UK British News Megathread - aka CWCissey's news thread

https://news.sky.com/story/row-over-new-greggs-vegan-sausage-rolls-heats-up-11597679 (https://archive.ph/5Ba6o)

A heated row has broken out over a move by Britain's largest bakery chain to launch a vegan sausage roll.

The pastry, which is filled with a meat substitute and encased in 96 pastry layers, is available in 950 Greggs stores across the country.

It was promised after 20,000 people signed a petition calling for the snack to be launched to accommodate plant-based diet eaters.


But the vegan sausage roll's launch has been greeted by a mixed reaction: Some consumers welcomed it, while others voiced their objections.

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spread happiness@p4leandp1nk
https://twitter.com/p4leandp1nk/status/1080767496569974785

#VEGANsausageroll thanks Greggs

7
10:07 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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Cook and food poverty campaigner Jack Monroe declared she was "frantically googling to see what time my nearest opens tomorrow morning because I will be outside".

While TV writer Brydie Lee-Kennedy called herself "very pro the Greggs vegan sausage roll because anything that wrenches veganism back from the 'clean eating' wellness folk is a good thing".

One Twitter user wrote that finding vegan sausage rolls missing from a store in Corby had "ruined my morning".

Another said: "My son is allergic to dairy products which means I can't really go to Greggs when he's with me. Now I can. Thank you vegans."

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pg often@pgofton
https://twitter.com/pgofton/status/1080772793774624768

The hype got me like #Greggs #Veganuary

42
10:28 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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TV presenter Piers Morgan led the charge of those outraged by the new roll.

"Nobody was waiting for a vegan bloody sausage, you PC-ravaged clowns," he wrote on Twitter.

Mr Morgan later complained at receiving "howling abuse from vegans", adding: "I get it, you're all hangry. I would be too if I only ate plants and gruel."

Another Twitter user said: "I really struggle to believe that 20,000 vegans are that desperate to eat in a Greggs."

"You don't paint a mustach (sic) on the Mona Lisa and you don't mess with the perfect sausage roll," one quipped.

Journalist Nooruddean Choudry suggested Greggs introduce a halal steak bake to "crank the fume levels right up to 11".

The bakery chain told concerned customers that "change is good" and that there would "always be a classic sausage roll".

It comes on the same day McDonald's launched its first vegetarian "Happy Meal", designed for children.

The new dish comes with a "veggie wrap", instead of the usual chicken or beef option.

It should be noted that Piers Morgan and Greggs share the same PR firm, so I'm thinking this is some serious faux outrage and South Park KKK gambiting here.

 

[Kofi Drinka]

It’ll be the eco settings. You have to find how to turn them off. All the new washers have this bizarre water and power savings baked in, and that means they use more agitation and less water and that will wreck your clothes. But there is always a way of turning it off.

They also have eco systems that make your washing take 4 hours instead of 2. It's bloody annoying.

My mates were saying how the party was ridiculous. I love it. I hope they get their branding and platform together (as horrific as it will be) and get young people on side. Why?

It won't go any where. It's a labour protest vote at best.

 

[EddyRooney]

There are many things I dislike Rumsfeld for but this I always felt was bizarre because it’s a good concept in risk and it makes perfect sense

The concept of Black Swans ( unknown unknowns ) are comprehensively considered in the below book. It is a humorous yet detailed read I'd recommend. It considers many misconceptions regarding how people view the probability of events occurring and does a fair amount of trashing economic and financial risk experts - especially the academics ( so I'm sure a few other members here would enjoy it too ).

An always empty bedroom....

Another future professional footballing architect who would have won us Olympic Gold and then been an astronaut. Why is it always the high achievers ?

 

[Hey Johnny Bravo]

It’ll be the eco settings. You have to find how to turn them off. All the new washers have this bizarre water and power savings baked in, and that means they use more agitation and less water and that will wreck your clothes. But there is always a way of turning it off.

They also have eco systems that make your washing take 4 hours instead of 2. It's bloody annoying.

We also have this bullshit in the US where our self-declared betters don't want us to waste water. Take fewer showers, don't water your grass, let these shitty brand new appliances wreck your clothes, don't you dare have a koi pond in your backyard. Meanwhile these fucking assholes and their estates use more water in an hour than I could use in a week if I left the garden hose on full blast 24 hours a day. I do not understand why water is such a pricey commodity in developed countries.

