slave moralists, which I think includes the Groyper-likes (nebulous ethnicities of said people aside). Basically they resent [X], and so the opposite of [X] is therefore good. This can compound over time. An eye-rolling annoyance about [X] might gradually evolve into a seething, murderous hatred of [X] because they let their hate live rent-free in their heads. This is even though such intense hate doesn't achieve anything.
Resent [Israel], so [Palestine] good.
Resent [Jews], so [Muslims] good.
Resent [Non-whites], so [Whites] good.
Resent [Euros], so [non-Euros] good.
It also includes negative actions against said groups being received well depending on varying intensities of resentment, possibly becoming a personal hatred.
Resent [Euros], so [Dead Euros] good.

Hate is too intense an emotion to waste on something you can't address, and if your hate is just culminating in voting for a particular party at the ballot box, or impotently posting online, then it's just a waste of time and such emotional investment.

TLDR: Casual nationalists (nation/race) who let their seethe live rent free in their heads.
This can apply to anyone. A simple fix is some humility and accepting it's possible your picture of something might be incomplete, and that resentment doesn't substitute action or delegitimise facts. It's also a waste of time to seethe before you can do anything about it.

Tom Nook's Gloryhole · Mar 3, 2026

Kofi Drinka said:
Had recycling been accepted? I think most people just chuck all the plastic and card in 1 bin and everything else in the other. No one reads if it can be recycled or not. It's just thrown in that bin because it's the only way to manage the stupid bin collection time table now.

The real British horror story is the realisation that you've forgotten to take your bins out and now you've got to wait another fortnight (or longer in some areas) for the bins to be collected again. Meanwhile, the bin is full to the brim so the next 3 months is spent slowly trying to add a bin bag from the backlog into the bin and actively managing what you throw out. If the council decides to change the day of bin deliveries on a whim? Too bad retard, you're now going to spend an unreasonable amount of time unfucking the mess.

To top it off, I know of areas that still have the fucking open top recycling bins which basically blow everything all over the streets if you leave it out the night before.

LXXVII Brigade · Mar 3, 2026

Tom Nook's Gloryhole said:
The real British horror story is the realisation that you've forgotten to take your bins out and now you've got to wait another fortnight (or longer in some areas) for the bins to be collected again. Meanwhile, the bin is full to the brim so the next 3 months is spent slowly trying to add a bin bag from the backlog into the bin and actively managing what you throw out. If the council decides to change the day of bin deliveries on a whim? Too bad retard, you're now going to spend an unreasonable amount of time unfucking the mess.

To top it off, I know of areas that still have the fucking open top recycling bins which basically blow everything all over the streets if you leave it out the night before.

Don't forget absolutely mental opening and closing times for your local dump which make if impossible to get into without taking a day off work.

Overly Serious · Mar 3, 2026

Kofi Drinka said:
That's an American meme and it comes from the lack of cosmetic. The UK has the same level of teeth issues as the US does according to studies. The only difference is we don't whiten ours as much as the yanks do. We don't go for the fake hollywood look and that's basically the only difference.

And as much from the fact that they slam any child into braces as soon as possible regardless of need. I suspect because of the privatised healthcare, but whatever.

The memes are mostly just memes. Like the way they love to mock the French for surrendering, which really became a big thing when the French opposed the US's invasion of Iraq. And you know, for losing a million people in the world wars rather than showing up two thirds of the way through having bank rolled the Nazis in the first place.

Tom Nook's Gloryhole said:
The real British horror story is the realisation that you've forgotten to take your bins out and now you've got to wait another fortnight (or longer in some areas) for the bins to be collected again. Meanwhile, the bin is full to the brim so the next 3 months is spent slowly trying to add a bin bag from the backlog into the bin and actively managing what you throw out. If the council decides to change the day of bin deliveries on a whim? Too bad retard, you're now going to spend an unreasonable amount of time unfucking the mess.

To top it off, I know of areas that still have the fucking open top recycling bins which basically blow everything all over the streets if you leave it out the night before.

Don't forget when your neighbour runs out of space in his own bin and tries to sneak it into yours and you have to go round there holding his bin bag and say "this yours mate?"

I've done that before.

I wouldn't mind if asked and I had space, but not them doing it mid-week just because I haven't put my own rubbish in it yet. And for Fuck's sake, if you're going to try something cheeky like that, wouldn't you at least not take it further away rather than try it on with the guy right next door that you're on a first name basis with?

Heinrich Maneuver · Mar 3, 2026

The govt has finally arranged a charter flight for Brits who have registered with the Home Office via Oman 'in the coming days'.
It's worth pointing out that those who have immigrated to Dubai/the UAE and are seeking shelter back here are likely only doing so temporarily and will be heading back as soon as they can/its safe(r). I bet the majority of people looking to flee the region are tourists or those who do seasonal work and live half here and half over there.
No further news on Alum Rock. Even people I've asked here don't know whats fully gone down.

The Ghost of Sergei Witte · Mar 3, 2026

I'm starting to worry that I'm enjoying these thumbnails a bit too much I think

Otterly · Mar 3, 2026

Overly Serious said:
wouldn't mind if asked and I had space, but not them doing it mid-week just because I haven't put my own rubbish in it yet. And for Fuck's sake, if you're going to try something cheeky like that, wouldn't you at least not take it further away rather than try it on with the guy right next door that you're on a first name basis with?

It does show a certain lack of theory of mind. You could always take up learning the bagpipes as revenge

UK British News Megathread - aka CWCissey's news thread

LXXVII Brigade

中国第一。打倒西方帝国主义。

Kofi Drinka

Clem Fandango

Can you hear me?

BongoMongo

Kofi Drinka

Chunky Salsa

Kofi Drinka

BongoMongo

Heinrich Maneuver

it's just you, me and this wire

Duane Dibbley

Kofi Drinka

Heinrich Maneuver

it's just you, me and this wire

Eekum Bokum

Eekum Bokum

>IMPLYING

Tom Nook's Gloryhole

LXXVII Brigade

中国第一。打倒西方帝国主义。

Overly Serious

Heinrich Maneuver

it's just you, me and this wire

The Ghost of Sergei Witte

Otterly

Immerse your soul in love