<2022-01-10T17:39:09.000Z> Chance: I see Mr poast. All responses are confidential. Thank you 
<2022-01-10T18:26:00.000Z> Chance: no sir. i am not sure who sodapoppin is
<2022-01-10T18:55:14.000Z> Chance: nice to meet you too fren
<2022-01-12T00:44:12.000Z> Chance: idk i think im still just shook from last night.feels like every couple of days i am reminded that i am in fact not really good at anything. im just kind of here. doing nothing. and nothing seems interesting enough to commit too because im afraid if i commit to one thing ill miss out on something else 
<2022-01-12T00:57:01.000Z> Chance: a lot of this place is a larp. i think most people are fake. i do really just want a family. but i have no real thing that would attract women
<2022-01-12T00:57:09.000Z> Chance: i also want to do music
<2022-01-12T00:57:27.000Z> Chance: but once again i dont seem to be smart enough to understand things on deeper levels
<2022-01-12T00:59:11.000Z> Chance: if thats the case i have never wanted to do anything
<2022-01-12T01:00:04.000Z> Chance: uhhhh not really
<2022-01-12T01:00:17.000Z> Chance: i did that for rockband stuff
<2022-01-12T01:01:22.000Z> Chance: i started off with the base drum kit. wanted pro drums. so i made custom ones. then i just purchased a real electric drum kit. 
<2022-01-12T01:02:32.000Z> Chance: like. understanding the whys and hows 
<2022-01-12T01:03:02.000Z> Chance: music theory. writing music. 
<2022-01-12T01:03:08.000Z> Chance: its all stuff i have put time to
<2022-01-12T01:04:47.000Z> Chance: like most things. i just dont understand whats going on
<2022-01-12T01:05:19.000Z> Chance: i was improving when i had a real music teacher. but even then i did not understand the backend of music. only the front end
<2022-01-12T01:06:42.000Z> Chance: but how do i compose music if i dont understand how composing music works?
<2022-01-12T01:07:03.000Z> Chance: i can play music. and i have a natural feel for it. but i cant for the life of me grasp anything past that
<2022-01-12T01:07:43.000Z> Chance: im trying to get another drum kit so i can start again
<2022-01-12T01:08:02.000Z> Chance: but its like a grand for the stuff i need
<2022-01-12T01:08:09.000Z> Chance: and i dont have a grand rn
<2022-01-12T01:08:37.000Z> Chance: well. i do. i dont have a grand to spare right now
<2022-01-12T01:09:19.000Z> Chance: yeah. thats what im trying to do right now
<2022-01-12T01:11:18.000Z> Chance: what do you mean exactly?
<2022-01-12T01:12:17.000Z> Chance: ive been sick and at home since thursday. so thats probably part of it
<2022-01-12T01:14:57.000Z> Chance: well that would be making friends/getting a gf. im essentially an unwilling shut-in and i have lost all ability to socialize with new people
<2022-01-12T01:16:44.000Z> Chance: i just want to have friends and go out and do stuff. but idk how to do that and im deathly afraid of going out and doing it
<2022-01-12T01:18:14.000Z> Chance: uh not really. aside from like gaming which i dont even really enjoy. and i suppose cars might be in that area
<2022-01-12T01:20:00.000Z> Chance: theres nobody my age at church and i cant make it to the big city to go to a really good church very much
<2022-01-12T01:23:23.000Z> Chance: im going up there with my sister when she goes to events and such. so i got that
<2022-01-12T01:24:10.000Z> Chance: we havent been up there because the event got pushed back
<2022-01-12T01:24:23.000Z> Chance: i went up there for christmas midnight mass once. thats the only time ive been up there
<2022-01-12T01:25:06.000Z> Chance: its super hard to get up there because i work nights and getting up in time to drive an hour or more and make it there is almost impossible
<2022-01-12T01:38:42.000Z> Chance: The only times I'm actually happy is when I'm socializing. I only play video games because they allow me to socialize with people 
<2022-01-12T01:43:45.000Z> Chance: but i am not motivated to do anything
<2022-01-12T01:49:54.000Z> Chance: i have no idea what it would be
<2022-01-12T02:15:07.000Z> Chance: i spend a lot of time watching car content. i just want to be able to afford to work on and modify cars
<2022-01-12T02:47:25.000Z> Chance: thats cool man. get some rest
<2022-01-12T02:50:45.000Z> Chance: i havent been okay in a long time. but ill figure something out eventually
<2022-01-12T17:24:24.000Z> Chance: Yessir
<2022-01-12T17:24:47.000Z> Chance: Lots of pedophiles around these here parts 
<2022-01-12T17:26:04.000Z> Chance: What did they do
<2022-01-12T17:28:51.000Z> Chance: Oh yeah most of Americans are fucked 
<2022-01-12T17:29:40.000Z> Chance: They say they are based and redpilled blah blah blah but then believe in things like porn, casual sex, etc. None of which are compatible with what they claim to believe. 
<2022-01-12T17:30:13.000Z> Chance: My friend says he's based while he talks about marvel movies. 
<2022-01-12T17:32:17.000Z> Chance: Surprisingly my parents kept us off of tv. We never had cable or anything. We watched John Wayne and other old movies. And only select newer ones. Then we got some video games and those were usually pretty based. 
<2022-01-12T17:34:29.000Z> Chance: My parents are not super based. But they put the framework down for me to be based. 
<2022-01-12T17:35:54.000Z> Chance: They are 100% still effected by it 
<2022-01-12T17:37:25.000Z> Chance: The easiest and clearest way to tell if someone is actually still a brainwashed nigger Jew is to ask them about sexual morality. That is the deepest engrained piece of this. If all else changes that is still likely to be there. If they think sex before marriage is perfectly fine and using birth control is perfectly fine etc. Etc. They are brainwashed 
<2022-01-12T17:39:33.000Z> Chance: Oh okay. I never actually thought of that 
<2022-01-12T17:40:23.000Z> Chance: I have met old people that could remember "better" times. But nobody alive right now remembers the really good times 
<2022-01-12T17:40:42.000Z> Chance: Whatever that time was 
<2022-01-12T17:52:19.000Z> Chance: It's so much worse than most think 
<2022-01-12T17:52:31.000Z> Chance: You just gotta hold on 