 

[Tom Nook's Gloryhole]

You think washing machines are bad? I got myself a dishwasher for the first time because I've grown sick of handwashing everything. I used to use industrial dishwashers back when I was a nipper and they'd take 2 minutes max to blast a full tray of plates so they came out squeaky clean. So I'm thinking to myself "This is smaller so I'm guessing it'll take like 10-15 mins tops, right?"

Wrong.

Three fucking hours to do a dishwasher cycle.

So guess who has gone back to handwashing because it takes mere minutes to clean the plates and left the dishwasher to gather dust.

 

[femboy fart huffer]

It’ll be the eco settings. You have to find how to turn them off. All the new washers have this bizarre water and power savings baked in, and that means they use more agitation and less water and that will wreck your clothes. But there is always a way of turning it off.

Man idk how but I swear I just have the ability to derail a thread. Third time in as many days that something I've said has ended up in half the thread talking about it. But no. Trust me. I have tried everything short of violence and waterboarding, this dumb machine does not comply. It's not an eco setting, it's a smart load detector. You know I was going to joke about derailing a thread talking about sweaty fanny again but decided not to. Anyway yea my smart load detector. It's not using less water, it's not using less power, it's scaling the cycle up to what it believes I have put in. As I say the thing works and that's the worst part. It recommends me to put 5kg in for 2 hours or whatever, if I put in 7kg it will add an extra half hour or something like that. It's one of those things that's incredibly fucking annoying but only in communication not execution. It does it's job and it does it well, it just doesn't fucking tell me how long that job will take. You'd think that after a decade of owning the thing I would have learnt to put the washing in a full day before going on holiday instead of a few hours before. Country's got so bad, everyone's being forced into using a vpn and encrypting their lives that even my fucking washing machine's encrypted it's cycle lengths.

So guess who has gone back to handwashing because it takes mere minutes to clean the plates and left the dishwasher to gather dust.

When I go to someone's house and see they have a dishwasher I make a mental note of them incase I ever need gullible victims to scam. If my old arthritic grandma could do the dishes there is no reason you cannot either. I just genuinely think that people don't understand how to do the dishes. I see a dishwasher I assume they don't know to leave certain things to soak or don't know when a scourer needs replacing or some basic shit like that.

 

[Hey Johnny Bravo]

Three fucking hours to do a dishwasher cycle.

My dishwasher takes about 2 hours to complete a heavy cycle. Three hours is ridiculous. I know there are eco settings on some newer models but is this shit standard in the UK?

 

[Amin Yasister]

When I go to someone's house and see they have a dishwasher I make a mental note of them incase I ever need gullible victims to scam. If my old arthritic grandma could do the dishes there is no reason you cannot either. I just genuinely think that people don't understand how to do the dishes. I see a dishwasher I assume they don't know to leave certain things to soak or don't know when a scourer needs replacing or some basic shit like that.

I am in the process of remodelling my kitchen. Every tradesperson whom has visited to quote has asked where I am putting the dishwasher. Thet seem amazed when I say I don't want or need one.

Only my missus and I here, and we would much rather wash dishes by hand and have a beer/wine fridge in the space of a dishwasher. Much more useful for us both.

 

[Overly Serious]

If you live alone, I say just wash things by hand. It takes about the same amount of time you'd spend loading and unloading the dishwasher. If you live with a partner, honestly, I don't think that changes - it's the same amount of cooking utensils and pans and one extra plate and knife and fork. And if you have kids, well make the kids wash up.

A washing machine - that's a very valuable appliance. You want that. A fridge is useful because you have to go shopping much less often and how many houses have a pantry these days anyway? But dishwashers? It's a stretch, imo. Though for some particular circumstances it would be useful. Nice if you have a lot of dinner parties, I guess.

EDIT:

I am in the process of remodelling my kitchen. Every tradesperson whom has visited to quote has asked where I am putting the dishwasher. Thet seem amazed when I say I don't want or need one.

You could always get the plumbing put in for one anyway in case you sell the house or Starmer ends up requiring you to house migrants. And in the meantime just use the unit space for the wine / beer fridge or whatever you want in front of it.

 

[>IMPLYING]

Normies have immediately shot a request to repeal act to 98k signatures in less than a day.


A lot of the signatures are concentrated in city areas (Labour hubs) but the spread seems relatively even.
Labour could get an easy win by repealing it and they can easily offload the blame for the act on the Conservatives anyway.

