<2022-12-24T12:57:10.000Z> SuperLutheran: Hey brother, Crux said you were going through some rough times. I'm here to listen and help if you'd like :)
<2022-12-25T00:00:13.000Z> festivity: Sorry mate, I just woke up. I think it'll be okay, I'm just thankful for the presence of the people on this website and that you (and others) have developed the masculine ability to offer compassion to others despite maybe growing up around the computer or with single mothers etc.Thank-you very much for your time. Merry Christmas :D
<2022-12-25T00:45:18.000Z> SuperLutheran: Happy to be of service man. Offer's still up in the future if you need anything. Merry Christmas!
<2022-12-25T23:16:01.000Z> festivity: Do you have any solutions for what to do when you're really tired of things. absolutely completely over them
<2022-12-25T23:16:56.000Z> festivity: Praying seems to do a really minimal amount and the advice I get is consult your pastor, reaffirm the scripture but I've been in this hole since I was a child and nothing's really changed
<2022-12-25T23:17:44.000Z> festivity: My life has been horrible for at least 9 years. I realise this is a heavy burden and I'm not asking you to fix it, do you have some other activity I could do that would actually make me feel better while the Lord works on his invisible plan.
<2022-12-25T23:17:49.000Z> festivity: Thank-you for your patience 
<2022-12-25T23:21:10.000Z> SuperLutheran: Well,
<2022-12-25T23:22:14.000Z> SuperLutheran: During times of misery, there's a temptation to look inward and think about one's problems. To a certain extent that is necessary: if I feel like crap all the time because I can't sleep, I should look at my daily life and see how to fix my insomnia.
<2022-12-25T23:22:42.000Z> SuperLutheran: That's what you might call "solutions focused" problem. solving. 
<2022-12-25T23:23:27.000Z> SuperLutheran: But there's another aspect to dealing with misery that most people, especially most therapists, refuse to consider. 
<2022-12-25T23:23:35.000Z> SuperLutheran: The external focus.
<2022-12-25T23:24:57.000Z> SuperLutheran: Philippians 2:3 says "do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves."
<2022-12-25T23:25:41.000Z> SuperLutheran: In my experience, putting forward a concerted effort to help others and care about them more than myself put my sorrows on the backbones.
<2022-12-25T23:27:23.000Z> SuperLutheran: Most depression goes away on its own when you pour your good will on others, helping them and giving when you can. Not many sad charity volunteers out there. If it doesn't help after a few weeks, then going through a period of solutions-focused work for a few weeks, switching off between the two or doing both at once helps out.
<2022-12-25T23:28:05.000Z> festivity: Alright thanks mate, sorry to bother you on Christmas.
<2022-12-25T23:28:15.000Z> SuperLutheran: Example: if you make sure your diet is cleaned up, that you're working out, having positive media in your life, going to Church, etc., that's all healthy solutions work.
<2022-12-25T23:28:45.000Z> SuperLutheran: But then you can make yourself literally too busy to be sad by volunteering at the homeless shelter. Just an example, but it works.
<2022-12-25T23:29:32.000Z> SuperLutheran: I don't know if this answers any of the specifics of your situation, but maybe you could try it out? If it doesn't work, we can get to the next step  :)
<2022-12-25T23:29:51.000Z> SuperLutheran: And btw don't apologize lol, most pastors are still doing lots of work rn 
<2022-12-25T23:45:15.000Z> festivity: Yeah but I asked a pastor what it was like being one and he looked away from me and his eyes got really big and he said it was hard because people are constantly relying on you or something to that affect (he is the only source of counsel was the impression) and that really stuck with me so I still try not to trouble people
<2022-12-25T23:48:09.000Z> festivity: I realise that I don't have the strength to deal with the problems God has given me, but when you don't want to deal with them it's a bit crushing/frustrating 
<2022-12-25T23:48:28.000Z> festivity: 'Yeah I get it, give me a crap family haha - ok, please can you get this over with'
<2022-12-26T01:32:01.000Z> SuperLutheran: Tbf fam that's one of the parts I like. 
<2022-12-26T01:32:50.000Z> SuperLutheran: I rejoice that God has called me to be someone's 3 am guy lol
<2022-12-26T01:33:04.000Z> festivity: haha xD