UK British News Megathread - aka CWCissey's news thread

https://news.sky.com/story/row-over-new-greggs-vegan-sausage-rolls-heats-up-11597679 (https://archive.ph/5Ba6o)

A heated row has broken out over a move by Britain's largest bakery chain to launch a vegan sausage roll.

The pastry, which is filled with a meat substitute and encased in 96 pastry layers, is available in 950 Greggs stores across the country.

It was promised after 20,000 people signed a petition calling for the snack to be launched to accommodate plant-based diet eaters.


But the vegan sausage roll's launch has been greeted by a mixed reaction: Some consumers welcomed it, while others voiced their objections.

View image on Twitter


spread happiness@p4leandp1nk
https://twitter.com/p4leandp1nk/status/1080767496569974785

#VEGANsausageroll thanks Greggs

7
10:07 AM - Jan 3, 2019
See spread happiness's other Tweets
Twitter Ads info and privacy


Cook and food poverty campaigner Jack Monroe declared she was "frantically googling to see what time my nearest opens tomorrow morning because I will be outside".

While TV writer Brydie Lee-Kennedy called herself "very pro the Greggs vegan sausage roll because anything that wrenches veganism back from the 'clean eating' wellness folk is a good thing".

One Twitter user wrote that finding vegan sausage rolls missing from a store in Corby had "ruined my morning".

Another said: "My son is allergic to dairy products which means I can't really go to Greggs when he's with me. Now I can. Thank you vegans."

View image on Twitter


pg often@pgofton
https://twitter.com/pgofton/status/1080772793774624768

The hype got me like #Greggs #Veganuary

42
10:28 AM - Jan 3, 2019
See pg often's other Tweets
Twitter Ads info and privacy


TV presenter Piers Morgan led the charge of those outraged by the new roll.

"Nobody was waiting for a vegan bloody sausage, you PC-ravaged clowns," he wrote on Twitter.

Mr Morgan later complained at receiving "howling abuse from vegans", adding: "I get it, you're all hangry. I would be too if I only ate plants and gruel."

Another Twitter user said: "I really struggle to believe that 20,000 vegans are that desperate to eat in a Greggs."

"You don't paint a mustach (sic) on the Mona Lisa and you don't mess with the perfect sausage roll," one quipped.

Journalist Nooruddean Choudry suggested Greggs introduce a halal steak bake to "crank the fume levels right up to 11".

The bakery chain told concerned customers that "change is good" and that there would "always be a classic sausage roll".

It comes on the same day McDonald's launched its first vegetarian "Happy Meal", designed for children.

The new dish comes with a "veggie wrap", instead of the usual chicken or beef option.

It should be noted that Piers Morgan and Greggs share the same PR firm, so I'm thinking this is some serious faux outrage and South Park KKK gambiting here.

 

[Kofi Drinka]

Mixed race hands typed this.

Nice for you to finally admit you're mixed race there. Should screenshot it and have it added to the OP.

 

[Otterly]

Any kind of glowie on here is probably part of an underfunded team set up as some politically connected cunts pet project.

I wonder which site is the punishment assignment? At least here is funny and even mumsnet has its moments. Imagine coming in on a Monday and it’s all, ‘right Liam, you’re monitoring MLPfetish.com’ ‘but sarge I did that last week! Why can’t Brian do it, he’s into ponies!’
They must see some stuff. I hope we give them a chuckle sometimes

 

[Cloaca Rimjob]

Mixed race hands typed this.

Did I not out you before joking about count dankula's kids being molested and thinking its funny?

 

[FedPostalService]

Did I not out you before joking about count dankula's kids being molested and thinking its funny?

I want Dankula broke, dead, his kids raped and brain washed and I think it's lulz. Welcome to the Internet, you autistic half breed. This is what it was like before everyone pretended to be autistic.

I joked about it then, I'll joke about it now, and I'll joke about it in the future.

I may be a nihilistic arsehole right now, but in the morning you will still be a mongrel.

 

[Mr Bunny]

Give this man a British passport. He truly is one of us.

N

 

[teriyakiburns]

Why can’t Brian do it, he’s into ponies!’

Brian's too busy infiltrating homeland:

 

[Cloaca Rimjob]

I want Dankula broke, dead, his kids raped and brain washed and I think it's lulz. Welcome to the Internet, you autistic half breed. This is what it was like before everyone pretended to be autistic.

I joked about it then, I'll joke about it now, and I'll joke about it in the future.

I may be a nihilistic arsehole right now, but in the morning you will still be a mongrel.

you felt bad typing that didn't you? lmao just to prove a point. I can feel the venom through every word but end of day you're still laughing about the sexual exploitation of children. you love posting in the bodybuilding forum, probably gay yes I'm a mongrel lmao there may be some Viking DNA that's against joking about fucking kids, lets check your hard drive Raoul Moat

 

[FedPostalService]

you felt bad typing that didn't you? lmao just to prove a point. I can feel the venom through every word but end of day you're still laughing about the sexual exploitation of children. you love posting in the bodybuilding forum, probably gay yes I'm a mongrel lmao there may be some Viking DNA that's against joking about fucking kids, lets check your hard drive Raoul Moat

It's not your fault your dad used you as a flesh light. It's not my fault either. It is not the fault of anyone else in this thread.