 

[femboy fart huffer]

Thet seem amazed when I say I don't want or need one.

You mean they seem upset when they can't wring as much money out of you as possible. It's either terminal laziness or adhd tiktok zoomer brain rot cannot appreciate the almost meditative act of washing the dishes because it means taking a minor break from the constant stimulation. I mean especially nowadays it's just so much easier to do it all in one go. You put the hot water tap on and let the sink fill as you're putting dinner in the oven or whatever which is normally roughly about as long as it takes for the sink to fill, then the time it takes to cook is normally about the exact time it takes to wash all the dishes.

I just don't get the existence of dishwashers. I don't trust them. When I wash the dishes I can both see and also feel them getting clean. I know when it's clean just by feel and sight. A dishwasher basically just throws them in a puddle alongside a vibrator and hopes that it works. If a dishwasher was a miniature version of a carwash then I would maybe consider it. But why would I ever swap something that takes only the exact amount of time I need with something that just throws everything in for the same time, regardless of if it's just a glass I drank water from or a saucepan that's got shit crusted on it.

Also they're fucking expensive. Dishwasher capsules or whatever are the kitchen's answer to printer ink. When my grandad had moderate dementia he had this constant paranoia that when people would come to the house that they would be stealing the little capsule things. He ended up hiding them everywhere so that people didn't steal them. And just like a squirrel would forget he had hidden them and assumed that the ones he hid were stolen therefore justifying him hiding more which meant he'd think even more were being stolen.

Normies have immediately shot a request to repeal act to 98k signatures in less than a day.

Ehhhh kinda. It was at 20k or so a few days ago. The petition has existed for a couple months now. But yea the majority of it's come from today. Also don't forget that reform overwhelmingly won the locals so I don't even know if you can say cities are labour hives anymore.

 

[They were once men]

Normies have immediately shot a request to repeal act to 98k signatures in less than a day.
View attachment 7691271
View attachment 7691272
A lot of the signatures are concentrated in city areas (Labour hubs) but the spread seems relatively even.
Labour could get an easy win by repealing it and they can easily offload the blame for the act on the Conservatives anyway.

Has anything ever happened with these petitions aside from climate bollacks.

 

[Snackbarism]

I do wonder how things would have fared had they stuck with the "wanking license" approach rather than demanding facial recognition which people are figuring out how to beat.

As put in the other thread, for those who forgot about this inane idea that was thankfully dropped before it was even implemented.

Amongst the Brexit drama it’s easy to miss that an extraordinary anti-freedom, anti-personal responsibility set of regulations under the Digital Economy Act come into full force next month. From April, any internet service will face fines and consequences if pornographic material can be accessed on them by anyone under the age of 18. This means if anyone wants to watch porn in the UK, they will have to do one of three things…

1. Give your credit card details to a government approved company
2. Buy a Government approved porn pass from a newsagent for £8.99
3. Use a Virtual Private Network (VPN)

This means that anyone under the age of 18 will not be able to access pornography safely. Teenagers will have to either nick their parents credit cards, get an older person to buy a porn pass for them, or download the kind of VPN software used by dissidents living under authoritarian regimes, drug dealers, and child pornographers. Sexting will undoubtedly rise, with a ban making it easier for teenagers to send explicit pictures to each other than finding some on the internet, raising a swathe of new child safety concerns. Any politician thinking teenagers simply won’t watch porn is living in a fantasy world…

The consequences for platforms like Twitter or Reddit, some users of which post pornographic content, are disconcertingly ambiguous. When this has happened on some sites in the past, indiscriminate crack downs have accidentally hit vital resources for struggling teens, particularly LGBT services…

Quite apart from the child safety concerns, adults will also be driven to VPN use and the dark web audience will massively expand. People will be rightly concerned about handing over credit card details to porn companies’ age verification checkers. The leading age verification service, AgeID, is owned by the company that also owns PornHub, YouPorn and RedTube. Creating an enormous database of literally millions of credit card details linked to pornographic preferences. What could possibly go wrong..?

Having to humiliatingly purchase a government approved ‘porn licence’ is the kind of nonsense Guido would expect from an authoritarian regime. Instead of sheepishly shuffling in to a newsagents to hand over their £9 ‘Tossing Tax’, less technologically savvy adults will inevitably stumble into giving out their credit card details to nefarious actors, or downloading viruses instead of legitimate VPNs. This legislation is a fraudster’s dream…

The electoral implications will be bigger than politicians realise. The Tories suffered huge consequences from younger voters over fox hunting. Thanks to the prudish cowardice of most MPs, there hasn’t been a big uproar over this egregiously draconian legislation yet. But self reported polls suggest that three quarters of men admit to watching porn and the true number is likely to be higher. If politicians are brave enough there could be huge electoral mileage in a campaign to Repeal the Porn Laws…

Yes, you too could have bought a wank card from the paki shop to go with your lottery tickets, booze and fags.

VPN uptake has no doubt skyrocketed, all whilst people try to mess around with the facial scanners by using pictures of the usual bad taste squad of nonces and serial killers.

 

[FedPostalService]

Normies have immediately shot a request to repeal act to 98k signatures in less than a day.
View attachment 7691271
View attachment 7691272
A lot of the signatures are concentrated in city areas (Labour hubs) but the spread seems relatively even.
Labour could get an easy win by repealing it and they can easily offload the blame for the act on the Conservatives anyway.

Bunch of n00bs. We’ve all got our VPNs on and typing “nigger” on here whilst watching choke porn.

 

[Mound Dweller]

Normies have immediately shot a request to repeal act to 98k signatures in less than a day.
View attachment 7691271
View attachment 7691272
A lot of the signatures are concentrated in city areas (Labour hubs) but the spread seems relatively even.
Labour could get an easy win by repealing it and they can easily offload the blame for the act on the Conservatives anyway.

In the time it took me to DO MY PART it went up another few k.

When's the "tell the ECHR to fuck off" one?

 

[Tom Nook's Gloryhole]

Bunch of n00bs. We’ve all got our VPNs on and typing “nigger” on here whilst watching choke porn.

Personally I want it repealed not because I'd be missing out on anything (if anything, I love the idea that technologically inept niggers around me are suffering) but because it's 100% clear that a free internet overwhelms the police.

I want them panicking while having to police Palestine protests and migrant hotels and drain them day by day so that when Ariana Grande 2 or the Summer of Love 2 happens, they're already tired and overstretched. They'd cave in days.

 

[Nopenopenope]

Starmer getting buck broken by his own party again


BBC News link

What do? Trump is on his way to the UK and without that trade deal Labour are fucked, everyone already thinks they are fiscally incompetent. Recognising Palestine is a guaranteed way to start the whole negotiation on a sour note, is it worth the risk sinking it to appease gay lefties?

I'm sure the answer in Labour is yes, it is. As usual it is benefits for everyone, infinity brown people, and take a big economic shit on the floor on the way out of Downing street.

 

[Whoopsie Daisy]

Palestine will be recognised because we are a muslim state. The jew messenger from across the pond can come and attempt to offer appeasement and to push support for israel, but it will fall on deaf ears.

OTOH, Macron only recognised the palestinian state if gaza is rebuilt and both jews and muslims accept one anothers' shitty strip of land. So who knows what could happen

 

[femboy fart huffer]

Personally I want it repealed not because I'd be missing out on anything (if anything, I love the idea that technologically inept niggers around me are suffering) but because it's 100% clear that a free internet overwhelms the police.

To be honest, as much as I fucking hate the law and tor is a nigger. I hope it doesn't get repealed. I hope that ofcom try to prosecute what is not their jurisdiction and get met with the same level of lawyer that null had aside from in court instead of a letter. I sincerely hope that they fuck around otherwise they will not find out. As much as I would love to see the rats scurry back to the holes from whence they came I would love to see them do so under overwhelming legal and general political force instead even more. I do not want this to be repealed to make the average retard happy. I want them to fucking suffer so they know exactly what the government thinks of them and I do not want the government to be seen as caring or listening, I want them to be seen as the pathetic faggots they are. I want to have something more recent than 1916 or 1773 to demonstrate, not just that our government are shit and inept, but the absolute fucking laughing stock of the world. I want them to get their shit pushed in so hard by a foreign power it humbles every last one of them for the foreseeable future.

 

[Crunkle]

VPN uptake has no doubt skyrocketed

Correct

 

[A-Logato]

I actually really hope every site just geo blocks the UK. Make everyone furious that they can't access anything on the internet and parliament actually sees major pressure to reverse all of this.