I would say I hope you find peace, but that's a lie. I find your pain amusing. Now, can we stop shitting up the holy Greggs thread?

 

[teriyakiburns]

Calm down, lads. Have a sausage roll.

 

[Cloaca Rimjob]

It's not your fault your dad used you as a flesh light. It's not my fault either. It is not the fault of anyone else in this thread.

I would say I hope you find peace, but that's a lie. I find your pain amusing. Now, can we stop shitting up the holy Greggs thread?

Flesh lights are an American thing, nobody here would even know what they are. Paedo tries to deflect haha KYS

 

[FedPostalService]

Fleshlights are an american thing, nobody here would even know what they are. Paedo tries to deflect haha l

Wait, you know what they are? Ignore button is getting hit before the mods have to put on their programmer's socks and ban us both..

 

[Geoff Capes Vapes Apes]

Behave yourselves, or I'll bang your heads together

 

[Cloaca Rimjob]

Wait, you know what they are? Ignore button is getting hit before the mods have to put on their programmer's socks and ban us both..

I WON!

 

[UselessRubberKeyboard]

Behave yourselves, or I'll bang your heads together

YES MUM

 

[The Green Man]

I for one hate danuka and think he's a cuck.

 

[Morethanabitfoolish]

This thread needs a keel hauling.

Turns out West Midlands police used AI to justify the Tel-Aviv away fans ban despite denying doing so and it made stuff up. Everyone look surprised .

 

[Kofi Drinka]

This thread needs a keel hauling.

Turns out West Midlands police used AI to justify the Tel-Aviv away fans ban despite denying doing so and it made stuff up. Everyone look surprised .

How do you use AI to decide who can and can't attend a football game? What exactly is it doing and why is it doing it? We know it doesn't detect actual terrorists because none of the major events have been prevented by it. It's like Minority report but you have to guess the criminals name through Wordle.

 

[femboy fart huffer]

I fucking love watching gov sponsored agitprop backfire completely and utterly, they're just so bad at it.

Scot pilgrim if it was good. You can't tell me she isn't at least somewhat ramonacoded.

So, Southern Water have done goofed, hard, and thousands of people in Kent and Sussex have been without water for days.

So you mean the country's most dedicated gooner Steven Dawson is not able to shower? Fucking hell. I hope the babe station babes are armed and have some clothes pegs to put on their nose, guess that's a secondary use of nipple clamps at least? If those smell any better.

you’ve got to turn up and shame some fuckers for it. In person.

I would but every time I try I just end up muttering and crying.

Unless you say your name, you could realistically plot an actual terror attack on here and the police would never know unless someone reported you.

I'm not taking opsec advice from someone with a fucking photo of him as a profile picture. You're not fooling me mr 004(ft tall).

Do they pay for information? Hypothetically I mean.

Last time there was a big grass line was covid. That line was flooded with gay porn. The police are always pushing for more diversity including sexual orientation diversity. I think maybe money isn't needed.

I agree there is nothing more satisfying than killing and skinning a rabbit and making it into a stew. I have not butchered a deer yet, but I have always wanted to.

I don't really want to kill a deer. However I have seen muntjak deer before and I felt what I can only describe as a godly possession compelling me to fucking bludgeon that demon to death with whatever is closest to me. Fucking asian deer not only slit eye eyes but slit eye noses too. Absolutely abhorrent creatures. I would rather live in a wasp dense area than a muntjak deer dense area. Normally I am kinda hippiefag all animals are good even the ones I hate, but I feel a genuine compulsion to purge those demons that I can only liken to 40k in it's intensity.

They must see some stuff. I hope we give them a chuckle sometimes

I can't find the screenshot of it but there was an article a while ago about how those sorts of police end up agreeing with the shit they read. Hopefully they get a laugh and a bit extra.

 

[Morethanabitfoolish]

How do you use AI to decide who can and can't attend a football game? What exactly is it doing and why is it doing it? We know it doesn't detect actual terrorists because none of the major events have been prevented by it. It's like Minority report but you have to guess the criminals name through Wordle.

The incredibly TLDR is they looked up the fans they wanted to ban, found AI generated claims and said, "those must be real!" Hence their justification referring to a match that did not happen and numbers that are supported by no evidence.

It's slightly more dignified than sourcing their evidence from Reddit.

 

[Duane Dibbley]

I've been trying to find raw numbers of British citizen population change over the years, without migration. It is very, very difficult to find numbers and Google AI outright refuses to give me a graph or figures for just British changes.

The best I could find was 4.9 million net migration up to 2023, with 2.5 million british citizens leaving up to 2025 and anywhere from 30% to 50% of all children born to non-uk born parents and 70%-80% of population growth driven by immigration. (the range of figures were found on Gov websites and ONS website)

If anyone can assist with solid numbers, that would be great.

Anyway, the closest I could find it this graph:

Natural change is change not including migration so, to me, that means British citizens. What caused the change in 2020 - 2022? Considering people were locked inside, one would have assumed more people would be fornicating and reproducing...
Beyond Covid, here is a graph from a Gov website showing replacement theory in real time. Taking a wild guess, it seems that these numbers are massaged to be more viewer friendly, however anyone with eyes can see that migration will be more than "around 300k" a year.

I would like to see Reforms personal projections of population growth and the population mix of the UK from 2029 - 2033, assuming they win the election in 2029.
Would they agree with the ONS?